Adjhart wrote:Good luck to you, OP, in your future endeavors.
Thank you, I appreciate you reading my thoughts and responding in a way which feels supportive, I wish you the best also.
re: all that other stuff -
I felt as though I was pretty clear about where I was at, and I left what I have found to be the easiest, most successful way that one might do the thing, which, last I checked, was supposed to be how the sharing of data would work, here.
I came, and learned and shared, and some people aren't meant for some boards, if my attitude isn't cut out for this, then it's my issue, not the board's. I like to express myself in a certain way, and it is really abrasive. The internet makes it difficult for one to understand what another person is saying with any nuance. You know this. I know this.
My issue becomes, if I were to actualize my optimum trajectory, I would fit into schema that weren't familiar to me. However, I tend to optimize defensiveness and dissociation as my stratagem for upward progression, instead of setting a baseline, saving the power of myself, and trying my best to work with the other person.
I think this is a lesson, in that I came to this thread to express myself and my experience, and albeit a bit obnoxious, it was just a stream of conscious in the moment that was occurring for me right then.
If I had stated that I was trying to exit, and it wasn't working out for me, the fact that negativity befell me from a member who has been a whole lot, when I was in the only part of the forum I can post in (which has added to my frustration - reinforcing that I am not right for the board, and that policy is great. It weeds people like me out.
The thing is, on a board that is set up for me to join in with discussion about something that is already somewhat socially anxiety provoking, for me to be 100% real, and to be called bitter, reinforces that I am not ion the right place.
So, I guess, my last point is, why would you kick someone in the ass on the way out, that seems like a bad look, you know? But, being butt-hurt about it, that's crazy, because here I am, taking time out of my day to argue with a figment of my imagination on the internet.
It's all love.
So Long!
And Thank You!
-all the fish