In response to the original post.
This was a great report, the information included was very relatable and coincidences quite well with my own personal experience. Some people can report things that I can not relate to in any way, and I always wonder, how can DMT be so variable?
Quote:(Lyghtsout said) He said he didn't regret doing it, but he will NEVER do it again. He didn't blackout - he remembered the experience. He said he thought he was never coming back and it completely changed his perception of everything. He's more appreciative of life and feels naturally more tolerant and caring of others
This was identical to my first breakthrough...actually it was my first time.
Only I didn't start flopping around, or need to be restrained...
I did begin crying and bawling (which I still get teased for)
At one point they tried to put me on the phone with my girlfriend, but they said I began screaming at the phone "help me! For the love of God, HELP!"
It really freaked her out, my sitters had to awkwardly call back and explain...
And just before "the mantis" I can remember standing up and trying to feel if I was breathing...the air was going in, but I felt like I was not actually breathing for some reason...
When it was all over the pipe was still in my hand...
I have a full experiance report, but I've posted it so many times that I would feel overly redundant posting it again, but I guess I will...Again, sorry for telling this story so many times, but I consider it the most significant event in my life.
Quote:the first time I smoked DMT it was 200mgs yellow crystal on top of high-grade marijuana, I cleared it in a single hit. I remember feeling like I was at the bottom of a foggy mountain with dirt roads, I was overcome with an intense feeling of panic and deja-vu, I felt like a lost child, everything I knew about who I was or my life or earth seemed like a distant dream, like I dissolved out of existence, I interpreted this as dying, I knew that I was dead, and I was emotionally overwhelmed while confronting the event of my death....I could not tell if I was breathing or not, I would take air in, but couldn't feel it, then noticed a pain in my chest, a giant mantis like being had its claws in my chest, it proceeded to tear open my chest and stomach removing all my organs and insides, I was about to go into shock when I saw a bright green light flash over my shoulder, it nearly hit me, it then became a beautiful geometric object, morphing and color changing, like a jewel from hyperspace, the mantis then put this object in my torn up body, he began to make billions of these objects, each one unique and radiating beautiful colored light ans he filled my body with them, then I was sealed up and propelled into an orange light where I was resurrected...then I felt as if I was being pushed through a membrane, I was being born....then back to reality....those who were there said in reality I curled up into a ball and began to cry for 20 minutes, I was wondering why my face was wet, because it felt like I had actually just went through being born...any way the immense deep spiritual and psychological implications of this experience left me for ever transformed, reborn as a new person entirely, it was the single most meaningful thing that has ever happened to me
*note: the dose range discussed in this report is highly inflated, there is no reason to ever dose this high.
leading up to this event I had been frequently using high dose psychedelics of all kinds, particularly psilocybin and LSD, and while I had never tried DMT I thought that I knew enough to know what to expect, I thought my experiance with other compounds somehow made a difference in this situation, and I thought that surly I must need a massive dose...I was wrong.
And while I ended up curing my depression, developing a new love and enthusiasm for life and others, and discovering my spirituality, this was pure luck, and my unmindful actions could have resulted in disaster.
* this was a quick report centered on the highlights, there were some other things that happened that I chose to leave out.
Quote:shamanic abilities are generally brought on by a personal crisis, such as illness or sudden shock. where this is not naturally forthcoming, initiation designed to produce the effects of such a state are used to bring about rebirth as a shaman -J. Mathews;the shamanism bible
I've always thought that this kind of shock
was the experiance, and was essential, and that if the DMT failed to produce a "personal apocalypse", than it did not do its job...
Though after reading this, it becomes obvious that there are risks involved with pushing people into these experiences, and if you are going to take it upon yourself to initiate another person to the DMT breakthrough, you better be very well prepared to handle the worst case scenarios.
To me it was death, and yes, I felt I was never going to return...
The funny thing is, even though now I know that I will return, I can't shake the feeling that I permanently killed myself during every flash...I don't cry anymore, but it never gets easier.
It took months before I could gather the courage to try DMT again after my first flash
-eg