Hey people. I just had my first near blast off. And I immediately freaked and held onto reality as hard as I could.

After a minute or so of gripping to Earth with my eyes open, the momentum was lost and I felt comfortable knowing I wasn't going anywhere and relaxed into the remaining effects.

I think my basic problem is I was not well prepared, not in a mindset ready to let go and trust the experience. I've had a hard time approaching that, as I gave up most rituals years ago. In the past that stuff would have helped. Meditation seems like a good idea, but I haven't been regular in my meditation in about a year, so doing a prep meditation feels kind of phony, which doesn't sound like a good way to feel going into smoking. I could pray, as I do that, but while I do believe it would affect the outcome if the event, I'm not sure that it would do enough to leave me feeling sufficiently brave/humble/spacey/ready.

So, any advice on how to get ready / geared up / relaxed / in an appropriate headspace?


As for what freaked me out...the room just started to dissolve into space. I was looking at a wall and curtains. The curtains started doing a multiplication in mellow neon and white lined edges that were dancing all over the place, and the wall was in on the action despite its plainer starting point. But it was the sense of expanding blackness, and maybe also white light, in between all of the matter. It seemed as if it was surely going to open up to a point of no return, the room would vibrate out of existence, and I would float off to another place.

I just felt a big gut level response of "Not ready, nope! Abort!". It was pretty freaky for a moment thinking I may have no way to hang on and might be launched while in that fear.

The opening space thing is actually something I felt / saw a few times on salvia too, years ago. It freaked me out then too. I got past it on salvia by just dosing higher, not that I liked that much more. This seemed much more real though, somehow. To me, salvia always felt like an abandoned experiment of the universe, something that didn't actually lead anywhere, despite the big smoke and mirrors. This felt kind of like the legit version of the same phenomena.

I'd suggest starting with very small doses, maybe even as low as 10mg, just to get a little taste of the experience and work your way up. It's difficult facing such an intimidating experience, and it can easily be overwhelming. Over time and with practice you can teach yourself to trust and let go. It's very important not to fight it and just to flow with it.
Start low, and slowly work your way up. You'll become more comfortable and more willing to take the dive. You'll be glad you did!
Good luck!

I think adding some harmalas (smoked or oral) into the mix can help in a lot of ways, and this being one of them. To me smoked DMT alone without harmalas just feels way less in-tune, grounded, and tangible. Without them that state feels way less functional overall

And I'd definitely try taking a lower dose first, a few minutes before the big ones- this can really help break the ice and smooth out the transition into the hyperspatial mode..I also find some yoga followed by a few minutes of slow deep breathing to relax before smoking can help tremendously(even if your not a frequent meditator).

Starting to meditate more often can obviously help a lot to, in more ways than can be described here, but even after a very short time it can help. Theres no reason to feel phony doing it. Don't even think of it as meditation if you want, since thats only a word. Just relax and BE for a few moments beforehand and you'll probably notice a big difference in your experiences. What we get out of it is reflected by what we put into it.

Your heart rate and your state of mind are very connected... and if you can keep your heart rate calm in the moments before then the whole transition becomes much easier. Its easier said than done, but simple breathing exercises and a low dose beforehand can work wonders.

Think of your consciousness like a pond, with reality being the light reflection coming off it. If the pond is wavy or choppy, and not relaxed, the reflection will be all confusing and disjointed. If the ponds still and more coherent, it'll be much clearer...and the sailing will be much smoother. After you take your hits just close your eyes and smile.

best of luck

UC hit the nail on the head. Either take harmalas sublingually or make changa, maybe like 15x .75 to 1.

This way the onset will be slowed down quite a lot and you can take your time working up to full break through gradually rather than all or nothing. There really is no urgency to administer with changa. You can take your time. Also the warm feeling of harmals are incredibly comforting and for me quite euphoric so put me in the perfect relaxed mind set from go.

The only other thing I would add is letting go really is simply a choice. You have to decide before launch time that when the effects begin your will let go. One thing that helps a lot I tell people in your shoes is to smile. Even if your forcing it that matters not. Take a hit sit back and smile a big cheesy ass grin. When we use these muscles to smile seratonin and dopamine are released into the brain. When our face smiles the rest of the body follows in suit. It really does work.

+1

Another thing that can help, ime, is to think or say "Yes". Literally affirming the experience has turned some worrisome/bizarre experiences into some beautiful ones for me.

Very true Snozz, Good ole Antrocles's method works wonders. Imagine the difference between holding ones head rocking back n forht saying "No, NO, NO, NO!!!!" over and over opposed to a smile and saying "Yes".

Purity of intent ... Another antrocles I believe

That one has become more and more relevant for me
The deeper I go .

I also think that there is a time to say yes and a time to say
No ! Knowing when only seems to come with experience.

I suggest finding a setting and a mindset that works for you .
I can suggest out in nature . Also start low as many have suggested .
Also adding caapi leaf or vine in some form as well .

There is indeed a safe, comforting, feeling of out door nature day blazes. Its now my preferred setting.

i agree with all of the above

i like in the dark to, but theres nothing quite like doing it in nature...

Thanks Nexians. That all sounds like solid advice.

How do you all go about doing this in nature? I'm asking as someone who doesn't have a yard at the moment. Go to a park, walk till you find a thoroughly private area and plop down a chair, I guess?

As I've been getting back into the psychedelic side of life, I'm really regretting giving apartment living a whirl again. I need some outside space with easy access and privacy.

As for including harmala, that's definitely my goal. But at the moment I'm on an Rx that can't be combined with maois, unfortunately. I have a standard follow up visit with my psychiatrist soon and am planning on discussing the possibility of weaning off that stuff, leaving only another Rx that would not be an maoi problem. I'm fairly confident the non maoi issue stuff is what is really doing me good at this point anyways. We'll see if the doc agrees that is worth trying.

Anyways, I had a single ayahuasca experience some years ago and it was in some ways the highlight of my life. Powerful and beautiful but it felt gentle. Being able to get back to that combination, including the smoked route for a shorter experience, is really where I want to be.