"A Small Walk With Shiva : The Meeting"
This one has me puzzled. The story begins with our recent trip to Chicago, in which we had tickets to see David Gilmour perform live. After a long, uncomfortable bus ride (12 hours both ways), pushy homeless people, and hustlers around every corner, we did eventually get to the show. It was absolutely unbelievable. Like a DMT experience, it just happened to us. The concert was nearly 3 hours but was not long enough for me as I could have listened to that music for the rest of my life, or until my ears gave out on me. Even then, I'd still be content to just feel the vibrations. I'm still getting chills thinking about it. Of course, none of this really has anything to do with this mushroom journey but on our way home, we decided that we would eat some mushrooms as a final hurrah for the mini vacation we took.
I have felt that I haven't been going as far as I would like to with my babies and thought that perhaps it was because I was not chewing them up enough. To remedy this problem, I blended the mushrooms (4.5g cracker dry each) into powder and mixed them into a cup of orange juice. Don't get me wrong, my experiences lately have been profound, just in ways I didn't expect. I am aware that we should leave expectations at the door, but in order to fully work with these plants there has to be some intention which, in a sense, is a form of expectation.
So we got home around 1130pm, and had the mushrooms ingested no later than 12am. Using this OJ method, it came on pretty swiftly. We decided to take a shower to help pass the time and ease the initial come up jitters. By the time we got out of the shower, our eyes were already dilated,
"We need to hurry...I can already hear them babe. They will be here soon..." she said.
This always fascinates me. We were only 30, maybe 45 minutes into the experience and she could already feel entities nearby, gathering... waiting to communicate once again. We came into the bedroom and got comfy on the bed. For the next hour and a half we said pretty much nothing to each other...just feeling the energy build up around us. A vibratory phenomenon it seemed. Pulsating and alive! It was like being drenched in warm, electrified water that you can breathe in without drowning or being shocked to death.
At about 1.5-2 hours in or so, she turned to me and said,
"Do you feel anything...?"
Jokingly I said, "no babe, I don't feel anything at all!"
She then looked downwards and seemed confused and said, "are you joking? or telling the truth..."
"I'm joking babe, I'm sorry...I do feel it, quite strongly actually...I...uh...I..."
I didn't really know what else to say at that point, I thought maybe she had got caught in a time loop because she thought that she must not have waited long enough for the mushrooms to work. This was in fact, quite the opposite of what was about to happen (happening). Honestly, this wouldn't be the first time I've heard about or encountered a trip that "stopped" right before it blew up into some crazy heavy peak period. I just held her close and let the confusion pass, which it did after a few minutes.
Due to the strangeness of the last trip, I decided I would not place any rules or stipulations upon what happens. I told her that if she wanted to make love (or do anything else in the world, whatever it may be) that we would do it with no questions asked. I know no one really cares to hear about these parts but love making on mushrooms is pure bliss. So that is what we did for a while and it was good...
It seems that the physical activity increased the visual aspects for us both, and it is after this point where things really kicked into HIGH GEAR!
Entities making contact in the bathroom with my GF seems to be a common theme. That and the mirror play big roles in these events. Upon entering the bathroom the first time, she reported that she may in fact BE one of the beings that she encounters. While gazing in the mirror, she saw herself adorned with jewelry and a crown, in the same style as the "important ones" as she calls them...
It seemed to her that this was important, a part of her in some way. She belonged there, or came from there at some point in time, be it a past or future life. Whatever it was, she felt like she may have found home.
She came out of the bathroom and quickly started telling me all these things. I couldn't write them down at the time because my handwriting would look like a drunk 3rd grader learning cursive so I asked her again about these things over the past two days and we have since been drawing theories and possible conclusions based on notes and observations.
All of these recent trips have made me think that my GF is more in tune with spirituality than anyone I have ever personally tripped with. Almost like she is a perfect conduit for supreme energy. I have also realized that I have become her mouthpiece for these events. So, in some respects, it seems as though we are a perfect match...two earthly beings who were meant to be here, to tell these stories. Even if they mean nothing, it does not make it any less interesting or important to us.
Moving on, her next trip into the bathroom was probably one of the most significant psychedelic events I've ever been a witness to, and it wasn't even happening to me. She reported that upon gazing in the mirror again, that she was still adorned with beautiful jewels and that it seemed like she was supposed to be there. That is when Lord Shiva appeared.
She said that it was in a sort of "swooping in" motion that he came into her line of vision. Almost like Shiva was approving of what was happening and was trying to send her a message. She said that she didn't know if he was there in the room or not so she turned around only to see nothing but when she turned back around towards the mirror, he was the only thing she could see, and that she was completely enveloped by him. She was him. He was her.
"I am he as you are he as you are me
And we are all together"
I think John Lennon may have been onto something here! Eventually the image of him faded, but the message was strong albeit a little unclear. We are still trying to piece that one together,
"Oh my, babe, I just met one of the Gods...I don't know which one, but I know he was powerful and one considered prominent..."
