hi there,

well, the first time I've ever heard about DMT was about a month ago. I watched a video about the spirit molecule. from there I did some digging on the Internet and came across this website. I was surprised at how long this has been around for and what people have been experiencing. I feel like this is something that I have been looking for for a long time. I don't have much experience with drugs except for marijuana, LSD and shrooms. although I am a bit afraid of what I may experience on DMT I am very very excited to experience Something that cannot be explained. I am hoping that this may be a breaking point for me and that DMT may shake me to a certain extent awake. one major concern I have about doing DMT is the fact that I have a family and it may be perceived as something that it is not. I do not want anybody to think that I am a druggie. Or somebody who abuses drugs in anyway. I feel that after the research and I've done so far this is something I would like to do but I feel like it will be very hard to explain to anybody does not have the information. if there is anybody out there that has a family with children and could offer up any advice that might help me and my situation I would be very grateful to hear it. I am planning to take my first trip with DMT in about a month and a half from now. I am planning an extraction of MHRB soon. I'm excited to go forward with this and I just don't want to be looked at as a bad family man, father, husband. thank you for letting me be a part of this and for all the information that I've been able to gather thus far.

Thanks for listening.
Im almostthere

I have done DMT with my son around but this was after 40 trips or so... It takes some time to behave like a human being while on it. My family went totally crazy about it, my mom wanted to take him away from me. But I'm a passionate psychedelic defender - I never hide what I do, because I don't consider it a crime. But prepare for some battles... People never take this lightly because they intuitively know it is the scariest thing out there. They sense that it could blow their mind and shoot their world to pieces, so they prefer to just say this is a drug and it's bad.

Talk to your wife, this is important. You will not get away with it, if you do it, because it will change you for good and you will want to discuss it with her. So make sure she knows what psychedelics are, talk it through a 1000 times, if you have to.

almostthere, welcome to the nexus,

Take a look at the link in my signature to the Open Hyperspace Traveler Handbook. You might find some information there that can help you explain psychedelics to your family and make them see that one can use them in a responsible way and that it doesn't have to have anythign to do with being a "druggy".

It can be quite a challenge to get people to understand this however. Lots of people are very scared of psychedelics for many reasons, the main one being the amount of demonization and misinfromatin out there. You should definitely talk to your closest family members about this and in the end you have to respect their wishes too, if they don't want to have you extract at home or things like that.

Good luck.

Hello almostthere,

Welcome to the Nexus.

Your situation is not an easy one. You are going against generations of lies and deep cultural programming, things that are almost as ingrained as breathing for most folks (these ignorant attitudes).

I am a married woman but without kids, so really I do not know . . . . .but having admitted that, I suspect it might be like anything fascinating/hobbylike but plus.

Think about enjoying football. Wow, football is awesome. Are you the kind of family man who will now set aside all previous priorities to take up football? Will you quit your job to join an amateur league, insist your kids with no interest in the sport sign up, spend every single free moment watching, reading about and researching games? Or will you be the kind of man who keeps it in perspective? Who understands that for various reasons perhaps football not only isn't the thing of your family members, but actually holds no interest for them at all. Thus, they perceive it as a toxic element removing you from them. . . . .Toxic and potentially dangerous - not only might you get injured, but you are no longer engaged as a husband or father.

I think the way to handle this if at all possible is to discuss football infrequently, to limit one's football exposure, to educate loved ones about concerns (the padding and rules helps to prevent a lot of injuries or w/e) if/when they are willing to listen.

Sure this is all silly analogy, but I think there may be something to this. Of ourse football isn't schedule I. Thus, one would have to be very careful to reassure adult loved ones and to limit exposure to these conversations of very young children.

DMT tends to get folks obsessed. Few things are as intense, as profound, as balls/ovaries to the wall as DMT. It feels absolutely life changing. I think the key is to remember that even after such a crazy experience that nothing in one's everyday life has changed at all.

Yours is not an easy path, but I applaud you nonetheless. I do hope you will keep us posted.

Warm Regards,
Pandora

Hey there!

It can be difficult to explain the reasoning behind what we do to people who are not interested, or involved. I am a married man, and my wife is not interested or involved with DMT. It's been about 10 months since it's first come into our lives, and there have been many phases of understanding and misunderstanding each other that has taken place.

