DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 11 Joined: 28-Jan-2014 Last visit: 15-Feb-2015 Location: England
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So my last relationship on the first date she asked me "Do you do drugs?" I was straight up honest and told her about DMT and it blew her mind but not in a good way. She had never heard of it and it scared her and wasn't interested in learning anything about it.
I went on a date recently and I was asked the same question to which I lied and said no. I feel bad for lying about it but I'm not sure when/if I should tell someone I'm in a relationship or dating... How do you go about doing it? When should I do it?
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 lettuce
Posts: 1077 Joined: 26-Mar-2012 Last visit: 15-Jan-2016 Location: Far, Far Away
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There's no special timing for being up front with folks... always is the time. Why get ten dates into it and then unleash a possible deal-breaker? I probably don't have to tell you that dishonesty isn't the answer. I wouldn't necessarily get a t-shirt made up saying "Yes, I'm on dope" and wear it on your dates, but when the topic comes up, be forthcoming. You're dating to ultimately find a partner somewhere along the line I would assume, no sense in that starting on shakey ground. Much Love and Good Luck Pup TentacleYou are precisely as big as what you love and precisely as small as what you allow to annoy you.Robert Anton WilsonMushroom Greenhouse How-ToI'm no pro but I know a a few things - always willing to help with Psilocybe cubensis cultivation questions.
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DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 11 Joined: 28-Jan-2014 Last visit: 15-Feb-2015 Location: England
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Yea' very good advice, thank you 
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DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 111 Joined: 12-Oct-2014 Last visit: 21-Jul-2016
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Yeah, I've been wondering about the same thing recently. How to find someone that is OK with occasional spiritual/recreational drug use? My best guess is to go to the psychedelic events and try to find someone that lives near you.
That's what I really want. I don't want a relationship if I'm going to have to hide my occasional usage. It's really not much, but I value it too much, and I'd rather be myself than that.
I've never had a date ask me that though. I look different/unusual, like a Steve Buscemi or Michael Shannon, so I don't get many dates, and they usually go nowhere. (Girls are mostly looking for "tall, dark, and handsome", and in rare cases I might be considered the last.) The best luck I've ever had was with alternative people who tend to be more open minded, but at my age they have all been sucked into conformity.
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 DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 131 Joined: 20-Dec-2014 Last visit: 20-Mar-2018
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For most people you'd run into, their reaction could be affected by how you bring it up. There are certain things that bring up a mental image that won't work in your favor. For one thing the word "DMT" sounds a lot more sinister than it really is to people who don't know better. I'm not suggesting you lie to your date but if you started explaining it maybe talk about it in terms of the plant material (mimosa, acacia, etc.) and the extracts of these plants until you can convince her of how it is fairly harmless. Have you ever done Salvia? Maybe that's a good way to start the conversation, it's legal (mostly), she's more likely to know a bit about it, it's a plant, and it doesn't have a menacing name. If her reaction is good, you could work DMT into the conversation by comparing it to salvia and explaining how it is "pretty much the same" (from a plant, no real chance of OD, non-addictive, intense brief trip, you smoke it, etc...). It's all about the delivery. Unless she's hardcore anti-drugs, in which case if you want to have a relationship you'll either have to quit, or hide it for the whole time. You'd have to ask yourself what's important to you. If you're not looking to get into a relationship and it's just a casual date, it's your call about what she does and doesn't need to know. You don't have to spill your life story (especially the illegal parts) to everyone you meet. Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. He wasn't there again today, I wish, I wish he'd go away.
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DMT-Nexus member

Posts: 4612 Joined: 17-Jan-2009 Last visit: 07-Mar-2024
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DarkLotus wrote:
I went on a date recently and I was asked the same question to which I lied and said no. I feel bad for lying about it but I'm not sure when/if I should tell someone I'm in a relationship or dating... How do you go about doing it? When should I do it?