"okay, well we can look it up if you want..." I said.
That is what we did, as her visions seemed to come in waves. We searched and searched until we finally found out that Shiva is indeed the one she met. Normally, the entities seem to have some sort of ranking system, none of them being too notable. This is important because she said that she has felt Shiva before and is more than likely the one that told her that he is always with her in previous trips. But Shiva had an enormous presence, shutting out anything else at that moment when meeting him. The energy was immense.
"It felt too familiar to be anyone else..." she said.
Now, this is the only time he made a face to face appearance but there were still some strange synchronicity(s) that played out later. I don't know a lot about Shiva, except that he is supposed to be the destroyer according to the Hindu triumvirate. In this case, he destroyed my GF's identity and made both of us question the nature of existence. I think it is strange that we are both born and raised Americans, with semi-typical religious upbringing, yet the beings and messages that come through to us, are completely separate from anything we have EVER learned. Neither of us have studied any Hindu religions, so it seems strange to me that these things would come up in an experience. I've read all about the pragmatic approach to what is real, but I can't help but question some things here...Nature of the game, I suppose. We are not losing our grip on reality, we are simply punching holes in the logic behind it.
This initial meeting with Shiva was quite fascinating, even if short lived. he did not come back the rest of the night. However, he may have made an appearance in a different form in one of my lady's later visions.
At a later time, who knows when, she said that I became one of THEM too. I was a blue skinned almost reptilian sort of being in which my "real face" (or the face of this reality) was hiding behind my newly found "beingness"...It actually startled her for a moment. Startled me too to be honest. I didn't spend too much time in the bathroom or gazing at mirrors so who knows... although, naturally, my skin did look weird to me too. Yay, more thoughts to ponder! hehe!
At some point we decided to go outside and have a tobacco sort of ceremony. Nothing special, we just go outside, smoke, and think a lot...hehe...tripping is the only time we enjoy tobacco anymore so....yeah...
Anywho, she said she needed to use the restroom first so while she was in there, I whipped out my electric guitar and started playing some bluesy riffs and solos. just experimenting here and there with the different sounds. Little did I know that I would be setting the stage for her to peak even harder. Music absolutely has the ability to guide one further into the trip safely. This is what I did for her. We forgot about going outside, and I just played whatever came to me. In one such instance, I noticed her going into a trancy closed eye state, so I kept playing.
When she came back she reported that she had been transported to "the rolling hills of Ireland"
It was sunny and brilliantly lit. There were butterflies and dragonflies roaming around happily and carefree. Everything was organic and beautiful. Shifting. Existing. Living. Perfect.
She was not alone. A young boy wearing Oliver Twist-esque clothing was accompanying her. They ran and ran until they reached a barn with the doors wide open. Inside was another young boy who was wearing a tattered sack cloth (like the Hebrew slaves from the biblical days). Together they unraveled a mysterious energy which grew in strength and swirled into a black hole style vortex. I think the black hole is an interesting concept since I've read in a few places that Shiva may sometimes be considered a black hole, capable of destroying whole star systems and more. Not sure if it is related, but again we are just doing our best to draw conclusions.
This black hole grew into a pure light. A pure energy beam of sorts. When one thing is destroyed, something new is born, again on point with Shiva it seems. Whatever it was, she didn't have enough time to explore as she said it was over as quickly as it began.
I continued to musically guide her next few visions, but most of which were either unspoken or not important enough to mention. All I know is that she went DEEP! Probably a lot deeper than any other time we have tripped on anything! And that includes DMT! She mentioned that the beings are usually 2d-ish and stick to the walls but they sometimes surround her and pull her into different realms. This time, however, she said that they were nearly popping out of the walls in a full blown 3d "in your face" effect. My personal trip was nothing even close to any of that. I can't really put my finger on it but mine are deep in a different way, a lot less mystical. I've only ever met beings on DMT.
Even on 9g mushrooms, I still never experienced things like she did. It is so wonderful to be able to be here for her to try and assemble coherent thoughts about such things. My trips are profound but usually just insightful and full of amazing shapes and colors. No beings or mystical conclusions. I've been doing this for a while but every time I trip with her I am blown away by her intensity. I wouldn't trade it for anything!
This is getting incredibly long so I'll try to wrap this up. We are thirsty for more knowledge on Shiva and what you all think on this matter. Trying to make sense of the seemingly nonsensical is quite the task, I tell you what...but her visions were so clear and concise it is hard not to get wrapped up meanings. For now, it is what it is and we are what we are. The answers may never come...so for now I've got observation and speculation at my side as my exploratory instruments. We will keep pressing onwards and upwards, for now and forever!
If you took the time to read all this, bless you, I always love hearing what the Nexus community has to say about such matters. I hope I made things clear because this was really hard to put into context properly. Thank you for your time and have a lovely day!
Yours Truly,
-The Grateful One-
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