When I first tried it, I was baffled. Blown away. I wanted to talk about it with my wife, but she could not relate. No matter what I said, or how I described it, the discussions failed. I started changing many things about myself. These rapid changes were difficult for her to deal with at first. Instead of watching tv, I wanted to have a philosophical conversation. Instead of sleeping all day, I wanted to get up and go do things. I started getting more cautious about what I ate. I did talk about some jibber-jabber nonsense from time to time.... But, Damn! The stuff is profound! It makes the mind wander. I wanted to bring up topics that normally aren't part of a casual conversation.

It all happened so quickly that she thought I was loosing it. But, when she saw that there was no going back - and I produced good results in school and work - then she gave way to her insecurities about it. She still won't try it, but it is no longer a sore subject.

Hi everyone,

I want to thank you all for the advise and let you know I will be working up to this. At this point I have a lot of research to do before I bring it up in a serious way to my wife. from the subtle hints that I've tried to give already I can tell that she is not very receptive to this idea and will need some convincing. my plan is to research on this forum and with the help of you guys put together some kind of plan that I can somewhat present to my wife as far as the pros of DMT. I guess the main reason why I want to try DMT is because of this constant feeling I've always had that there is something more to consciousness and to life than what we are proceeding. From the experiences that they have red bow so far it is exactly what I am looking for. if anybody has any kind of information that I might be able to digest and tell my wife in my own way how it will benefit me please post it.

thanks everyone for listening

Your position is not an easy one.

I think honesty and a tortise attitude (slow and steady to get to the goal, no need to rush) are important. Absolutely do not lie or sneak around when it comes to this issue and your wife.

Hopefully you two still communicate. I don't mean talk in front of the kids. I mean sit down and really communicate soul to soul, being honest and not hiding information or feelings, not even by ommission. . . . Hopefully you two still know how to LISTEN to each other. You want and need her to listen (if not understand) at this point, so of course you will have to listen to her concerns also.

Make sure she knows that your love for her and your family remain unchanged as you search for philosophical and metaphysical answers . . . If she (and you) are embracers of Abrahamic religions, you might just say you want to get closer to the real God or Godhead and that church activities seem very removed/distant in the current era.

I would encourage you to read "DMT The Spirit Molecule" by Strassman. Then see if you can interest her in reading it. Or maybe read a few passages out loud that interest you. There is a movie with the same title (it's even on Netflix). As is typical, the book is SO much better, but maybe preview the movie and if you think she won't be completely alienated, try to watch it together.

Be honest about your feelings. Let your wife know she can feed your every need, she is the key to every door that opens on a mystery or answer, except for these issues. That you love her as always and that it is not that you are looking for something more or different, but that rather, you are seeking a different angle than the usual one for these philosophical/religious/metaphysical concerns.


Another thing you could do is research the history of drugs and drug scheduling and share some of that ugliness with her. Make sure she knows that most drugs were scheduled due to nothing other than hate, racism, ignorance and fear. It is a very ugly story, but folks should understand the truth of it.

And finally, reassure constantly that you are not going to re-live The Summer of Love. That you are not an 18 year old hippy trying to escape his parents and The Establishment. Rather you are a man calmly and methodically seeking some deeper answers while remaining firmly ensconced within the framework of his everyday life and loves.

Warm Regards,
Pandora

I sad down
I set down with my wife last night to have a little talk. I wanted to let her know that I have some interest in this subject matter and that I would like to do some research on it. I told her depending on my research I may decide to try DMT. my wife is a fairly open-minded person when it comes to life in general and the way people view life and their opinions, political standpoint and what have you but last night I was talking to someone with a very close mind to this whole subject matter. I tried to reassure her that at this point the only thing that I am doing is researching the information on this drug but all she could hear was me telling her that I want to do drugs. my guess is it's going to take quite some time and some real concrete facts and real solid positives about this subject to break the wall she has up against psychedelics. open till very recently I have shown no interest in wanting to do any kind of drug or have any kind of escape from my life. I am trying to reassure her and trying to let her see from my point of view that I am not trying to escape any thing about my life and in fact I love my life so much that I am seeking something that might enhance my life in a way that I may be able to love more than I do right now and maybe be able to receive love you more than I do now.
she is a very conventional woman and she is a great school teacher and she has very strong views on drug use. The purpose of the conversation last night was to bring it up and strictly let her know that I have an interest in seeking information about this subject. I think I made some valid points and arguments but all in all I do not think that she heard me correctly due to the fact that she is someone who will worry about what she has seen in the media or on TV or everything that she's been taught about drugs. my points were lost on her. if anybody has any literature on the positive effects of DMT were negative affects of DMT or anything that I could use to better understand what I can expect from this please point me in the right direction.

