I suffer from bad depression and social anxiety. I came into DMT very much like you after the medicines, therapy, books etc. I read some articles on ayahuasca and some almost miracle accounts of it freeing people from anxiety and depression so I came to regard DMT as a bit of a last resort and once I got there was sort of hoping for a bit of a magic bullet.

So far I have had two massive 3-4hr experiences and two heavy ones and my anxiety and depression are just the same for now. What it has done is help me see what is important, really understand I am cared about and to stop pushing these people away or denying them and there really isn’t anything awful or bad in the recesses of my mind. Here was the biggest one if you are interested: https://www.dmt-nexus.me...aspx?g=posts&t=69975

I remember in an interview with a musician them saying that with psychedelics the real goal was to try get to the same places without them. I think I’m starting to understand that. I thought that in the experience I could somehow get in and root out the cause or fix me but I think it is more the reverse and that I need to try and take what I ‘know’ and feel in there experience back into normal life to help fix me.

On fear, this has been a big problem for me and I’ve realised just how much my mind fights like mad to try and control and hang on. They key for me has been to find a way to surrender knowing it isn’t a fight I can win and hang on to the feeling I had when I realised nothing awful or bad was locked away in my mind. I’ve also only been treated well by DMT and never given anything I couldn’t handle. A quote from The Secret Chief on this: "the only way to bring light to the darkness is to first embrace the darkness"

Aside: I’ve taken Pristiq’s close generic, Venlafaxine and went through hell in withdrawal - it does have a bad reputation for this so if you do decide to discontinue it please be careful.