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dosbrains
#1 Posted : 10/27/2012 6:59:24 PM
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Hello all,

To start things off, this was my first DMT experience. I was well prepared and clear-headed. This was not for recreation, but for further understanding of what reality is. I''ll just dive into this thing.



I arrived at an older friend's house to ingest it. We did not measure it (highly ignorant decision), and loaded a few small scoops into a pipe, sandwiched with Merideth Jane. My friend kept reassuring me it would be fine, to just smoke as much as I could, as fast I could. I took three strong hits of the pipe.

Within ten seconds, the room completely dissolved. I won't go into detail about the specific visuals yet, but I will discuss an eerie feeling. It seemed that I was being toyed with. I was thrown into reality and I couldn't stop talking. I could not stop rambling to the people in the room. I remember them telling me to lay back and relax. Yet, I could not stop rambling. I was so disoriented. I quickly began feeling terrible. Everyone was judging me for talking so much. I could hear them thinking it. Then, all of a sudden, nothing existed.

I was so upset about how my friend felt about me actions, and then they did not exist. It did not matter. Nothing mattered. My reality broke apart like tiny pink pixels. It all evaporated. Nothing WAS, if that makes any sense. It kept doing this. I did not receive the typical trips everyone speaks of. Sadly, this is only the beginning of the terrible choice I made. Slowly, I began fading in and out of reality. I finally caught hold of myself ( I was ten minutes into this trip) and I sat up, looked at my friend, and told him I did not smoke enough. I told him i wanted to cross the void. Keep in mind, I was utterly terrified at this point. I was lost. Yet, I did not want my fellow peers to see my fear. My friend stated, "You'll make it there this time. He loaded the pipe full of dmt and marijuana. He held the pipe for me, and so my view of hell began.


Before I go into this, I need some enlightenment. All the research I have completed states that the body rapidly creates a tolerance for this chemical. One must wait an hour before trying again.


Now, let me give you a time frame. I smoked the first three hits, ten minutes later, I was slingshotted into reality, where I told my friend I wanted more. I then proceeded to take the hardest hits imaginable. I could feel the smoke sizzling my lungs. After two hits, I completely lost everything. The pipe molded into my friends hand. My hands began melting into everything. My friend had a very strange look on his face. I assumed I was leaving my body, and he must be seeing something "missing" in my eyes. After those two hits, something told me to keep going. I then took four more of the most powerful hits I could take, completely sucking the dmt and burning ash into my lungs (this was accidental). A fellow colleague who tagged along to take a log of all the happenings marked the first three hits at 10:03 the second group of six hits at 10:16. I did not arrive at my body until 11:01. I am trying to be as detailed as possible due to my complete confusion and fear of this matter. I was sent into what I assume as hyper space.

The first scene felt like it took 5 years. I, and everything else in existence was a heart rate monitor (the kind one would find in a hospital attached to a critical-care patient). There was no machine in presence, just the heart rate line and a beeping. I could feel the monitor completely in tune with the beating of my heart and breathing respiration. To make things a bit more clear, NOTHING EXISTED, except this beeping heart rate. I WAS this heart rate, along with everything else in the universe. At the bottom of the monitor was a line that symbolized death. For some reason, I could not breathe. My heart rate would slowly trickle down and something was communicating with me through thought and emotion, telling me I must breathe. I would be out soon. The closer I got to the death line, the more they would encourage me to breathe. "You must breathe, you are going to be ok, stay with us, come with us, youre almost finished. Eventually, I made it to the peak of this. Looking back, it feels like that was a breathing exercise, to prepare me for what I was going to experience.

