This story begins a long time ago and has been quite a journey but for now I will just post what I wrote after my "breakthrough"(?) and also some scribbling from during.


"first cone at about 11:30am"
"2:02pm 29/03/2014
ok haha.... this is probably going to be all over the place but
yeh...

time is all over the place... thats another pone like "memory is
a thing of the past".... From the moment i "smoked" the cone, i
can sort of remember doing that, to now, time has been over
lapping and trying to come back to a "stand still"?
Im not sure how long it was since i had the cone. maybe, it
was just after i sent phoebe a msg... one se.c.. maybe 1 1/2
hours? That doesnt make sense... doesnt dmt last 15 minutes??
uhh.
My room was dark but It is daytime so I still had light coming
through. my room is also a mess so the lgiht was doing lovely
things Everything white, or light had turned to this fluid. I
have a sheet flopped over my chair that was absolutley
incredible! It is white and purple floral design(thank you
phoebe! Now i Understand!) and the white was all fluidy! So
incredible. This is what opened me up to the "life juice fluid
world" and I had breifly stepped in(or breifly from my
experience, no idea why it took 1 1/2 hours) but immedietly had
to pee and felt like I had already peed all over the place.
(because of my knowledge of purging in the amazon, I shat
myself, not literally, and ran to the bathroom).
its wierd because I really needed to piss before i started and
made sure to but during it i had an urge to pee... ill get to
that in a sec... so for most of it I was sitting down on my bed.
It felt like nothing was happening. The just like when we were
kids, the "fainting game"... you breathe and breathe until
you're dizzy then hold your breath and have someone push you on
the chest into a wall... its pretty brutal when you think about
it.. well i had this feeling, like, "hmm nothing is happening" i
could hear a faint ESR that was falling off but that faded off,
i think... I saw the "life juice" mckenna talked about. at this
point i really needed to pee. it felt like i was pissing all
over the place and down my leg so i quickly, somehow, got up and
manouvered my way into the bathroom and pissed...... if you see
my room you'd understand the challenge i did in 3 seconds
haha...
whoaaaaaaaaaa wtf?! I seriously had walked thru a
silvery/purple fluid world taking up the light in my room, dark
room, to going into my very bright bathroom. between the bedroom
and bathroom i cannot remember, but the bathroom turned back
into this fluid life juice world... and I was pissing! White is
so amazing! it looks so white! I cant f##n believed I pissed...
i need to check i didnt piss everywhere.....brb. wow haha, clean
as a whistle!(that hasnt been blown...) i came back into my room
and laid down again.
At this point I started coming back and was trying to put
myself back into "time". I couldnt figure it out, i was curled
up in fetal position laughing, well kinda grunt laughing to
myself like, "Ha!, Ha!". I was trying to cough haha,,, oh thats
how you spell it!(you'll understand later), but I just couldn't
"end" the cough. It was like I was coughing and it was going in
reverse, like that red dwarf episode, imagine coughing in that
world and how it would feel? This lasted what felt like, i dont
know haha, maybe 15 minutes? This 15 minutes was the most
incredible 15 minutes of the trip...
Time wasn't coming back to "life". I cant explain it... I was
trying to cough but It wouldn't let me "finish" and it made me
laugh, think about the fact that I had just had a cone of DMT,
had I just smoked that? I dont remember? when did this happen? I
thought I decided to lay down? no, nothing happened SO i laid
down, uhh??????? wtf? this repeated 3-4 times... I swear time
was looping. Not experience, time,was looping. and not just
looping but over laying and in reverse and starting again, from
one point... the point of me thinking of me thinking about if
I'd had a cone of DMT or not...!?".
I wrote something down during this point... I'll take photo in

a min. There was a point during the writing that I noticed time
coming back to normal. It kind of did but when I thought about
how it was back to normal, it would try to slide back into...
uhh?? whatever it was! non-space/timeland!(good name for a theme
park)

