Hi all, I've come across a very odd predicament I found myself in today. First, some background knowledge:
I've had more experience with dissociatives than I have actual psychedelics, I was big into DXM in my younger and dumber years and I used once a week. Later I moved onto things like Ketamine and MXE, and I even had an experience with 3-MeO-PCP at one point in time. My experience with psychedelics has been smarter, I don't use nearly as often as I used to use dissociatives. in fact I don't really use DIS anymore at this point, as I've lost interest. I've tried my fair share of research chemicals, plenty of 25x and 2c-x, had DOM a few times as well. LSD and Mushrooms remain my favorite but I can't wait to see what Mescaline and DMT can offer me.
Now, the problem: my uncle who was also a psychonaut before he died wrote a book on my family's history. Things like how they managed to escape the Soviet regime in the 50's while actually being related to Gennady Burbulis who was effectively Boris Yeltsin's right hand man. I was turning the pages and he focused a lot more on who my ancestors were as people. What they were like. What they loved. I was shocked to discover that many people in my family were diagnosed with mild-moderate schizophrenia. The two most recent people to have it were my grandmother and second cousin on my mother's side.
This strongly worries me because I'm aware that psychedelic use while being predisposed to mental disorders is a big no-no. I realize I have to completely cease or very, very, very carefully monitor any and all use.
My question to you all is this: is it worth the risk, in your opinion, to continue my use of psychedelics? Just yesterday I was eager to dive into the world of psychedelia in my future as I grew with age, and now I find myself anxious and afraid. Truly I'm just looking for a second opinion and a fresh set of eyes in my situation. I've been nervous and not thinking clearly while kicking myself in the ass for not investigating this sooner.