Hi All. I have been researching the Nexus for a few months now and have gleaned a lot of information. But, I have some of my own questions that I am having trouble answering, so I decided to join.

I feel like there is a stigma out there concerning the topics of the conversations here, especially amongst my peers. Therefore, I won't be sharing any names. However, I am 36, Male, married with 3 kids (6, 5, and 3 yrs). I am in the IT industry, and up until recently owned a business for 10 years.

I grew up in a neighborhood with a lot of kids that didn't have good parenting or goals in their lives. At the age of 14 I started smoking. Around that same age I started drinking, and experimented for the first times with Marijuana. For the next few years, marijuana became a practically every day experience.

At the age of 17, I was introduced to LSD, Methamphetamine, and Cocaine (of the smokable form). Through various relationships, at the age of 17 I also manufactured my first batch of meth. I used the manufacture and distribution of meth (I hope this doesn't violate forum rules) to support my drug habits.

I through away my opportunities, let my family down, became a monster, and ended up in prison eventually. While in prison, God intervened, set me straight, and I have turned my life around.

Recently, I became curious again in chemistry and have been interested in some various "designer" drugs. Let me be clear, I am not a druggy, and I am not interested in, nor do I live a party lifestyle, or want to punish myself with ridiculous substances.

The entirety of what I do now is to further explore my sprituality, and other substances that may make me a better person, give me a better understanding, and to strengthen my relationships with others, especially my wife and kids.

In the past few months, I have acquired the tools, chemicals, and knowledge to experiment with a few things, starting very simple. I extracted DXM, then proceeded to consume it, to go to sleep, and wake up and throw up tripping 2 hours later after deciding "I wasn't feeling anything." Not my thing.

I came across DMT by accident, during my research, and decided to explore it further. I was able to successfully extract my first batch of DMT from 500g MHRB using an A/B method with nearly 1% yield.

Since then, I have experimented with it approximately 10-12 times, have entered hyperspace / ego death at least a half a dozen times, and have recently started exploring ayahuasca and oral administration. This is because the vape ride is so extreme, I am somewhat scared by it, I am not an experienced psychonaut, and I am looking for spirituality and enlightenment.

I hope that gives you more information than you wanted.

Have a great day!