I greet you all with love and respect,
I've come here to learn and pass on what I have learned.
My real name is Roy, I'm currently 31 years old and I live in the city of The Hague in The Netherlands. My online name is the name I’ve been persistently using in online gaming for more than 17 years. I'm sort of attached to it so I use it most of the time on forums and games. I enjoy writing, gaming, music and last but not least, the love of others which I try to resonate as much I as truthfully can.
After looking at the blinking vertical stripe that proceeds all my typing for about ten minutes, wondering what I should write to explain who I am and what I want, I realised that the best I could do is to start at the point that matters and end where I am now.
So, In the best way that my mind allows it I'll try to explain who I was, who I am now and what I seek.
For most of my life I was an absolute atheist. My parents were in retrospect, the epitome of bad parenthood... So I was lost in more than one way. I lacked love from my progenitors and the creator. All this because of nothing more than Ignorance. Greed turned my parents into terrible role models and destroyed mine and my brothers childhood.
So for years I searched for a way to lighten the pain that weighed heavy on me like a cloak of pure darkness and despair. Thirteen years I spent doing an assortment of drugs that are considered " hard drugs" in most countries. Trying to find the path of happiness in the only way I could see at that time. Still, it was nothing more than escapism in the end...
On April 28-2013 I did LSD-25 for the first time, I did a high dose [around 640 ug] if i recall correctly. And I experienced Ego-death. And that changed my life. I ended my substance abuse instantly. But more importantly, I realised that all is one. That I am god, that everything is god. And that there is only love. At that moment I felt all the love I had sent out to others being reflected back towards me. I cried for quite a while. At that moment I finally learned to love my self. After that everything changed for me.
So now I try to honour what I believe is true in life, love, respect and understanding. Even more than I always did before my ego-death experience. I feel like I feel life itself more deeply that I could possibly do before. I love myself now… Finally. And I have people who love me. Therefor I am truly happy and I feel truly strong.
And now I wish to learn more.
I’ve been in a position where I’m nothing less than blessed that I have A very close friend who knows a lot about entheogenic substances and he has been my guide for most of it. But there is only so much one person can teach me and I want to learn more and experience more. No, I want to experience as much as I can.
And That is why I am here. I Wish to learn from other experienced people and walk my path with guidance when I can.
I find it difficult to compact all this important and meaningful information in one bit of text, without it being multiple pages long. My reasons for being here are pure. Out of love and curiosity. I always feel A flood of chaotic information when I write, so my writing may seen a bit messy at times. But I often edit my text afterwards to make it more readable.
With kind regards,
Draxon [Roy]
p.s.
Like the forum rules say. This is MY reality, MY truth. But in the end it has changed my life and has been good to me. That is why I believe that I must follow this path. But truth is only truth if you have felt it to be so. Find your path in life and see that your path has always been the true path for you.