Hello all, I'm going to tell you about my experience with psychedelics and why I want to go to the next level.
After smoking marijuana for quite a while, I decided I should quit because it was making me too lazy and unmotivated, so I decided for some reason that for the next month, I would "go out with a bang" and then quit. Besides weed, I tried things like molly (never want to try it again lol), dabs (I know it's still THC but at least to me it's much different than just smoking some weed), dimenhydrinate I think it was called (this one was the worst, it made me see delirious hallucinations like spiders and I had to sleep with the lights on), and finally shrooms. I had about 4 grams of I think baeocystis my first time. It was insanely different from anything else I had taken. I remember certain visuals so clearly, but not much else. Shortly after I quit weed and all other drugs.
A few months later, I thought to myself "Psychedelics aren't addictive or (directly) harmful, so I guess it wouldn't hurt to try it again.", and so I did. Me and 2 friends acquired mushrooms but didn't know how much it looked like, and guessed 12 grams.
We went to a friend's house and ate shrooms, then smoked weed (I only did it because I heard it makes you have a calmer trip... Boy was I wrong.) and waited. As we came up, everyone else acted like they were drunk and high, looking at mirrors, laughing really loud, and killing my vibe... I just wanted to chill out and get absorbed into the visuals. Later they blasted music loud and yelled and laughed at everything, and from there my trip sunk like a torpedo.
The two sober sitters were getting curious, and asked if they could have the rest of my shrooms and kept asking so I gave in and said yea. My trip was so bad I just wanted to get rid of the shrooms. They called people over and shared the shrooms and next thing I know, it was a party. I felt weird and said I was gonna go sleep. While laying down, because everyone was so loud, the neighbours called and threatened to call the cops, and everyone kept saying the word "cops" at least 20 times and my trip plummeted even more. They didn't get quieter either.
At that point, I left my body, and things went insane. I saw tons of crazy visuals, and later on was from hearing cops so much, I thought they showed up and that we were getting arrested... for some reason I went from thinking cops showed to the house was now on fire, but I couldn't move... I then went to my body was separated in pieces and I couldn't move and I was convinced my life had ended, and I would spend the rest of an eternity in that bed in pieces. My friend pulled the covers off me and I felt as if I had emerged from a cacoon as a brand new person, and my mind felt like it had been erased and it was blank. I had nothing on my mind for the next hour and apparently I just kept saying "what the fuck just happened".
I later on found out we had 28 grams. I figure I ate 5 - 6 grams.
Anyways, for 5 years I had myself convinced I wanted to be an electronic music producer, and as a hobby to kill time, I sometimes mess with Photoshop and cinema 4d. After that trip, I have no desire for producing music, and now I want to get better at graphic design and recreate some of the things I saw.
After finding out about DMT, I think of it as a double edged sword. I felt great when I emerged from my cocoon as a brand new me, and I felt like my whole ego had changed, but 2 days later, I went back to the old me. I want to explore my mind, go back to my blank slate mind, and come up with new ideas for my artwork, so I can show everyone some of the crazy things I've seen.
Thanks for reading this and I hope to become more active and contribute more to the DMT nexus in the coming weeks as I commence my journey into hyperspace.