ok so... this was the process... I had reheated and pulled the
first bark batch and prepared a cone. I was going to prepare two
but I figured this looked nice and clean and was packed on
tight, not yellow, pure white and shiny! the other was the
scraping from the bowl, yellow and honey like, I was "turned
off" and wanted the "clean pure looking DMT". I had the first
cone, it pulled nicely, maybe too fast... Now, my fan, power fan
and music were on. I immidetely had an overwhelming feeling to
turn off the music and fan, which I wish I went to the effort of
doing... It was shine on too! I am pretty sure, not 100% sure,
that this caused the DMT not to hit me properly. I could hear
the ESR but it was too hard to try and vocalize to becaus ethe
fan and music. I just put up, had no visions but an
overhightened sense of my senses! It was cool, pretty cool
indeed!
I then got tired and laid down. I felt sleepy. I got a msg
from phoebe and, from what i can blurrily remember, I laid down
to sleep. I must have gotten up to have a cone, I dont remember
falling asleep, I rarely sleep as it is, but I do remember
getting up to have a cone, as i do. I kind of remember, yeh now
i can remember it... I decided to pack the second cone. I packed
a small layer of weed, the honey like goo covered with white
shiny crystal things, a layer of cigg ash then a light layer of
weed again. I smoked it super slowly, i can remember this now. I
remember getting to the end of the cone but having a bubble of
honey goo left but i was full and starting to come thru! I put
the bong down, blew out and said nup f%#k this... picked it up
and kept smoking... oh my f%#k.......

From skimming the post it doesnt sound like a full breakthrough, however I've had definite breakthrough where I was fully mobile but usually ina FULL breakthrough you either can't more or simply don't want to, may feel like you don't even have a body to move, as for peeing and feeling of shitting your pants dmt has a similar effect on me two times so far I have had thr thought I peed myself upon come up, and another 2 times i farted as it can cause gastro issues even when smoked I thought that fart turned into a full blown shit, so the firs time I was low enough to dose to rationalize that i dind't shit my pants and my body just felt weird and made me think i did, the second time, was a full break through, and I farted thought I shit my pants,
started running to bathroom when the breakthrough hit and I could barely see reality anymore so I lay fetal position on my floor just thinking if i shit my pants no use in cleaning it in this state, I'll just make ore of a mess so laying calmly until the drug wore off was y best bet... as for the length of time, time dilation can occur meaning 15 ins can seem like hours, days onths years or even eternity, hell I've been outside the time line as we know it, and literally felt eternity a an emotion, and still cae down fine and realized truly only 15 mins passed, however dmt can have an after glow for 1-24 hours I know for 2 weeks after my first breakthrough I had an after glow that I wasn't tripping but everything was so new to me like I was seeing as a child again for 2 weeks. SO long story short yes DMT can have after effects other then initial 15 in smoked peak and decline effects.

The reason I refe to this as a breakthru is because I wasn't in my room during the "life juice" part, which was most. After further analysis I realize that I had spent over an hour inside my "closet" and had been brought back in this realm because of my urge to pee. When I "came to", during my time loop phase, I had an overwhelming feeling of coming back from another place. This was nothing like my first experience which was just visuals and time and space felt the same. I plan to come home and write the entire experience properly. Time and memory has only just come back properly for me.

I do agree tho, I don't think it was a full breakthru.

Well I mean if you did feel in another place maybe it was a sub breakthrough dose. Everyone is different, as is every trip, I've had full breakthroughs where I was still fully rational and able to interact with my environent through full blown OEVs and still felt as if I was in another universe but knowing I was under the influence of a drug at the same time. I'm curious to see the full detailed report

Sub-breakthroughs can be plenty visionary, depicting fully immersive realms. Breakthroughs tend to have better visual resolution, more intricate, often more intense, and the pay offs when it's all said and done are that much greater. There are of course different degrees of breakthroughs as well. At some point it becomes silly to start deciding where to draw the lines, but I'm happy halfhead, that you had such a powerful experience. It always goes deeper.

