So after investing 9 hours in a chacruna + caapi brew that didn't work I almost gave up, but then came across this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ewamkPjI_pg
So went and got some mimosa and syrian rue, packed both in capsules as instructed in the video. Took the Syrian first, than 1 hour later the Mimosa. So 2 hours later, nothing, then decided to just chew a few more capsules rather than swallow, an hour later a heavy, tense feeling came, a feeling that I remembered as a child, the place somewhere between sleep and awakeness? I could be wrong but anyways, I am still coming down so I apologize for the somewhat incoherent writing.
Long story short, this was definitely something real, and divine. Why would I even be a rebel and go against it?
Aside from the tone in my ears, and "heavy" feeling, nothing was psychedelic about it UNTIL I looked at myself in the mirror, and on the wall behind me a spider, so i turned around and inquired, but some hand from inside me reached out and poked the spider, it responded by jumping at me, through my mouth, and then down to the floor. I tried to find it but it vanished (though somehow I feel it actually absorbed into my foot?). IT REMINDED ME A LOT OF THIS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dIILEyMauY
Basically I got the revelation that words hurt, and not particularly my words, but those malicious blabber directed at me, by family members.
Than I sat down and realized spiders don't jump, and they sure as hell aren't 1 inch in diameter. I had to Wikipedia "jumping spiders" to make sure. What's weird about that "heavy" feeling is it reminded me also of my time with parts of DXM - dextromethorphan. The spider is reminiscent of my time with parts of Benadryl (diphenhydramine) - I saw a huge crab/spider on the floor, though no where as clear and real as this DMT spider. Those are the two most "heavy" drugs I ever tried a decade ago just because they were cheap, and I regret.
Even though essentially it's a electro-chemical clusterfuck, there is still something divine and otherworldly about DMT. Before the spider I sensed my deceased grandmother in my living room? and then saw sparkles. The thing is I never met her nor particularly cared about her until 3 hours ago. All in all I'm glad I didn't go with a heavier dosage, it would've been to overwhelming.
Also before the Ayahuasca my feet were so cold (been that way for some while) they have suddenly warmed up, and I think it just may be permanent.
Anyway time to crash, I'll elaborate later.
Ok 1 more thing, I came in with intention of asking for insight on my career, and ALSO my ancestors, but all I got was ancestors. I looked in the glass window, and in the reflection I saw myself as a central Asian, nomadic Turk, Clad in wolves skin with a Tamga and overall raggedy clothes, my cheekbones protruded above all the others, I was blasted with vigor I have never felt before, ready to be aggressive like the wolf and conquer myself a good life, a peaceful warrior. However shortly after I had a mild ego death. No purging or anything. There was another spider encounter too but I can't really remember the details.
It was intense, and blissful at times. It hit me in waves.
While the waves were hitting me I wondered if one was truly pure inside and sincerely good, your experiences are guaranteed to be positive?... but Anger, resentment and other negativeness will take the form of a spider, snake, etc. I'll be blunt and say, this is the spirit world to me, until proven otherwise.