As some of you saw a few weeks ago I was really upset with the way my life was going. I was unable to feel any emotion, unable to feel any satisfaction from life, and had a horrible stuck feeling. Over the past week, I was like, reunited with my twin flame and I was flooded with a rush of emotions that have been buried by me for over a year. I felt on top of the world and our souls were dancing this entire weekend as my heart was pouring out infinite love.
She has a lot of experience with Psilocybin, LSD, and Ketamine (especially this) and felt she was ready to try DMT with me. At about midnight, she put on shpongle's museum of consciousness album and we each smoked it. She had an absolutely amazing experience and was guided by three light beings through a door to meet a female jester-type being made of almost a grid of geometry. She kept eve's attention and talked to her while the other three beings she said, were working on her brain, almost like operating on her and healing her. The three beings merged together to form a spinning flower which then turned into one single being that pulled a rainbow geometric shape out of her forehead after they were done working with her. They kept flying around her like they wanted to play almost. She came back and it was my turn....
I've had very intense experiences, where I was in the land of the elves and have been shown some amazing things, but I don't think anyone could possibly be ready for what I was about to experience.
I loaded a huge scoop into my bong and covered it with some lemon balm and took it all in one hit. It started coming on before I could even finish it and was almost full force by the time i layed down next to Eve. The come up wasn't like my usual laughing, euphoric, awe-inspired comeup.... This was fast, intense, terrifying, and just totally raw. My entire reality shattered and the only thing I can think of to describe what happened first was like, a yellow-orange etherical black hole that looked like a hurricane cloud appeared and opened up a tunnel that I was pulled incredibly fast and forcefully into. Once I was in this tunnel, it was ALL AROUND me. I felt like I was going 100 thousand miles an hour on a roller coaster of consciousness through this MASSIVE tunnel of spinning cloudy golden energy. I got the vibe that I was flying closer and closer to my death and began to experience some anxiety about my upcoming death. I thought about the attatchment I have to earth, and how it was all about to just go away, and then these beings all started flying with me. These werent the usual elves I see.... These things were pure light with no legs or faces flying all around me. I must have been breathing heavy or something because I heard eve's voice come into this space and say "baby you can do this. Go with them, they're safe... They want to bring you home."
At that point I surrendered and the tunnel took a 90 degree turn straight down. I was free falling through all the dimensions in an infinite void toward an extremely bright white light. This was also very very loud and the auditory part of this experience sounded almost technological. I felt like I was computing all of it in my brain and it was about to explode with an information overload. Usually the white light leads to the domed space that I've become sort of familiar with, but instead of just breaking through this light into this space, I totally flew through the light with no intention of slowing down. I got propelled into something so peculiar, and so unexplainable, that I was almost terrified. I thought I was legitimately dead. I thought Eve was going to have to experience me dying right in front of her. The intensity of this place was unlike anything I've ever seen. I felt like I shot right past hyperspace into a whole different type of breakthrough. I really can't even start to describe what it was like there, but it was extremely overwhelming and it's going to be a while before this was processed. During this experience, it didn't matter if my eyes were closed or open, I was in the same place. This definitely freaked me out more than anything because it confirmed the thought of death I had. Next thing I knew, I was propelled backwards through another tunnel and as I was spit out of it back into my body, I opened my eyes and the worm hole I entered through closed and flew up into the stars (which I could see through my ceiling)
As soon as I came back I just said "OH MY GOD" WOW" "THAT WAS JUST TOO MUCH OH MY GOD'
Eve asked me why it was too much and if I was okay, but I was still extremely loaded to the point where if I looked at her her head was about 20 feet long and I could see like 5 of them. My ceiling also looked like the sky but each of my walls was a body of water. It stayed extremely intense for another good 10 minutes before I was completely back in this world. I was overwhelmed with the feeling that the death I experienced was the death of all of my negative tendencies and mental processes, and I was being propelled by the universe into the most incredible parts of my life. When I came back, I felt totally reborn.... Like I could start with a clean slate and never let anything get in my way. The first thing I felt when I was back in my own skin was the touch of the lips of the love of my life on my cheek and I started crying tears of happiness and I thanked the universe for bringing us together to live our dreams as one perfect, symbiotic super organism.
I really thought I knew the limit of the intensity that DMT has to offer, but that was just beyond anything I could have ever imagined. During it, I was so overwhelmed and thought "OH GOD WHAT HAVE I DONE" but I was so happy that I had done it after. I have a brand new outlook on life now and feel like I can finally start to move forward into the things that I love doing. Life is a really beautiful thing, and it's meant to be filled with love.
If anyone else has felt like theyve ever shot right past hyperspace I'd really like to hear about it. This was so unlike any other experience I've had with DMT before. I got tears in my eyes explaining it, and was debating on whether to even share it it's so personal and powerful, but I love this community and feel like out of anyone, you guys would appreciate hearing about this the most. Much love to you all!!!!