My friend got a healthy portion of crystal DMT about a month ago. I've been more enthusiastic about it than him (he coughs and gags the second he inhales, no chance to hold it in) so he ended up making me a very generous offer for the remainder last night.
My other (oldest and best) friend has been jonesing for a journey after hearing me talk about it, so we went in the unused bathroom in my house, turned on the shower (I LOVE the sound of running water with DMT) and took probably about 4-5 hits each (isn't it funny how you can never recall the exact number after a certain point?)
I got comfortable on the floor and blasted off like I never have before.
I can't really give a chronological reconstruction of what went on, so I'll try and make some bullet points...
First there was the ubiquitous color, lines and spinning shapes but my first lucid recognition came that I was laying down and forms were looking over me curiously. I guess I'd call them 'Shadow People' even though that sounds kind of ominous and they most certainly were NOT malevolent. It was something I could feel instinctively.
-Flash forward a little bit. The first real good breakthrough I had awhile back revealed to me for almost a split second a 'Giant' Shadow Person beckoned me forward but I got distracted and lost it right away. It's been sort of a goal of mine to see this dude again.
Lo and behold, I'm in a darkened basement like room with some kind of portal/projection screen on the wall. Something that looks like the Giant appears and again beckons me forward. But in the back of my head I knew this was not the real Giant, just whoever/whatever else was there trying to amuse/comfort me because they knew I wanted to see it again. I felt thankful!
-All of the sudden, I'm in a long busy hallway. Shadow people are walking up and down it, and many are stopping to check me out. A couple just keep going on they're way and I'm slightly offended by their lack of attention at first but realized they may just have more important things to do.
Now, I just recently started using DMT but have been reading/studying/pining for it for about 15 years now. I felt like I had a hunch what was going on and I was very enthusiastic. The Shadow Folks somehow sensed this and moved closer to me in the hallway. One started clapping, as if to say "Hey, most people that get here are just wierded out, you seem to grok this on some level...". The rest caught on and started clapping too. It felt like being on the world stage and getting applause from your adoring fans for the very first time. Overwhelmingly positive. More of them took up the clapping. Is clapping some sort of universal symbol for admiration? After awhile some of them started waving and I though to myself "They're telling me I'm about to come down and waving goodbye". Not so, I think it was just another attempt at a gesture I could understand.
Even though we were all examining and digging each other, I was a little disappointed I couldn't communicate more. The beautiful positive feeling throughout gave me the bright idea to wave back to them. I did and it felt groundbreaking; we actually communicated, however simple it was. I vowed to them that I would be back at some point to try and connect with them again.
- Next, I'm laying down on some sort of slab again. A Shadow Person that I instinctively feel is female is standing over me and looking down at me. If this were a person I would have felt like they were creepy but I knew that she wasn't human and didn't understand our manners. She then gets down and all fours, leaning over me and straddling me (but not at all sexually). She is looking deeply into my face even though I can't see hers. I decided to just let her stare and get her fill, she wasn't hassling me and was curious.
- Flash forward to Electric Beach #1. I'm on the shore, but the sky and land are all made of electric pixels that buzz and vibrate. The water is real though, and as I wonder why I decide to wade into it. I did for a minute and it was very warm.
- At some point I'm on what I understand to be primordial Earth. It is mostly a giant ball of magma with little atmosphere. There are clouds of stellar gas and small chunks of asteroids whizzing overhead. I turn to look to see 'the first ocean' meeting the magma in the distance. It's sending off an ungodly huge mountain of steam that rises and dissipates wondrously in space. My scientific side interjects to tell me that wouldn't be possible, there was probably no liquid water at that time but I accepted it nonetheless. I decided to flex my muscle and try to fly up and get a better view of our proto planet. It doesn't work but I'm not disappointed.
- At some point I am in a megalithic atrium. Robed Shadow People are standing on a dais in the middle. One reminds me of the virgin Mary as she is holding a small bundle wrapped tight and caringly. It's of course not Mary, but she unwraps the bundle on a pedestal and there is a egg/sphere inside. I was made to understand that this is the most special thing in the universe, what everyone is seeking and trying to achieve. I was made to understand that you can't really look right at it, the egg/sphere is just it's holding shell. I wasn't disappointed at all, just grateful I got even that close to it in the first place.
- Later, I'm laying on my back in some kind of sunshine staring up at the trunk of a giant tree. I start moving upwards and realize the tree is made of stone masonry. Then I disvoer the tree is actually some kind of big castle. Then I zoomed off elsewhere.
- One of the last things that happened was that once again I'm laying on my back looking up at the 'sky'. I'm wondering what I'm supposed to be seeing when all of the sudden the GIANT walks right over my supine form! This was just random chance, not anyone trying to thrill me this time.
I'm sure there was more but at this point it's almost like a dream I couldn't remember right away.
I always have a small conscious human thought while I'm on it where I realize that the journey is going to end very soon. This time I didn't. I guess I sort of did but I completely accepted it. The whole experience was EXTREMELY positive and uplifting somehow.
I've never seen the entities before (besides that initial glimpse of the Big Guy) and was almost starting to think it was hogwash.
As it ends, I pick my head up and look at my friend. His eyes open a second after mine and we are both grinning ear to ear!
This was his first time and I stressed to him that it can often be unsettling/unnervingdownright frightening but that you're left with a good feeling after no matter what. He seemed to have a pleasant visual trip. No holy crap like I went through but he was a DMT virgin so I guess it's good enough that it didn't alarm him.
He was way psyched and convinced me to do a little bit more after awhile. Of course the second time was barely anything even though I totally didn't expect a repeat of the first time.
Anyways, there's a lot of talk about DMT in the normal human brain concerning the fact that it might be the basis of religious and near death experiences. I now feel like I know exactly what that's like, except I had the advantage of pulling the trigger on it myself and having prior knowledge of what might happen.
I have no doubt someone who didn't wilfully ingest DMT or came from a strongly religous culture would have felt like this was something holy. The Shadow People could easily be interpreted as 'angels' or deceased ancestors.
If DMT does indeed dump as a human is dying, this experience could be interpreted as visiting the other side and being sent back.
I'm glad I was so comfortable with the whole thing. I've felt super good and positive since last night.
Well, if you've gotten this far thank you for reading my text wall. I can't really talk about this with most people, they'd think I'm having some sort of psychotic break.