6:37pm – 1/04/2014

I have been remembering, sort of, things that were happening and the whole process. I'd like to write everything from the first cone.
On 29/03/2014, at approximately 11:30am, I had packed a decent chunk of white crystals of DMT, which I had extracted the day before from Acacia Confusa Root Bark(ACRB), into a glass pipe. After burning a few the previous day, I had come up with a new way to smoke it though the glassy. This time, after doing a long breathing exercise, to increase my lung capacity, I had VERY VERY slowly heated the glass and rolled the DMT around until it started to vapourize, stopped applying heat and breathed until there was so more so breathe in! This time it was so smooth, unlike the previous day... my lungs had copped a beating due to my lack of smoking knowledge... But I didn't experience any visuals. I felt my head buzzing loudly, very loudly, and had the ESR ringing away, I was warm and sleepy... but no visuals. Very odd. Perhaps I burnt it again. My lungs said otherwise.
After the buzzing went away I decided to try another samwidge. This was at approx. 12pm. I had packed another seemly large amount into a cone with, from bottom to top, marijuana, DMT, cigarette ash, marijuana. I very lightly lit the top layer of weed and allowed a small ember to catch then took off the flame. Slowly slowly the ember got larger and larger until it all eventually punched through the bong. Once again, I had the same feeling. Extreme buzzing, ESR(or is the buzzing and the ringing both ESR?) and a feeling of warmth and sleepyness.
At this point my girlfriend sent me an SMS and I replied at 12:36pm. I put my head down and closed my eyes, still sleepy from the last cone but, as I do, I got up to have a cone for my 'nanna nap'. I decided to have another samwidge. This time I had scraped the orange goo and remaining white crystals from the bowl. Not many crystals but a decent chunk of goo. I spread that over a layer of weed, put ash on top then more weed and slowly went at it. It was hardly catching a light and I was struggling to breathe but I managed to get a bit of smoke in my lungs. I felt the buzzing immediately but I wanted to make sure... I went back to the bong and had the remainder of the goo samwidge.
My room was slightly lit up but everything went dark! I could see my empty beer bottles glaring from the light outside and the light slowly creeping toward my computer chair. As I followed to the chair I noticed the sheet sitting on it was glowing! It was a fluid, much like chrome but a bit less shiny and it was grey and purply! This started to consume the majority of my room. I "got up" to look at it closer and tripped over some clothes on the floor and "fell inside" the fluid. When I was inside, I really can't remember too much of this, but I could see something like.... Kind of like a room, it's walls entirely made of this fluid, was trying to manifest something but before it could I needed to pee really badly. This is when I "pissed" all over myself and my bed and sheets and floor and hallway, which I didn't of course haha, but this time i DID actually get up, somehow... When I stepped into the "life juice fluid world", (Don't ask me why I called it "life juice". It's just the first thing I thought when I saw it), I was still sitting on my bed. I remember when I had this feeling of needing to pee, I was "brought back" from this "Fluid world" and it felt like waking up from a dream. A dream where you've started to pee but wake up to realize you've actually pissed yourself haha...(done that a couple times... shh). When I went for the pee It was incredible... Not so much the visuals but the sound! The sound of pee hitting water... wow! That was so amazing haha. It sort of sounded like sonic whistles, the sound lightning makes from the outside of the planet, but rather than stopping it would be a slow drop in tone, like a bomb dropping, until I finally finished. I washed my hands... Amazing haha! The life fluid was rushing out of the tap all over my hands! It felt, and SOUNDED amazing!
I remember stumbling back to my bed and put my head down. Immediately I "shot up", thinking about what had just transpired, and said "What the f$%k!? Did I smoke that cone?!!"... I had NO memory of the experience, except for peeing and the brightness and sound, at least at the time...
haha time... As soon as I said "What the f$%k!? Did I smoke that cone?!!", time went back to the part of the trip when I had come out of the fluid world and had the feeling of needing to pee. The rest of the trip went the same, I went back to bed, lay down and shot up saying, "What the f$%k!? Did I smoke that cone?!!". This time I had realized that I had already said this before and started to laugh! Well more of a grunt laugh as if I had discovered something, then once again time looped back to as I was "stepping in" to the fluid world through my closet. I fell back out of it this time, as if slipping on something, then had the overwhelming need to pee again and the trip continued as "normal". I get back to my bed, lay down and shoot up and say, "What the f$%k!? Did I smoke that cone?!!" and once again I couldn't contain myself! I was so amazed at what time was doing! I had to grab the paper and write before it happened again!
This time, as I sat there and write what was written on the image you see(somewhere). This took me a while, or seemed to, and I could barely write. I realllly found it hard to put sentences together and i couldn't remember how to spell a few words.
While I wrote this I was trying to cough, but I couldn't. The cough would feel like it was only beginning, never ending! (that is what i was trying to write on the page where it says "I'm in a loop of time. I'm try to caugh but i just get the...". This went for about 20-30 minutes(i think) then I was able to cough and funnily enough, that was the end of time trying to "settle back in". Time had come back to normal and I could use my body to function again! This is when I got up and wrote the above description of my trip.


