So last night I had a dream or perhaps it was a vision, I can't really tell the difference at this point. I would like to share and perhaps if anyone reads this and has thoughts, ideas or any kind of feelings towards it or regarding it, I would love to hear them.
I witnessed my own death. I saw it from above, below and within myself. It was as if in a scene from a movie that shows different camera angels so you can be submerged in the moment.
My mom was there as was my spouse. My child thankfully was not. I recall the feeling of my throat closing off and my mouth was open to its max capacity. My eyes were bulging, wide open and the taste of "the smoke" was present.
I can hear my mom screaming my name over and over and over again in complete fear and panic. My spouse was screaming "whats wrong with you, whats happening?" I really wanted to answer but no sound could escape my throat.
What hits me the hardest, was their terror and fear. It vibrated thru my core and I started to become overwhelmed with the feeling of attachment. The thoughts that came were "I do not want to die! I will miss them so very much! I still have so much to do here!" and the eternal cry of most of us "I have waisted my entire life and nothing to show for it! Please NO! I don't want to leave"
All the while their screams, although still audible, began to get fainter and fainter. The light in the room starts to dim slowly. I can feel that unmistakable feeling of weightlessness begin to sink in. How could I ever forget that feeling? It is the same feeling I had from "the smoke". I can sense "them" around me, surrounding me, beckoning to me. All of a sudden a single thought, clear and concise forms in my consciousness "You have been preparing for this moment all of your life, You know exactly what to do, now you just have to remember!" And I knew I could not let the fear from loved ones left behind guide me on this journey now! i must Be free from fear, attachment, longing, suffering and your pride, let it all go! Recognize the beautiful sounds and lights that are before me and do not give in to Awe! Do not recoil in fear, for there is no where to return to or go back to, forward on I must go.
I remind myself not to fear the images that appear before me. The Gods and goddesses no matter how peaceful and beautiful or terrifying, know from my soul, that they are in fact myself.
When My past actions come forth and start to lure me deeper into that dark realm,recognize this too as myself. Do not Fear! Do not give into temptation and do NOT accept this as my fate!
Remember YOU ARE THE LIGHT!!!!
And at that very moment, I wake up. I gasped for air and looked around myself! I quickly look to my side and see my spouse sound asleep and my dog and cat curled up all comfy. The look of relief I felt can not be expressed! But at the same time, the sorrow I felt was so strong. I realize now I have got to get this "Attachment" under control. Attachment to the Human Experience. For if I don't Im surely bound to be caste back ion cyclic existence once more after I leave this world.
How do we let it all go? I know the answer is so simple. After breaking thru to the other side, we do know now after all that there is "another side" that should really be all we need to let go.
Should be...
Namaste
May the light shine upon you and also within you
Once you open your eyes you can not go back to sleep... I see you, Namaste peace, love, light