I hope this finds you all doing well.
As a new member to DMT Nexus, I wanted to introduce my self.
My journey began a few years ago. I was approaching middle age, dealing with obesity and some serious health issues associated with my weight and diet and I was in constant pain from a back injury. Additionally, I was dealing with some negative experiences from my time as an emergency and flight nurse in addition to a couple of bad experiences in Afghanistan. Basically, I was in a very miserable headspace. In addition, I was in graduate school, studying pharmacology with a focus on toxicology. I remember spending a few weeks on psychedelics and "hallucinogenics" in general and was astonished to find that these agents (with a few exceptions) which I had always been told were deadly and addictive were not particularly toxic or habit forming. Additionally, I became aware of studies that actually demonstrated potential medical benefit (MDMA and psilocybin being two specific examples).
While the focus of my studies was not on psychedelics, I was fascinated and ended up doing additional research. This eventually led me to my first psychedelic experience a couple of years ago. Through a series of events, I found myself in a peyote ceremony. I still have vivid memories of that experience. I remember having feelings of transcendence as I merged into the surrounding mountains and starry night sky, I remember feeling love for the entire universe and I remember the sickness and purging as I was forced to re-examine my thoughts and feelings as they related to experiences I had been through.
This first experience was literally a "self destruct" button. My mind was literally "blown." As I began to decompress and put things back together in the following weeks, I found several pieces no longer fit and I threw them away. I also found an affinity and love of nature and being in the out of doors. I ended up buying a mountain bike and learned how to ride off road. This eventually lead me to begin racing and as of this year, I have completed two endurance races and have at least one more planned this season. The physical changes were astonishing. While I still have some lingering back pain, I have accepted it and simply moved on and no longer allow it to rule my life.
Aside from the physical advantages, I began to experience a marked shift in how I viewed the world. There was a lot more nuance and uncertainty and strongly held beliefs began to crumble to give way to a more open and loving position on life. My wife commented that she had never seen me so at ease following that first experience and she has been very supportive as I move foreword.
Since then, I have had a few more peyote experiences and my first DMT experience about a week ago. I hope to learn more about this world and how to safely and effectively negotiate the psychedelic experience in a way that is supportive and uplifting.