Life is a spiral, in its extremes you either spiral in and the switching between sides becomes very rapid, everything is happening so fast, you know nothing, you can't rest, you are confused, you're lost and it doesn't get better at all... or spiral out and curves turn to straight lines, you settle on one of the infinite possibilities of infinitely long lines you feel comfortable, sure, stable you think you got it all but you too are lost, you can't see anything other than your line...
And everything else is in between
So where should i go now? Can i escape from this? What if it's a hyper-dimensional spiral?
Surrender is the only solution i have, the word surrender is not the right word here, استسلام is the right word, in it there is the word peace it's like "peaceing" (i'm not so sure about that) it's when you surrender not because you are losing and not to avoid more losses but you surrender to peace in the middle of a hard situation, when you're angry... even if you're winning because you know peace is the only true form of winning

this is near about random (apologies Sakka), but spiralling incenses from sea shell trapdoor (shiva eye) came to mind, since we did not want to discuss the other.... but since your names is connected with 'carries water'......

As incense material:



As sea gem beads:




We do like to commemorate certain events/thoughts by introducing a new beads to our colour tesbih sets which are not limited to 99 beads...after all we are not a very well sorted person Intezam ran out of intelligent & smart......

intezam your tangents are lucid to begin, quickly spiralling into my brain as I read until I truly get lost.

Thank you Intezam reading anything from you makes me happy i recently did an A/B extraction from a wild kind of thyme and i was thinking about making incense so this was good info

You can slay the dragon or you can tame it.
I want to tame it.
I want to live on the energy of the beasts inside me
I want to love them.
They are what i got and i won't run away from myself.
I love my body, i love my soul, i love myself in all my forms.
When my body refuses the medicine i ask it gently to accept and it obeys.
When my mind rejects the true knowledge i'm receiving i tell it it's allright and it calms.
I ask and i get what i ask for what can be greater than this.
I'm happy and i'm in pain.
I see this pain in what i ask for, i should accept it too.
I ask for my heart to be filled with love, pure love, god's love and i receive, the pain in my heart is necessary for me to feel love because love is accepting the good and the bad, i ask for eternal love but life is good and bad eternal love is loving both.
I ask to speak the word of truth, the word of good, the word of wisdom, the word that can penetrate to any heart and make it feel good and ease its pain, and this is what i get, I speak and my word is good but I'm scared i'm scared of talking i'm scared that others are not ready to hear i'm scared to interfere in their path... i'm just living this contradictions right now, i don't know what to say here, silence seems to be the answer but i want you to feel good i want to help you i want to share my energy with you because i need your energy too.... i fail to say anything more i just believe that you understand because you're alive and wide awake too.
I ask to see, to see under the surface to see through people to see their insides like an open book so i can understand them and help them and what i get is a mirror, everything becomes a mirror that reflects myself everything i do, i say, i think ... gets reflected back to me, and this is not just a reflection it's that what they are emitting is the same as i am emitting, i see god in everything in me and in others and in nature and everything
And finally i ask for my mind, body, soul, self... whatever is the mixture that forms me to work in perfect harmony and here i see everything is fighting inside me there's nowhere i feel safe inside... the thing is that i'm already working in perfect harmony there's nothing i can do to achieve harmony but to surrender to peace, trying to balance things by adding more weights and hoping for the weights to cancel out is stupid, the scale is infinitely accurate and stability can only be achieved by removing all weights.
I'm lost i don't know anything really.
I have three things i want to say:
I'm sorry.
Thank you.
I love you.

I feel as if you can think as though Wonder and Astonishment in the unknown is your home, then you are never really "lost."

Sure, you are lost somewhere within infinity, but that's precisely where you are comfortable, that's simply where you want to be- Now.

You're right Gonzukes i can't find meaning in life if i'm not lost, being lost seems the opposite of what i said that there's no meaning but only when i'm deeply lost in paradoxes i learn. I don't feel comfortable when i'm lost but that moment when inspiration comes on me is so beautiful and satisfying...
I realised that paradoxes are what makes us alive, when you understand something you get over it fast and life gets boring and loses meaning but paradoxes are something that you can never surpass you can never solve and the deeper you sink the more you learn and you can't solve it and you keep going... nobody knows anything, the prophet was deeply lost in the paradoxical relationship between god and human and he got inspired, the quran came on him, the proof of how lost(how we also should be) he was is that in how many ways you can understand the verses of the quran and his sayings, opposition is everywhere in them, the same verse can be understood in multiple and opposite meanings and it's also in the names of god (99 names) al-rahman, al-rahim, al-tawwab, al-aafou al-ghafour... meaning he's the ultimate forgiver and al-3adl, al-hassib, al-raqib.... meaning he's the ultimate punisher (punish is not a good word but English is not good when it comes to meaning) no right will be lost, and there is al-nafe3 (the good) al-dar (the bad) and many more... of course this can be understood in many ways where it appears there is no contradiction but god is omnipotent and the ultimate and it's unreasonable for two opposites like good and bad to be ultimately present in the same things....
And prophet mohamed said "forgive me god for i couldn't truly understand you" and he's supposed to be the one that understood god the most but again the beauty of the paradoxical life is that you cannot surpass it.

