Greetings everyone, this is my introductory essay.

I am a 45 year old male. I have a moderate amount of experience with psychedelics. In my youth age 16-20 I took LSD perhaps 100 times. The cumulative effect of this was life changing and informs my worldview, beliefs, and sense of humor to this day. I also took a few dozen Psycilocybin trips and 3 MDMA experiences. Of course I have smoked a fair amount of cannabis and its derivatives. I have smoked cannabis about once a month or so for the past year, but have not taken any psychedelics in 20 years.

In my youth we knew about DMT, but it was mysterious and legendary. I was always very interested in it, but no one I knew had ever seen, much less taken it. This was before the Internet, so information was not that easy to come by. I always wanted to try it, the short duration and high intensity were appealing at the time.

In the past year or so I have felt drawn once again to psychedelics. A stranger in a random conversation referenced DMT, I enquires and he offered to procure some for me. I refused, but my interest was sparked. A few searches brought me here. I lurked for quite awhile. My wife encouraged me to do an extraction. I used Cyb's tek with 50g ACRB. I got decent, if a little dirty results. Thanks Cyb! I smoked once, about 10mg. I was totally blown away by the intense come up. I got some minor visuals and some heavenly distortion of music. The intensity of the body rush really has given me pause. I am working up my nerve to take another journey, and the time is almost at hand.

Due to my comfortable and beautiful life situation, the paranoia leading up to the extraction was intense. I was certain prison was just around the corner. I admi to some lingering paranoia, even as I post this.

I must admit I have been very impressed by the obvious intelligence and care that is plainly seen all over this site and forum. It is impressive and totally unlike other forums, whatever their focus. I look forward to easing into more active participation.

Thank you!

welcome to the nexus

Yeah, the intensity is abrupt, cascading, gains momentum as time goes on. It can be off-putting for some, especially during those initial stage of the experience. Sometimes that rising tide gives way; sometimes it just keep escalating and escalating until you think "no, i've had enough, i can't handle anymore"; and yet it keeps going.

The experience is more powerful than we could ever imagine...

Awesome that you followed through with your own extraction! That's the way to do it if your going to; you build not just a relationship with the experience itself but also the entire process leading up to, which in itself is an awesome experience. The paranoia will fade. Many here have been through what you have. Definitely work your way up, no need to rush. 5mg increments works fairly well. This experience will dish out as much as you can handle (and then some ).

Once again, welcome to the nexus. <3

Thanks for the welcome and encouragement!

I like your description of the come-up. After the second hit I said "oh hush" and immediately laid down. I told my wife " I felt like I was strapped onto the front of a speeding train!" I suppose can get used to it with repeated exposure.

I very much enjoyed the extraction process (-the paranoia). I felt like I learned a lot and could greatly improve the efficiency and overall results if I do it again. The extraction experience alone has been worth the admission price, so to speak.

Thanks again!

We have very similar psychedelic histories. I agree with everything Tat said. Creating the spice in your life is a unique experience.

I have been thinking a lot about the fear thing and DMT. A part of me thinks that the fear is coming from the ego who is afraid of it's existence being blown to bits. Another way I look at it is that fear is part of the lesson. Letting go of fear and finding courage.

There is a way to change fear. Look at it. What is it? Excitement is a form of fear. Just before you get on a roller coaster you fill with excitement. The line moves slowly and you slowly approach the cars. You line up and soon enough it's your turn to get in. You chose the front this time. Your heart is pounding as the cars clink and clank up the steep incline. Slowly coming to the top and AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! Hands up and the fear is released into an unexplainable joy and exhilaration!

DMT is the same way if you look at it that way. If you have fearful apprehension so much that it is affecting your trips, making them difficult, then take a break until you can start to enjoy getting in line for the ride again.