Lately I feel I've been learning a lot. I mean, a lot a lot. In fact, it feels directly related to the Mind Surgery thread, since I don't have access to have to those forums yet, I'm posting about it here.
My life took some turns I could have never seen coming. It has seen some very very dark times, and the past 6 years have been more or less dedicated in their entirety to understanding reality. Even when at work, driving, what have you, I've always kept my primary focus on contemplating the nature of reality. This is just how my life has been.
As of late, say, the past year to the past 2-3 months, things have really picked up speed on some personal feelings about my life in reality. To be honest, without going into detail, I feel a bit hopeless, overwhelmed, and burnt out.
That's not to say I'm depressed. I find reality absolutely amazing, stunning, mind boggling, so much so that I know I could never ever understand it in it's entirety. But, for reasons I don't want to get into entirely, I'm feeling hopeless.
In the next 10 days, I will have my first opportunity to partake in the DMT experience. I have done much soul searching, and strongly feel this is the time. I felt compelled to write this out. Thanks for reading.