I tend to feel that being lost is really a practical term, as in you cannot truly be lost if you aren't intent on a destination. When a cow meanders, they are not lost. They only get lost if they try to find the trough or the stable and don't.

I feel similarly about paradoxes. They seem, to me, to be a conflation of Ontology with Reality (or in any case, the Map for the Territory...)

Personally, the only times I feel lost are when I cannot find what I'm looking for, be it a place or a piece of information. Sometimes I feel "lost" when charting new personal territory, but that's less being/feeling lost to me, and more simply being unfamiliar.

This is all relative to my experience, and I wouldn't want to diminish someone else' personal experience by simply responding "lol, ur not lost!".

Of course, when it comes to Islam, the only real intimate knowledge I have (or something close to intimate, at least) is with Sufi. And by and large, I think you can take the "Wisdom of the Idiots" as they call it, and not truly need the Quran. By the same token, I feel the same about most Big Box religions, and their "mystical" counterparts.

Of course, as well, I'm a very inconsistent person when it comes to me opinions. They come and go with the tides, in a sense.

Maybe "lost" as a more philosophical term of continously stripping off all illusory concepts and living the unkown mystery, now. "Lost" as a form of transcending, let go of mindfulness and flow in the now, know nothing, be everything.


"I got totally lost in the game..."


On the other hand, how can someone can get lost at all? Was there ever a beginning?

tseuq

never surrender.
reinforcements are either on the way or not.
sometimes the choppers show up and your saved.
if not, go down gracefully with conviction.

if captured alive,
still dont surrender.
captors will beat you up of course,
but they will still respect ya.

surrender implies you accept being beaten.
never.

I'm not lost, I know exactly where I am.

I'm right here.

Blessings
~ND

Well lost in its simple meaning is exactly how i felt when i wrote the op but change is happening so fast and i don't feel like that anymore at least what i know now is that what i feel at this moment will not last because that's what it means to be alive it will keep changing and i should not look at things from the perspective of now, i'm so scared of eternity i'm so scared that this will not end that i will not arrive but when i'm in that plain where the illusion of time is cleared i won't be scared of eternity, i chose wondering and going with the flow not deciding anything and not trying to accomplish anything but it was all because i believed that this way i will arrive so sometimes i feel very lost..
i'm a muslim but don't know much about islam, i hated it for long but now i respect it i respect the prophet because i feel that he was true with himself and whatever was his experience he didn't run away from it, from himself, he sat and listened to the voices he was hearing and believed in the angels he was seeing. i will never force anything on myself i will never force a verse of the quran on myself, my intention is clear i want the truth if the quran is true it will come on me too i believe in my own experience and i don't mind if at the end it's the same as mohamad's. i don't want to define myself to limit myself.
When i'm in deep pain an endless pain that i don't know where it's coming from i surrender because i see how i don't know anything how i can't even understand why i'm in pain or how to end it so i just surrender and so far each time i do that i learn something i don't know where it comes from it just appears and i feel good again...

Under two old pine trees i sit thinking about the mystery of life and the mystery of my personal existence, why am i like this? Why do i feel that nobody else is like me?
i lived for long thinking of life as what i read about it but since i started exploring life, experiencing feelings and learning about myself, i feel again that i am different and alone in my existence, i can't find anywhere anything that describes what i feel and i cannot even describe it so maybe others too cannot describe it and that's why i can't find anything about it but i look at those trees and how every year each one produces around a 100 pine cones and in each cone there is around a 100 seed so in total around 20000 seed are born or maybe less i don't care and those trees are 40 years old and of that enormous number of these born seeds not a single one survived and became a tree, many of them are eaten and many sprout but die rapidly of the harshness of life, they were all born all were given the chance but none of them dared to continue and fulfil it's destiny of becoming a glorious pine tree, but trees exist meaning that some seeds on rare occasions grow and maybe the reason why i feel so different is that i am one of those special seeds that will become a tree.
I'm still a very young green sprout, a bit contradictory but i feel i'm not alone there is a lot of trees, forests bigger than my country so i'm not alone and i'm very thankful to the trees that are holding me, protecting me from the burning sun, forming bonds with my roots sharing energy, helping me believe in myself and grow stronger...

When a text-block rectangle manifests without spacings, it spooks the community and some will be unable to read it

I'm lost. Coming in on the tight end of the spiral. Or at least tighter than ive been before. Like I could know where the center is.

I suppose if we weren't lost there would be nothing to do.

Perhaps paradox is the sharpening stone of the universe.

You're not alone in how you feel, at least in the question of if you are alone in how you feel.

I think I would find more people that were like me if it were not for my inability to articulate my thoughts and feelings accurately. I am quite aware of the the under average communication skills I have, and even with having above average I don't know how effective I would be.

If my commincaton skills were perfect, I may find everyone feels just like me, just with different language.

Of course you are different, we are all (excuse the cliché like snowflakes not one being identical to another.

But I get you, trust that I get you. It makes me feel better if you do.

Sorry about this nonsensical rambling. Almost deleted it all but what the heck, I need to keep sharpening the blade.