Hi there guys, i'm here today to tell you about an acid trip i had 2 days ago, including what it taught me, as well as asking your own personal opinions on the ideas and what i should do to better myself as a human.

I took 2 tabs, i don't eat much acid, so it hits me hard, anyways, it was strong acid, really strong probably 200mic a tab. I entered this world, where again, i had persisting sexual visuals. These visuals i found to be based very much so on the ideas of lust and desire, they seemed to be related to my ego. I entered a deathly world, a world which felt somewhat hellish, painful and cruel. I was with my girlfriend, i could see rainbows vibrating through her, but around her, including myself, was death. I had become completely swallowed by the ego, incapable of focusing my thoughts (if i did, then the trip would become more colourful, creative, and bright.) My perspectives were completely altered, they turned into depressing ways of looking at life. I found that the trip could end with me becoming a person who just gave up on life and accepted the fact i would never become a good person, or it could end with me coming out egoless. I did neither, instead, i was shown my current place as a being, and where the light at the end of the tunnel could lead too (which is ironic as it felt like a dmt breakthrough would take me to the end of the tunnel). I was also left with the idea that perspective is very important with tripping. And that you can get too deep and fall under the wrong perspectives and ideas… but they felt wrong, the whole trip felt wrong, so i didn't let myself accept the ego.

I have to question this, the ego felt wrong, the lustful ideas in my head, the desires etc, they felt like i could accept them in the wrong way, rather than the right way, does anyone have knowledge on whether or not you can accept something with the wrong perspective?

My girlfriend and i have been having troubles lately because i haven't been capable of accepting her past, nor have i been as loving, as well as questioning ideas such as cheating and ending things with her. I decided to use the acid as a mechanism to delve into the ideas of her past and accepting it. I was given that, but in a punishing way, as if i had been so stupid to question my love for her that i was worthy of nothing, just a dark place, a dark place i had created due to my own ego. Well, i found that the trip taught me my love for her is still there, it is my ego taking over when i am not accepting her past, and that can stop me from loving her.

I was also taught in the trip that before i can begin creating a new, more positive perspective on life, i need to learn how to focus thought, as well as accept the ego. Does anyone have any tips on how to learn to accept the ego in a positive manner rather than doing it incorrectly, which could lead to me becoming more egotistical? I Meditate, but learning how to bring thoughts into consciousness and accepting them i struggle with, i feel like i could be doing it incorrectly.

Anyways, that was my trip and i would love to hear some advice into these ideas as well as what you recommend i do to focus my thoughts and alter my perspective. Thanks heaps, Namaste

Hey cazman drugs are bad please don't do them.

Well friend, those are some thorny issues. The questions you are wrestling with have plagued philosophers since ancient times and beyond. Not to mention your girlfriend issues...

Heheheh.

The funny thing, though, is that the answers are all quite simple and abundantly obvious. Regardless of this... you will have to grok them the hard way. No matter what words of wisdom I or others impart to you, no matter how many deep books you devour, no matter how many enlightened masters you study under, this is still always a personal journey.

Even harder to accept is that some traditions think that this soul evolution work can take thousands of lifetimes or more.

I think there are actually some rather potent and effective shortcuts, and that most of us here can indeed solve this rubix cube and "graduate" in this lifetime. Who knows? I tend to be an eternal optimist.

What I will tell you is this: Your trip showed you exactly what is going on in your subconscious at this time. You want a different trip, you need to change your consciousness. Ego is a straw man you create. It is simply running the code you programmed it with. When you choose to, you can dismiss it with ease or reprogram it to be more helpful as you see fit. Fighting the ego is like Don Quixote fighting the windmills.

From your post, I am going to gather that you are still a relatively young man. As such, you have a lot of growth ahead of you whatever you do. Drama, failure, disappointment, and, even worse, success... all will come knocking at your door with their lessons. There is no real way to avoid it. Also, the odds are stacked against you and your girlfriend staying together happily ever after. Nothing personal, but the overwhelming majority of marriages end in bitter divorce... and most people date dozens of people they never even consider marrying. Relationships are harder to cultivate than the rarest orchids.

My advice is to find some objectivity and learn not to take things personally. A healthy dose of detachment with a hearty helping of selfless love can see you through anything life throws at you. You can even choose to enjoy the theater win, lose or draw. Be irrationally happy, and even more irrationally peaceful. And as for tripping, try spending a much larger portion of your trip meditating. Powering through an hour or two up front can reset your mind in what I call the Mental Backflip. After that you will be riding the trip and not the other way around. Well worth the effort IMHO.

Good luck,
HSF

You have two options here I think
Either stop taking drugs or let you girlfriend go.
She is playing on your instinct to protect her and the drugs are making it worse.
Your ego is your safety device and the way you are going about it is causing a lot of confusion.Yes you may realise when you are high that you know what you need to do and what is right although you do come down again into the animal game and my guess ,just back to where you started with an insight into what you would would like.

Alank i don't really understand why you recommend either of those options. I understand that the trips are greatly affected by my girlfriend yes, but aren't trips used, a lot of time, for finding the self? And the first step to finding the self is coming to terms with acceptance. Wouldn't it be beneficial if i tripped and confronted these egos, or do you believe its best there is an ego within a relationship so that it can be maintained? I'd be really interested in reading your complete perspective as i didn't fully understand your reasoning behind those options. Really appreciate the reply man, thank you for your insight… it does get me thinking

I think if you look at it as going through a stage in your life.
If you are insecure in your relationship due to past events then you are allowing the situation to block your natural flow therefore producing the ego.Getting high in that situation wont make it go away just slow its onslaught.Facing it could be a good option as you outlined although you would need your girlfriends complete trust and understanding.Or you could break away from your relationship and try to find yourself that way.Its really a personal choice and only one you can make.

Thanks for you insight man, really appreciate it. I have through time, progressively accepted her past. I feel it is something worth doing and so, i will attempt to face it. My girlfriend is very understanding and offers complete trust so when i do get caught up in it, we can communicate and work through. I feel that just leaving the relationship because i can't accept her past would be somewhat running away from the situation, rather than confronting it. And through buddhist teachings, it does say you need to accept your thoughts and come to complete acceptance for you to blossom. I do feel the need to alter my perspective, but after each psychedelic experience, although not completely pleasant and beautiful, i am definitely taught how to perceive things with a different perspective and tend to have better focus thereafter in my meditations… It will be interesting to see where this idea takes me, is it a dangerous game i've entered??? Maybe, but i will have to discover that on my own.

If you have any tips in preventing yourself from getting lost along this path, i'd love to hear them, thanks again for your replies