So, the weekend gone, I had my first DMT experience in about 3 years. The first time I took DMT was bordering on one of the most intense experiences I have ever experienced. It literally blew my mind so much, it put me off taking it untill now.
Me and two others walked out into the highlands of scotland and sat under a huge oak tree, putting the pipe to my lips sandwhiched between two layers of green, I sparked up the pipe and passed it onto my friend. Upon exhale the entire forest became fractalled. The detail in the world seemed to increase thousands of times over, voices from the trees and the sounds of the river became ecstacy to my ears, patterns and bright colours passed before me, with a strong voice speaking directly into my mind "let go, just let go".
I felt my entire ego obliterate and fall into eternity, becoming one with everything and everyone, the legs and branches of the tree became part of me and the sounds of nature flowed through my very being. All my fear dissappated into nothingness, my own death became the apparent illusion, realising that we are all already dead and in accepting that you become free. The only unchanging thing is change and if one is not disturbed by that, he is worthy of liberation.
The girl who sat next to me looked over and I looked at her.. then some magnetic force beyond anything seemed to force us together, so strong you couldn't fight it, so so so strong... I burst into tears feeling like I had found someone so beyond anything and so beyond words or understanding, embracing each other I felt her very being pour into mine and mine pour into hers.. two souls in complete understanding of one another and in completely absolute bliss.
I also felt the pressesnce of creation.. something beyond any comprehension or understanding, their is literally nothing, no trip report or person or any being alive who can describe it or give it any kind of definition, it can only be known by experiencing it and it can only be known when you let go of the self and experience unanimity with it.
After the trip I felt so at peace, bliss and understanding. The trees and all of nature seemed to speak to me and her, as we walked hand in hand in complete silence. The entire morning I spent with her was literally silence.. just understanding through feeling and a lack of words...
I can't say much more because I feel that thoughts are almost lies now.. anything outside of the moment is asking for trouble, asking for corruption and asking for suffering.. I feel I understand how I have to deal with things on a moment to moment basis and let go of all my wild ideas and dreams that are nothing untill I choose to act on them, conspiring in their chains of action and reaction to become reality.
We are all one and one is all of us.
I love you all deeply and completely, whoever you are, you are me and I am you. I love you all eternally and if I ever meet you, I am grateful for your presence and if we don't meet I am grateful that you exist anyway, able to offer so much possibility to so many.
Love and kindness, compassion and peace to you all.
Om mani padme hum.
One can drive himself to madness in the obsessing goal of reason, without the knowledge of love and laughter.