My ex-wife and I were divorced in late July. Few days ago, after I told her what I was up to recently, much to my surprise, she reveals she has read this state of mind(and the substance, too) in several books a while ago and really fond of it. The reason she didn't talk with me much at all is because she thought I would be skeptical about those mumble-jumbo. She said she finally let go of the complex negative emotions to me now. I guess she starts to believe everything happened for a reason. She is very supportive to my spice project and I'm grateful about that. Wish you two can work it out.

Like I said, check out the pdf in my signature (the open hyperspace travelers handbook) for some information on the subject. I go into possible risks, how psychedelics work, addiction potential and common misinformation among other things. If nothing else, it's a good place to start for building an argument. Then take your research from there.

My advice would be that convincing her is less a case of presenting her with facts, more telling her a story.

For that, you'll need to hone in on exactly why it is you want to explore DMT. Is it because you want a better understanding of life? Perhaps of death? Is it pure curiousity? A need to develop yourself as a person?

Whatever it is, it's going to be something personal to you. For me, psychedelics in general were about treating depression and self improvement. And when I convey this to people, I don't start by telling them about the research I read that convinced me that it was worth a try. I tell them about where I was mentally at the time. I tell them about how pivotal my first experience with mescaline was in turning my life around. I talk about the impact of subsequent trips on my wellbeing, and how far I've come in a short few years as a person because of it. But most importantly, I always just show who I've become by trying my best to treat everyone I meet decently.

It's through that story that I can tell about it that people don't think I'm deranged, or that I'm needlessly endangering myself, or that I'm a menace to society. Storytelling beats facts every time. That's why religion can go blow for blow with science, crooked politicians sway masses, and why there's still a "debate" around climate change. On the flip side, a good story can have a positive impact.

I'd say you either need to find your own personal way to convey your curiousity, or alternatively, find a story of someone who's walked a path you are interested in exploring yourself, and explore it with your other half. Just remember, if you are trying to win someone over, don't let that person by Hunter S Thompson

Maybe it would be a good idea to introduce her to this forum so that she can hopefully understand what it is and why people use DMT. Make sure she knows that it is not addictive, and that it is not a dangerous subtsance if respected.

I think that most drugs a frowned upon as the media has portrayed them as dangerous and addictive, and often lead to a downward spiral into other drugs and bad situations.

If she understands that you are purely interested in DMT for the psychological journey, and not other drugs, she might begin to accept it.

I have similar situation to yours. Tho there is no easy answer to your question. There is huge social stigma and ignorance regarding drugs. People just think that drugs are all the same. But I agree with autumnsphere that its better to let your close ones know what ur up to. My wife just get used to it and only sometimes call me druggy You have to fight the ignorance with facts. Learn as much as u can about DMT and make your arguments when time comes.
Wish you all the best.

why dont you ask her what her opinion is, and exactly what it is she thinks is wrong with wanting to try DMT. Then you can reply to her with concrete answers against exactly what it is that she thinks. Take her opinion and find the real answers and present them to her. Also let her know that you have concerns as well and thats why you want to research further.

The problem is you may not necessarily convince her to be ok with it. She may never agree, so be prepared to create a situation where she at least tolerates you trying it even if she disagrees. Which is part of every healthy relationship. I dont like country music but I am not going to require my significant other to never listen to it.

I recommend watching neurons to nirvana. Awesome documentary that encompasses other psychedelics. Im willing to bet one of her concerns is safety, so that should be your biggest research. Luckily for you as far we know these things are more safe than legal drugs.

I agree with anrchy. You may never have her endorsement, but you might be able to bring her to neutral ground.

As I said above, my wife opposed it at first, but with time she became tolerant of my explorations. Now, she doesn't care. I don't venture into the void nearly as often as I used to, so if I do feel like partaking she just giggles and says "have fun."

The fact that you respect her opinion(even though it's not favorable) says a lot about your character - a good thing. Hopefully she'll offer you that same respect towards your wish to try DMT. Being a school teacher, I can understand that she may be a bit biased towards any type of substance use. Perhaps my character has a few flaws - I pretty much just announced that I was going to try it and then did it with little regard to her concerns. In reflection, I wish I had been a little bit more delicate with our early discussions, but it's all past that now.