Quote:
"I spent the evening trying to 'breakthrough' before a final toke (3 journies?) left me in an empty room, a theatre is the best way to describe it. With a hollow smoke like dancer. I got the feeling the entities were done with me. I had had enough. The show was over.
...
I was a toddler who was scalded by his parents, and laid on the floor pouting for awhile.
Wow. One must respect this magic."
Hi Echopio
So, you've been "told off"? Ha ha.

I think I know what you mean. It happened to me last Friday*. It had never happened before. I had really beautiful and instructive encounters lately. Last week I was doing a series, usually 2-3 DMT sessions a day (late evenings, after work). This was exceptionally often. The technical reason it got so often last week was that
I was testing a method of intake. Previously I wasn't doing it that often, and I've planned to keep the balance.
Well, actually my trip planning is based on advice and counsel I get from the other side. I don't do drugs. I don't spontaneously go partying on drugs. I don't do party drugs. I am an explorer. I believe in the therapeutic potential of psychedelics. And I want to learn, I'd like to understand the other side.
In my perception they, the entities from the other side (or other dimensions, depending on what model of reality you wish to use), and me together have developed a responsible trip schedule. This allows for deep immersion into the psychedelic world while maintaining a low public profile (e.g. not attracting attention as obvious "drug user", especially at work and at various other social activities). What I am trying to say is that they, the "machine elves" (I'll stick to this expression since it's well established), ensure I keep up a responsible drug use. I have no doubt whatsoever that these entities actually care for my well-being. Yes, they do, and how! They do not want me to drop out. Obviously, they want my best. I love them. And I love them especially for caring.
So, you've been told off by them? Ha ha! As said, they told me off too, last Friday. It was the first time they did. And it was exactly what you would expect from somebody who really cares for you and your well-being. It was gentle, yet as clear as you'd expect from master psychologists. That said, it was as constructive a feedback as you'd expect it to come from master psychologists.
They know me (well I guess they do). And meanwhile I know them, a little bit at least, and their... style

I think it is appropriate to say that we have a good and stable relationship that allows them telling me off. They know that I admit I am a monkey. They know I like monkey business, helter-skelter and the like. So, they knew that I'd be back regardless of being told off. To talk things over. To thoroughly understand why I was told off.
The main argument the entities "advocated" seemed that I had been doing DMT a little bit too often. Well no, that is actually a contradiction:
First I was doing DMT strictly as often as I had decided TOGETHER WITH THE ENTITIES. Basically I always arranged the date for the next DMT trips during come-down (like you'd do with your shrink at the end of the session). I set that date with the entities sometimes very exactly, e.g. "see you next Friday", "in an hour again", sometimes more flexibly, e.g. "earliest in two weeks, or in three weeks, as you feel" ). Whenever I sticked to this arranged dates, I had very positive DMT experiences. Doing extra DMT trips, though, hasn't really been rewarding. Well, that isn't quite right. They still were insightful, but the message usually still was clearly that I should return only on the pre-arranged days or when I feel I have a real emergency.
I have to admit that I am a master of pretext. I'll find you any argument to justify an extra DMT trip any time.

An argument that'll sound convincing enough even to the machine elves? Well keep on dreaming, that's the point. Do you really believe I could trick master psychologists into accepting mere pretext for doing an extra DMT tour although we've arranged a more strict schedule? So... It appeared to me that their concern was "home work first" when they gently let me hang (or "told me off" to put it in your words).
They knew that at that point of my DMT involvement I wasn't going to take a break (and integrate the experiences) until there was no spice left. I was vaping it in series, the experiences were so nice, so cool, so fantastic, so inspiring and fruitful, so marvelous, so LOVELY, yes indeed, LOVE they were, and empowering. Vaping DMT at home was the place to be. At his point you could have compared my DMT consumption pattern with the pattern of Cocaine affection (snorting on till supply's all gone)... I consumed 3.5-4g of DMT in 3-4 months, usually vaping 50-60mg. This would have continued. UNLESS, of course, they CLEARLY instruct me to take that required break and integrate my experiences. I know myself well enough to know (and admit) that sometimes I need a kick in the backside. So, they did. Gently.
First my fear, though, was that I had done something wrong. That I had shown a bad attitude. Bad moral. Something not up to the standards expected by the elves... I'm sure you know what I want to say.
I didn't get that it was about having a break. So I went back. I did another extra DMT trip. Yes I did. I told them that I feel unsure about my behaviour. That I need to know more. Now they made their expectations very clear to me, and they were 100% sensible. There's basically a load of stuff I got to get done now.
Ok, I am a soldier (well I've done draft military service in my country). When I am ordered to do things (by legitimate superiors), I do. No need to tell me anything twice. So they told me it's about integrating things now. Then we scheduled the next two encounters together: in total I had three additional trips right after being told off as described above. Yeah, I did... But they were somehow "flatter". I got the impression the entities are under pressure too. They seemed hectic. As if they hadn't really have time for me. As if something was up in hyperspace. They were there. But they seemed busy. Yet, the first trip after being told off was soothing. I understood there was no serious issue between them and me. The second one started good. And then it became somewhat flat. Like there's nothing really to go into. Or was it simply that I didn't dose high enough? It was as if there was nothing to review. That's the message I got. Or should I start doing higher doses, and the trips won't be flat but immersive? I wasn't (and still am not) really sure about that. If they want me to take a break it just might not be very appropriate to continue with higher doses, arguing that I understand they want me to increase the dose, right?
I thought I know what they expect. Me take break. At the same time they supported me coming again the next day. So I had some contradictory information. On one side I felt that they expect me to integrate my experiences first, before continuing. On the other side I was welcome to come again already the next day. Basically this message, integrated, means that I should integrate my experiences really fast, within 24 hours, right?
I simply did as I was told, and I did a DMT trip the next day, Sunday afternoon. It was a very instructive lesson I received. Then the entities and I parted and agreed that I could use the residue in the pen for a recreational trip sometime later on Sunday and that then I should abstain during the week. If I had a serious issue I could come the following Sunday, otherwise I should basically skip the following week too (I should take a break of two weeks all in all that meant). This seemed logical to me. I had intended to skip DMT every other week, to keep the balance (
as stated in my introduction), but by end of March I had been doing DMT for two weeks basically multiple times daily (I was so happy and excited about
my magic wand).
I understood being "told off" on DMT as a signal that I missed something. It's very similar to school. When you don't listen to the teacher or don't do your homework, then you get told off. I feel that I learn on DMT and develop. Ok, I think that I'm still in the nursery. It's a nice place. Really. I love it. And I love the others there too. There's still a lot to learn. So in regard of this position I have, basically in nursery, I don't think being told to take a break really is a drama.
Currently I feel that a series of DMT sessions is like a chapter of a school book, and several chapters form a part of a school book. Once you're through with a chapter (or a part), you need to integrate what you've learned. This requires a break. And maybe you need to prepare for exams too? Or you could compare DMT experiences to a theatre play, and multiple DMT sessions form an act. In the theatre there's usually a break too. The grand drape closes for the break. You refresh yourself. Maybe you discuss the play with your seat neighbour? Maybe you prepare yourself mentally for the next part of the play. And then the grand drape reopens, the play continues.
* I started to write this reply on March 29, so "last Friday" refers to March 24. I only finished this reply on June 23. Redacted it a little bit and added this and that.