If they don't accept your lifestyle/hobbies, then move along. Lying about it will eventually come back to bite you; always does. Just speak as honestly as you can with her, explaining/educating in a proper manner. If she doesn't take, then move along. I"ve always been of the type that im not going to mold myself around someone else. Having to cut ties with parts of yourself that make you 'you', in hopes of gaining traction in said relationship, never ends good - in some way, shape or form. Hope this helps <3
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 xͭ͆͝͏̮͔̜t̟̬̦̣̟͉͈̞̝ͣͫ͞,̡̼̭̘̙̜ͧ̆̀̔ͮ́ͯͯt̢̘̬͓͕̬́ͪ̽́s̢̜̠̬̘͖̠͕ͫ͗̾͋͒̃͛̚͞ͅ
Posts: 1716 Joined: 23-Apr-2012 Last visit: 23-Jan-2017
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It's about phrasing I guess: * No, but I'm researching neurotransmitters and I'm interested in chemistry/pharmacology. * Sure, I do drugs 24/7. Have a problem with it?
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 yes
Posts: 1808 Joined: 29-Jan-2010 Last visit: 05-May-2025 Location: in the universe
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lying is a good option yet this choice is for the individual to decide illusions !, there are no illusions there is only that which is the truth
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 DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 989 Joined: 27-Dec-2014 Last visit: 17-Feb-2024
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Not a drug, it's a plant teacher for which you are a student of.
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 Psychonautical engineer
Posts: 92 Joined: 10-Jan-2012 Last visit: 14-Feb-2019
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I waited a while before I told my girlfriend(now wife  ). We both had a few drinks in us at the time so made it easier. She actually found it really interesting. She's too scared to take the plunge but sits for me while I'm off with fairies, it's great! When I try to explain the experience to her though she's all like "oh god.. here we go..", but apart from that it's all good! Wish I could get her to breakthrough “Psychedelics are illegal not because a loving government is concerned that you may jump out of a third story window. Psychedelics are illegal because they dissolve opinion structures and culturally laid down models of behaviour and information processing. They open you up to the possibility that everything you know is wrong.” – Terence McKenna
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 DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 970 Joined: 01-Dec-2012 Last visit: 01-Mar-2024
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Imho, one thing which is important to get into peoples minds is to differentiate between using drugs and abusing drugs. Everything is always okay in the end, if it's not, then it's not the end.
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 DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 14191 Joined: 19-Feb-2008 Last visit: 06-Feb-2025 Location: Jungle
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If the relationship is to last and psychedelics are so important to you, I think you have to tell the person.
Personally I find ayahuasca a much easier substance to talk to people about and 'open the door' rather than DMT or other psychedelics. People seem more open to 'indigenous medicinal plant that gives you visions and help you grow as a person' than a 'potent psychedelic that you smoke as a freebase and see self-dribbling basketball elves'.
I've had a gf that was against these substances and it was really a strain on my life, all the resistance I faced. Even if the person doesnt do it, they should accept your own decisions if it doesnt hurt them (and if you are mantaining your health and showing them it's doing you good)
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 Psychonautical engineer
Posts: 92 Joined: 10-Jan-2012 Last visit: 14-Feb-2019
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steppa wrote:Imho, one thing which is important to get into peoples minds is to differentiate between using drugs and abusing drugs. Ah, very true. IME lately it seems as soon as someone knows your interested in any sort of drug or chemical they immediately label you a "druggie". I tend to keep it all to myself, but even I sometimes start to think "am I a druggie?". Of course I'm not, what makes me any worse than someone that spends all their money on alcohol or whatever.. “Psychedelics are illegal not because a loving government is concerned that you may jump out of a third story window. Psychedelics are illegal because they dissolve opinion structures and culturally laid down models of behaviour and information processing. They open you up to the possibility that everything you know is wrong.” – Terence McKenna
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 Another Leaf on the Vine
Posts: 554 Joined: 29-Jul-2013 Last visit: 26-Aug-2023
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⬆︎⬆︎⬆︎⬆︎⬆︎ Rainforest, healing, entheogen, & soul are all much more appealing concepts than..."I know it looks like a crack-pipe but trust me...!" [Door-slam, 911-call] “I sometimes marvel at how far I’ve come - blissful, even, in the knowledge that I am slowly becoming a well-evolved human being - only to have the illusion shattered by an episode of bad behaviour that contradicts the new and reinforces the old. At these junctures of self-reflection, I ask the question: “are all my years of hard work unraveling before my eyes, or am I just having an episode?” For the sake of personal growth and the pursuit of equanimity, I choose the latter and accept that, on this journey of evolution, I may not encounter just one bad day, but a group of many.” ― B.G. Bowers
ॐ
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 DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 156 Joined: 05-Oct-2014 Last visit: 07-Jun-2018 Location: Cardiff
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currently in a situation of my own akin to this, I wonder if I suffer alone,
I found DMT after my relationship started, My current gf has smoked and on occasions smokes a little cannabis with me but nothing more.
