Greetings and Salutations!

I am Shir0,
I am extremely pleased to have stumbled upon the nexus. The amount of intelligence and open-mindedness I have come across here as a lurker has been very warming.

I have always had a curiousity of the unknown. Being born in an age where I had the blessing of immediate information at my fingertips, I very much rebelled against any "official" way of doing things. I learned very quickly in my youth that the stories and conditioning fed to us where only one flavor upon an infinite spectrum of possibility.

I would like to attribute these personal revelations as contributing factors to a lot of feelings of alienation and loneliness in my youth, as I felt constantly misunderstood or unable to fit in with the average crowd.

My first experience to psychedelics, was an approximate 800mg dose of dxm. After stumbling upon the effects produced online I had researched heavily into the substance, and after the failure to shake the curiosity, I pulled the trigger. It had completely blown open my perspective of everything I had ever thought I had known. It was an unbelievable powerful and glowing experience. If I could pretend to know what an ego death indeed was, this would be my first experience of it.

There was no me, I was intertwined within the making of all that is, there was no longer time or space. I also felt like the subject of some kind of grand science experiment, like a rat in a cage having experiments performed on it.

After this glowing first dxm experience, there where many more dxm trips of course, followed by whatever other psychedelics I could acquire. I also learned of different research chems and experimented with many of the 2c compounds as well as amt and 5-meo-amt.

A little later in my teenage years I kind of fell in with the wrong crowd and began to switch from a strictly psychedelic diet to more of a "junkie" diet. Which led to about a 5 year struggle of addiction. At the peak of this disaster was a strong dependance on heroin and methamphetamine. At one point I had ended up homeless, and came across a guy at a shelter that had introduced me to Buddhist meditation. Upon this discovery, I had gained a complete new control of my internals, and was now equipped to process emotions much more soundly.

This blossomed into a new found appreciation for spirituality in all flavors, a series of synchronistic events that changed my life and pulled me out of the hell hole I was in. I still smoke cannabis and have had a few LSA experiences recently, that have also been quite profound.

I have for a long time been seeking to partake on an Ayahuasca journey. I have always had the intention to do it under the guidance of a Shaman, but as that does not seem like it will be a possibility at any near future, I am in the works of studying brewing methods and creating my own brew.

I hope to gain more inner understanding of my psychological workings, a glimpse beyond, and a regeneration/acceleration of my spiritual practice.

I look forward to being a member of this community, and sharing in everyone's wisdom and insight.

I hope you'll have me as a part of the Nexus.

With Love
Shir0