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Realizing what a recurring hallucination had always been Options
 
naepius
#1 Posted : 3/30/2016 11:26:04 PM

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Early on in my experiences with DMT, I noticed a recurring element among many of the more pleasant, warm journeys. I would hear what sounded like water drops (or plops) - always three of them. The first harsh sounding, not much like a plop, and very much like a small water drop hitting a piece of sheet metal. The second a classic water plop of a raindrop hitting a pool of water. The third more so like a very large rain drop, deeper in tone and deflected, more like a 'drop' than a 'plop' if mimicking the sound by vocalizing the words in a loud whisper with no vocal chord vibration.

What always struck me as significant was a rush of feeling that would come along with hearing them - a sense that I made it, that I found the place I've been looking for. But from that moment on, the experiences would just linger in that warm place, whatever I desired to see would be drawn for me, but with nothing to show for introspective insight, revelations, or confounding visions.

Fast forward about 4 years from the time I first heard it and I'm completely sober, alone at home and just listening to music in my loft while getting this or that done. iPod is in IDDQD and 'The Trial' comes up and as usual, I'm singing along. I had to go downstairs for something and as I'm walking down the stairs and away from the loft/music, I discover I'm intuitively decreasing the volume of my voice as the volume of the music dies down, but still mouthing the words with very strong diction and airflow, just not vibrating my vocal chords for some reason.

...and then I heard them. The three plops. Coming from my throat every time I mouthed the phrase 'Tear down the wall' ...and then everything was after-glowy for hours and hours...

Smile
 

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Leithen
#2 Posted : 4/8/2016 12:41:51 PM

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Was this a song you listened to during any of your past experiences? Perhaps the phrase triggered a sort of memory or flashback.

Thanks for the share! I would like to read some more flashback experiences, (if that is what this is) as it seems there are a lot of misconceptions in that area, mostly about the negativity and severity of the experience.
“How long will this last, this delicious feeling of being alive, of having penetrated the veil which hides beauty and the wonders of celestial vistas? It doesn't matter, as there can be nothing but gratitude for even a glimpse of what exists for those who can become open to it.”
― Alexander Shulgin, Pihkal: A Chemical Love Story
 
entheogenic-gnosis
#3 Posted : 4/8/2016 2:08:49 PM
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Fascinating...

I've always felt that there's a bizarre connection to sound and the psychedelic experiance...as well as time and memory...

I had a similar experience, though when I make the noise it sounds kind of like a "beat-boxing clip", but it originated from trying to say the word "Nebuchadnezzar", I could make this sound and get a specific Synesthesia each time...

This was high dose psilocin...

Though my "sound" didn't seem to have the effect or impact of the "drops" described in the original post.

That is very interesting, thank you.




I have had a single reoccurring hallucination, that I have recently begun to try to understand...

I have this recurring hallucination with DMT, I feel like I'm at the bottom of a foggy mountain, I feel like a lost child, it's a bizzare 1/2 dream half hallucination type bit that occurs shortly after the "initial terror and chaos of the visual dmt circus"...

I've heard some call it "the dome" or the "cathedral"...however for me I'm clearly outside, it's dark and fog covers the sky, there's a long winding dirt road leading up a tall mountain, the dirt roads are wet and muddy, everything feels humid and wet, and I always feel first, like a child, and second, completely lost...I noticed once there were "street signs" but I was apparently too young to have learned to read, I bitterly felt like a lost child...

After this point, there's a transition into death and rebirth...which is typical DMT type stuff, but that mountain has always stood out to me, why was I being brought to this place over and over...

I keep running into this mountain theme in spirituality, in eastern faiths, in monotheistic faiths, and several other places...

I think it means my soul is still young, and I have a long way to go...

Though it was while listening to a song with this lyric "Here I stand the foot of Mt. Zion Oversee this world of Babylonians" and started thinking about being at the foot of sacred mountains, then thinking, I really do have a long way to go...

I'm not sure if I interpreted this reoccurring hallucination correctly, but it's bizarre that I would keep ending up there...

-eg




 
naepius
#4 Posted : 4/10/2016 1:14:07 PM

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Leithen wrote:
Was this a song you listened to during any of your past experiences? Perhaps the phrase triggered a sort of memory or flashback.

Thanks for the share! I would like to read some more flashback experiences, (if that is what this is) as it seems there are a lot of misconceptions in that area, mostly about the negativity and severity of the experience.


I know for a fact I've never listened to 'The Wall' during any tryptamine experiences. LSD ones many years ago perhaps Smile but not with any profound ties to the song in particular.

It's not without strong emotional ties and associations to altered states of mind, though. 'The Wall' was one of the cassette albums I would listen to quite often in early childhood. I have little recollection of the experiences, but to not stray too far away from topic @ hand of recurring dmt hallucinations I'll just point to my intro essay if you're curious.

The 'after-glowy' state, for me, is a fairly frequent thing with many triggers. Sounds and smells in particular associated to altered states of mind, but also things like writing, meditating, singing, pacing, etc can lead into what feels very much like to me to be a prolonged back-to-baseline state of mixed mild euphoria and amazement specific to what I've felt after dmt. The more emotion I pour into the activity, the stronger the effect.
 
naepius
#5 Posted : 4/10/2016 1:25:42 PM

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entheogenic-gnosis wrote:
Fascinating...

I've always felt that there's a bizarre connection to sound and the psychedelic experiance...as well as time and memory...

I had a similar experience, though when I make the noise it sounds kind of like a "beat-boxing clip", but it originated from trying to say the word "Nebuchadnezzar", I could make this sound and get a specific Synesthesia each time...


