Hey everyone, really love this community its been a great place for learning since I first took the plunge.

I plan do a full trip report on my first time soon but just wanted to say a few words to introduce myself.


I'm one of those people that is always searching for the 'truth' but it often seems like a neverending journey with no final destination.

Since I heard about DMT on the JRE podcast I knew this was the thing I'd been looking for. How I had not found it sooner still baffles me since I've spent so much time reading and learning about subjects that brush right up against it but somehow I managed to not notice it right there the whole time.

I'm in my early 30's and have never found the idea of taking psychedelic to be very attractive at all. I probably imagined that there wasn't much to be learnt from being in (what I thought would be), a state of delusion. The images the typical in entertainment/media of acid users for example had put me way off plus the fear of a bad trip seemed enough to convince me it wasn't my thing at all. Since about the age of 12 drinking & smoking weed were the only drugs for me until about a year ago.

What has brought me to DMT Nexus a real urge to compare notes with people who are in the same boat as me or have travelled this path already.

In short - I'm confused, I think I know less now that I did before I took my breakthrough hit, to try wording it better: I now know how much I didn't know. And I used to think I knew alot but like someone hit my reset button I've found my self looking at life as if I only just arrived here.

I suppose it's been fun on one level the intergration is still happening for me so things I knew so well are somewhat new to me again. I find myself having complete 180 degree opinion changes on things I was so sure about before. Conclusions that were set in stone have melted away leaving me unsure of everything.

One of the only things that can look to with 99% the same feeling from before is an experience I had when I was about 14/15 attempting (I know this will cause eye rolling from some) astral projection. I only got so far along in my attempt but I did have enough sucess to know a certain vibe. That vibe was there when I broke through to hyperspace. If there is any such thing as truth those are the two times seem like the closest to I have got and both times it was totally overwheling.

It's all subjective, and I guess your search for truth depends entirely on what you define truth to be.

Psychedelics as a whole are great for refreshing your view on life. Personally, I'd been casually using them for a while, but really got into them about three years ago in a last ditch attempt to cure a depression that had hung over my life up until that point.

Mescaline and LSD were the catalysts for my personal transformation, as they both helped me to find the 'truth' about myself which my conscious brain sought to suppress. While I've dabbled with DMT so far, I still consider mescalito and lucy to be the bigger teachers here as you spend a whole day in that altered state, and that time really allows you to open the door on yourself and to understand the experience. One thing is for sure - the media definitely have a very, very poor understanding of these drugs, and portray them in an incredibly negative light when the experience is anything but.

I'm glad to hear the DMT has allowed you to begin questioning things. My ethos now is to question everything, most importantly yourself, and allow your views to change based on what you discover.

Anyhow, welcome to the nexus!

Yes subjective is the word, more recently I've felt like searching for a concept such as 'truth' is maybe a flawed aim but that only started to dawn on me lately.

I did give a single tab of 110 ug LSD a go about 6 months ago and found it very insightful but the atmosphere was quite eerie and unnerving - I hope write that one up too at some point.

Mescaline is defo on my bucket list, I'm hooked on looking at artwork inspired by entheogenic experiences at the moment and the mescaline stuff jumps right out you.

Thanks for the warm welcome Shanghigher

I think it's more about an understanding than a truth. After all, we can't definitively prove what we experience while under the influence, more just to accept it if we so choose. Also, we're too underdeveloped mentally and flawed as a species to truly get to the underlying truths of the universe, at least, not in this life time. But we can do our best to make as much sense of everything in the time we have

The atmosphere on LSD really depends on who you are with and where you do it. Personally, my favourite set up is to be at home by myself with a high dose. That way, I can truly let my mind wonder, and I also have the added benefit of making my settings as close to perfect for me as possible. One thing I really find helps is to be able to choose your own music. Even with friends, there are going to be things that you are more into than them, and visa versa. Having full control on that particular dial makes all the difference in my opinion. That said, I normally managed to sneak in QotSA's Like Clockwork album regardless of who I'm with

Welcome Iweme! I hope you do find your feet, but you may find that you have a different definition of "feet".

It's been over two decades since my first breakthrough psychedelic experience. And I'm still integrating. You just start to get comfortable with having a more flexible, adaptable definition of Self. The journey of integration can be full of wonder, so enjoy the giddiness of finding yourself looking at the world differently. It's a rare and beautiful state to achieve, to be able to actively and consciously explore what you are.

And yes, the setting for a trip is everything. You can read a lot here at the Nexus about set and setting, but it's really about creating a mental and physical space that is comfortable, safe and nurturing. That should reduce some of that eerie feeling, although there will always be some sense of existential vertigo when you are standing near the edge of reality, even on a smaller dose.

Find yourself a passion, that's what I'm currently trying to find. Before I was destroyed I had a few passions I was actively pursuing. Now those things don't seem so important. In fact a ALOT of things in my life feel different to me now haha.

Get out and get that sun on your face and smile. Trudge on.

Totally agree with Anrchy here. I'm very fortunate to have made a career from my passion (writing), but psychedelics have opened up new passions in my life. I feel greater empathy, and with that, my capacity for love has increased. I've picked up an instrument (bass), and learning fast. As my self loathing evaporated, a desire to look after myself has taken its place, and I'm now on the long road to losing my beer gut, and have put down the drink as a consequence.

In short, I know now that there is much more to life than my previously depressed self allowed me to believe, and I'm doing all I can to harness that inner fire

Welcome to the nexus. Dmt is great at causing 180 turns in your belief system. As far as seeking the 'truth'. I too am, and have been a truth seeker for many years. What a realized a while ago is this...That the truth is ever receding. The closer you get to the truth, the more the truth moves away. It's like climbing a mountain. You can see the peak. You travel towards the top, but every step causes the peak to recede farther. So what is truth? The truth is God/The Universe/The absolute/The one/The all/The source. The only truth there is, is the Source. All else is is but a relative projection, emanating from the source

Thanks guys for all comments, its exactly what I needed to hear. "Find yourself a passion" rings so true now. I feel like my DMT trip left me with a challage to find somthing like that.

I decided to write it all up so I can begin to move forwards and start to live out some of what it showed me.

I've posted my first experience here: Got totally checkmated - 1st time breakthrough with changa
I hope it doesn't sound to much like the rabblings of a madman