I have been putting of my changa session for the last few weeks. I recently made a non toxic mhrb extraction (q21q21/dlimo/fasi/slow H2O crystalized).It was combined with an almost white harmala extract from rue. This was boiled in IPA and caapi leaf was added with a pinch of damiana in a 1:1 ratio.
I have had an enormous amount of work the last 3 months, saving for a long summer road trip with my wife and 4 kids. As i write we are on the road. Needless to say the stress has been high. I have spent the last few days finishing work, getting the house and garden in order, packing and when i have had the time I was way too exhausted to follow through. This morning I awoke at dawn and my intuition said "now is the time".
I went out to the Tipi at the garden's edge and sat down with the bubbler. The onset was slow. As the trees took on a new presence I could feel the spirits wanted me to move. the heavy body load of the harmalas wanted me to resist. I felt covered in cobwebs and netting, this was an illusion imposed by the changa. It told me i was trapping myself from the experience by staying where i was. I stood up and wobbled toward the garden and aha! The happy plants greeted me almost like they were waving their foliage. I moved into its center and sat in lotus. all of my anxiety and stress was lifted in a bath of loving energy. My plants were loving me and shimmering light into my soul. Tears of joy steamed from my eyes. The sky above appeared like the ocean suface viewed fron below inundated with angelic forms just above gazing down at me. I went deeply into prayer, naming aloud people I often take for granted in the day to day grind and difficult people who challenge my patience. As their names left my lips tears of gratitude for their presence cleansed my eyes.
Yesterday I had attended a ceremony honoring a man, Elbert Williams, who was slain 75 years ago for trying to organize an NAACP chapter in his small town. With recent events I began to pray for victims of violence AND the perpetrators with the example of Milarepa in mind. He was once a warlord and sorceror who became a revered Buddhist monk. i prayed the murderer in Charleston to be able to see his own atrocity for what it is and change his heart. Even if it happens it will not change the past but he could lift others out of that dark path before they let ignorance and murder into their own hearts. Wishing death upon evil people is the easy thing to do. Praying for them to become enlightened is much much harder.
I returned from that place into my sunlight and aura filled garden, the spirit filled sky and felt so much hope. The dread of leaving home fell away and the excitement came over me as i walked amongst my babies, speaking them and thanking them for what they do for me.
Marijuana, LSD, psilocybin, and DMT they all changed the way I see
But love's the only thing that ever saved my life - Sturgill Simpson "Turtles all the Way Down"
Why am I here?