What the fuck is going on here? I have heard about time playing tricks when on DMT but I am yet to read/listen to anything regarding losing 1-2 hours. Is this common? Have any of you heard of this occurring in the past? (or future! Ha!). I don't know, but I really would love to! I just can't get my head around what time had done! I will never forget the feeling of laying there in a fetal ball saying to myself "What is time?! Time is an illusion!".
I have been thinking about this for as much as I can(which is often.... all I do is think!) and have come up with a theory. Well, perhaps an addition to Terence's Time Wave. What if time really IS a wave? A wave that is relative to each observer? What if our perception of time can be altered by altering our neurophysiology though psychoactive/psychedelic plants/fungi or even through meditation, hypnotism, sensory deprivation etc etc? What if each of us has our own experience of time? Which makes sense when you think about it! Think about when you have a day at work and say to yourself, "Wholly crap that day went quick!"... No it didn't! What about the other guy who had a really long day?! Time is relative to experience and observation! This MUST be the case!(Or so my brain is telling me!) But how much can time be altered by our experience/observation? Can we manipulate the way we experience time? And I don't mean by having a cone/samwidge/etc of DMT or eating 5 grams of dried cubensis mushrooms or a heroic dose of ANY psychoactive plant/fungi, at least not JUST with these substances. If Terence's theory was correct, which Dennis doesn't think so(with good reason), then there must be more.... how the hell do I put this... Multiple waves of time happening at once perhaps? A wave for each observer? In my opinion, Earth is conscious and is also an observer, as is the solar system and the galaxy etc etc. So is the Galaxy, solar system, Earth, animal, fish, bug, bacteria, molecule, neutron, proton, etc, etc, etc, bound by one set of rules for time or are they all relative and experience time depending on our/their overall/current experience is? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm. How can we even find this out? Oh how I wish we could quantify the DMT experience!!! We just need to keep experiencing and writing our findings! At least until someone figures out how to quantify EXPERIENCE! Very important...

Once I have a proper breakthrough, I'll understand hehe. I've read about many breakthroughs. What happened to me wasn't close to them. Perhaps if I had more

My next goal is to learn more about how to use this goo, learn how to reX and plan more experiments. I have been recording the "main tone" of the ESR i hear with small doses to see if they differ. I have had the most amazing fun just experiencing low doses and strictly listening to the DMT. I'd open my eyes and get some visuals but would close them immediately because I felt distracted from the sound. But more on that on a later date I am not finished yet hehe

I've wondered about similar time issues - each organism, and/or type of organism, having its own unique experience of time; for example I've wondered if when we watch time lapse videos of plants/trees, are we seeing their life closer to how they experience it? For instance, perhaps the changing of the seasons throughout 1 year is just 1 day/night to a tree. Another example could be those little gnat-like insects that fly extremely erratically back and forth, in messy circles, zig zagging etc - maybe they're experiencing time much slower, and their flying - to them - is much less erratic. If we watched ourselves over the course of a day but sped up enough, we would seem to move extremely erratically as well. This probably sounds like some pretty stereotypical 'stoner thought' as some would call it, but it's been interesting to think about before.

Now I know you're also talking about time being experienced differently among members of the same species, too - like you said, someone can have a day that goes by fast while for another the same day goes slow. Ultimately, yeah it seems pretty clear that time is much less than concrete.

Would be interesting to live a few days in a time before the invention of the clock...

And lastly, this all reminds me of a quote attributed to 7th century Mayan ruler Pakal:



I don't know how true it is that this is a quote left from Pacal for modern humans, and I'd never seen that bracketed part included with the quote until today, but...there it is.

Ah yes there are so many more creatures that come to mind now that seem to play differently with time! Like flock birds and massive schools of fish that all swim/fly the same, "erratic" patterns at high speeds and instant turns that seem impossible to orchestrate. I wonder if they experience time at a different rate than us?

I like this Mayan saying My life has changed a lot, in terms of mental organization, since I started my small garden in my back yard. Over 2 years now. I've been so amazed at how the sun moves, precession. Seeing the plants grow and change according to the sun's position during the seasons has really made me appreciate nature so much more! I have had an overwhelming urge to create a greenhouse over these last few months!
This to me is what Pakal may have been talking about. A reconnection with the solar system as a part of your daily life. Which reminds me about my first real "walkabout". I was obsessed with fishing during this time. For 3 months every morning, according to the tide(or moon), I would go down to my creek while it was low tide, catch bait fish and prawns then set up 2 mud crab pots and then fish until the tide came back down. I had no choice but to stay for the entire tide. The path in gets flooded! Anyway my point is, I had lived my daily life according to the sun and the moon. If the patterns of the sun and moon were set in stone everyday, then time would have been the same everyday but I would go fishing, or water my plants according to the position of the moon or sun. Time becomes relative to the solar system rather than the experience of just the earth and the rotation around the sun.

Thank you for bringing that up