a friend introduced me to DMT, my gf knows about it and has smoke a bit in a joint (knowingly) but said she didn't like it, however from what was in the joint i know she was just saying this because it was a class a drug and she compared it to heroin!
I've been honest with her, she doesn't like it she has accepted it but has asked me many times if she were to make me choose between her and DMT what would i choose.
Now my gf is not the type of laid back girl, she is insecure and crazy, if you've seen the crazy hot scale (found here if you havent) she's about about a 9 hot but but about an 8 crazy. she didnt take it to well when i explained how much it meant to me and that if she can't respect my feelings and beliefs like I do hers then we would have to go our separate ways.
I sometimes wish I had found DMT prior to any relationship because it is a huge part of who I am now.
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 Another Leaf on the Vine
Posts: 554 Joined: 29-Jul-2013 Last visit: 26-Aug-2023
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spawn9076 wrote:she has asked me many times if she were to make me choose between her and DMT what would i choose. It's DMT today, but could well be your friends/family next week... “I sometimes marvel at how far I’ve come - blissful, even, in the knowledge that I am slowly becoming a well-evolved human being - only to have the illusion shattered by an episode of bad behaviour that contradicts the new and reinforces the old. At these junctures of self-reflection, I ask the question: “are all my years of hard work unraveling before my eyes, or am I just having an episode?” For the sake of personal growth and the pursuit of equanimity, I choose the latter and accept that, on this journey of evolution, I may not encounter just one bad day, but a group of many.” ― B.G. Bowers
ॐ
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 DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 156 Joined: 05-Oct-2014 Last visit: 07-Jun-2018 Location: Cardiff
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Its not really a point of I need to use DMT, its more of my beliefs towards it. I can accept her terms of being an atheist without a problem and I won't try and convince her otherwise.
but I will and always be open and honest with what I believe and why. I like to share information with people close friends and close family and let them decide some of my family and friends don't understand but they respect my views without a problem. I do believe it is a subject that should be approached with caution.
but as an intimate relationship it is definitely something you should be honest about. you will not build a mutually trusting relationship otherwise. treat others how you would like to be treated.
In terms of telling people about doing drugs I would go on the notion of what everyone else has mention, perhaps mentioning it is basically ayahuasca and explain about the shamans etc. but at the end of the day you'd like to find some who is compatible
another point to make out would that DMT is found naturally in your body anyway, and that these experiences are essentially available to anyone without the use of the drug and it is basically a short cut for people who don't want to take the time and dedication to master meditation techniques.
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 DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 788 Joined: 18-Nov-2011 Last visit: 24-Sep-2024
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Man From Chan Chan wrote:Rainforest, healing, entheogen, & soul are all much more appealing concepts than..."I know it looks like a crack-pipe but truuuuuuuuuuuust me...!" (u's added for emphasis) LOL, i had to login just to comment this one. So true. Well done, well done This is the time to really find out who you are and enjoy every moment you have. Take advantage of it.
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I compulsively post from time to time
Posts: 1123 Joined: 27-Apr-2011 Last visit: 16-Jan-2024
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Lol, I am considering getting the molecule tattooed on my Neck. Mostly when someone ur dating asks if "you do drugs" they have bad experiences with drug-addiction. And they want to make sure. Thread carefully. Just make up wise words.
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 DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 788 Joined: 18-Nov-2011 Last visit: 24-Sep-2024
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Infectedstyle wrote:Lol, I am considering getting the molecule tattooed on my Neck Police magnet This is the time to really find out who you are and enjoy every moment you have. Take advantage of it.
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