1st point, couldn't agree more, second gave me a chuckle because I often catch myself doing that same thing - saying a phonetically complicated word over and over, esp. with ones where visualizing the etymology/mythology associated to it can help 'hard-wise' it for quick recall so to say.


Not to say your interpretation of the mountain foot is incorrect, using the lyric example you gave, I see the hard road is through Babylon, attaching all hope to whatever may bring you back to sacred ground.

Perhaps you're going back to the foot is not to realize how far you've to go, but how far you've come to be at a place that brings with it guidance and protection for the rest of your journey. Where you've no longer a need to be attached to any one thing, but just to give and seek freely of yourself.
 
entheogenic-gnosis
#6 Posted : 4/10/2016 1:57:37 PM
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naepius wrote:
entheogenic-gnosis wrote:
Fascinating...

I've always felt that there's a bizarre connection to sound and the psychedelic experiance...as well as time and memory...

I had a similar experience, though when I make the noise it sounds kind of like a "beat-boxing clip", but it originated from trying to say the word "Nebuchadnezzar", I could make this sound and get a specific Synesthesia each time...


1st point, couldn't agree more, second gave me a chuckle because I often catch myself doing that same thing - saying a phonetically complicated word over and over, esp. with ones where visualizing the etymology/mythology associated to it can help 'hard-wise' it for quick recall so to say.


Not to say your interpretation of the mountain foot is incorrect, using the lyric example you gave, I see the hard road is through Babylon, attaching all hope to whatever may bring you back to sacred ground.

Perhaps you're going back to the foot is not to realize how far you've to go, but how far you've come to be at a place that brings with it guidance and protection for the rest of your journey. Where you've no longer a need to be attached to any one thing, but just to give and seek freely of yourself.


That's crazy that this language (language distortion) phenomenon connected to synaesthesia happens to more than just me, I wonder how common this really is?

The funny thing is, this was the first time I've ever told anybody about it, perhaps if I talked more about these things I would find that I'm not the only one...it's hard (frustrating) to talk about these things with people who won't understsnd, so I generally just never talk about them...

As for the mountain, I'm not sure, it may mean many things, but either to my psychology, or to my spirituality I know it's significant, the feeling t I get when I'm there is more real than my daily life...
I walked the road a way once, I felt like a lost child and I was running from "the monster", I got the distinct feeling of being chased, there were occasional signs, but I was too young to read and completely lost...
Other times I just stand in the mud in the fog and the rain, and feel exactly as I would if I was a child who was abandoned in an unfamiliar and foreign land, you don't want to walk, because you don't know where to go...

I don't understand it...

It already means so many things and yet I'm still completely baffled...

Again, ever since my first DMT experiance this hallucination has been present, and while I'm there I'm overcome with dejavu, it's like I'm living a dream I'm remebering from my childhood, I say "I remember this from the dream" but it's real, it's not a dream,...the feeling is indescribable...

And generally this is near the start of the flash, so after this "mountain phase" I have to transition into what I call the bardo...

I've posted this report probably far too many times and in too many threads, but it keeps comming up, this was not only my first round with DMT, it was a life changing event, a true ++++ (shulgin scale)
I thought there was nothing left to discover in psychedelia, my ventures with LSD and psilocybin seemed to have taken me as far as they could, and yet generally very little had changed..

Then this event occured, and nothing has been the same since
(I have had experiences on DMT, yagé, mescaline, psilocybin fungi, and so on of equal intensity since, yet the first DMT flash had impact that no other experiance before or since has had)

Quote:
he first time I smoked DMT I consumed 200mgs, light-yellow translucent Dimethyltryptamine crystals on top of high-grade marijuana, I cleared the DMT as well as the marijuana in a single breath, and before I could exhale (or even count to 5) I was in an overwhelming state of intense psychedelia. Visually the world was not recognizable, time ceased to exist, I remember going into a panic, thinking "get this shit out of me!" And exhaling as rapidly as possible...but it was too late. I remember looking around, I was at the bottom of a foggy mountain with dirt roads, I was overcome with an intense feeling of panic and deja-vu, I felt like a lost child, everything I knew about who I was or my life or earth seemed like a distant dream, like I dissolved out of existence, I interpreted this as dying, I knew that I was dead, and I was emotionally overwhelmed while confronting the event of my death...at first you want to reach out for help, you think "call the fire department, or I need to call my family", but you quickly realize it's just you and death and you have to come to terms with it alone. I could not tell if I was breathing or not, I would take air in, but couldn't feel it, I then noticed a pain in my chest, a giant mantis like being had its claws in my chest, it proceeded to tear open my chest and stomach removing all my organs and insides, I was about to go into shock when I saw a bright green light flash over my shoulder, it nearly hit me, it then became a beautiful geometric object,a glowing stone or jewel, morphing and color changing. The mantis then put this object in my torn up corpse. The mantis then began to make billions of these objects, each one unique and radiating beautiful colored light, and my hollowed out corpse was filled with them, replacing all the organs that had been removed. Then I was sealed up in a burning flash of red light, and my newly rebuilt body was propelled into an orange light where I was resurrected...then I felt as if I was being pushed through a membrane, I was being born....then back to reality....those who were there said in reality I curled up into a ball and began to cry for 15 minutes, I was wondering why my face was wet, because it felt like I had actually just went through being born...any way the immense deep spiritual and psychological implications of this experience left me for ever transformed, reborn as a new person entirely, it was the single most meaningful thing that has ever happened to me. -eg


...the mountain, after all that has happened, it should seem like nothing more than an oddity reoccurrence, most other aspects were more meaningful, such as death, dismemberment, resurrection and re-birth...yet I keep being taken to that mountain, there's something about it...


-eg
 
 
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