Then, the most terrible place I have ever been appeared. It was complete nothingness. Only the outline of a face from a side angle. Similar to a drawing. Once again, this blue outlines face was the only thing in existence. It was zooming in and out, flashing in and out with a yellow brightness. Almost as if it was screaming at me. It was accompanied by a loud echoing sound every time it would zoom end. WHOOOOAAAAHHHHH.....WHOOOOOOAAHHHH.....WHOOOOOAAAAAA. It was similar to a rock being dropped into a body of water. A very deep, loud thud, out of a horror film almost.It continued thousands of times. There was no perception of time. I was miserable in there. I could feel everything that is, was, will be, melting together while this flashing outline of a head terrorized me. I felt like I was being punished for taking too much. After being pulled from this place, i was thrown back into my body. I was sitting in the living room and my friends were asking if i was alright. I was so in awe by what had happened. After about 3 hours of sitting on the couch. I realized I was not tired, hungry, sleepy, or anything. Then it happened, everything ripped apart and started over. I was thrown into my body in reality, my friends asked if I was ok, and then it happened again. This continued for what seemed like one hundred thousand years. I lay on the couch with my hands covering my face. I needed out.

(This story seems confusing, I know. But it is difficult to describe, as some of you may know) After finally coming down, an hour and ten minutes total, I was very unsure of what had happened. Did i take too much? Would I be ok? Why was I able to take six hits fifteen minutes after three hits and still *launch* or cross the void? What the heck did I experience? Why? To clear things up, I did not have fear after it was over. I was truly astonished. It was beautiful. The colors, the speed of everything, the reality of time and it's relativity. I think I was blinded by the newness of everything and could not recall what happened. Yet, only a few weeks later I was reminded of how terrified i was in the void.

Well, four weeks after this event (last night) I was discussing this experience with a wise friend. I told him it was fulfilling and wonderful, as I remembered it being. I went home, smoked some marijuana, and began doing some light reading. As I sat in bed, it started happening. I started remembering so vividly of the stuff I mentioned above. Specifically, the zooming outline of the face and that terrible sound. My body started tingling and I could not stop it. I started fading in and out of these scenes. My body was filled with goosebumps, and i panicked. I called everyone I knew to bring me back to reality but nobody answered. I kept fading in and out. At one point I felt my body was stretched to the ceiling. I could see my feet on the bed, which looked to be 12 feet down. Then i shook a little, and snapped back to reality. A tingling and started at my feet, along with what felt like a giant air bubble, stretching the circumference of my skin. They both worked themselves up to my brain, and the vivid experience of my the mentioned above moment with reality not existing. It was replaying in my mind and happening all at once. I was so scared. It would not stop.


Now, here's where it gets really odd. It started working back down from my head to my groin, and I could feel a presence on my penis. All of my emotions rushed towards it, and it felt as if "something" was pleasuring me. I laid back, and found myself talking to what ever was touching me. Like I was having a conversation with myself, but I knew I was communicating with something, as well. I penis became fully erect and ejaculated. I apologize for the grossness of that portrayal, but it was the most euphoric feeling I had every felt. All i can say is what the hell has happened? What caused this? Lack of sleep? A spontaneous DMT release? Was it due to taking an extreme amount weeks before? Was i contacted by something? It was 3 am on the dot when this happened. I have tried to be as detailed as possible. Please attempt to enlighten me on what has happened.

Thanks for listening.
 

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bcmonke
#2 Posted : 10/27/2012 7:39:24 PM
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I haven't had a trip last nearly that long or take on the head melting scariness that yours seems to of. But I have had what I could only describe as small flashbacks.

My very first trip I heard a tone, resonating out of everything. Every now and then while I lay in bed, I can hear that tone slowly work its way back in to the world. Its always the same. My eyes start to dart back and forth in my head, dim 2d visuals, then after a few minutes it fades away. Only part that concerns me is I'll usually have a headache the next day.

 
anrchy
#3 Posted : 10/27/2012 7:41:04 PM

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hey, just some advice. break that into paragraphs so its easier to read, I read the first several sentences but just couldnt do it.

I really would like to finish it too. So far from what I did read, your experience seems effected by the people and the dose. This was your first dose and it sounds like you werent ready for how strong it was going to effect you being such a high dose. i recommend next time you start lower, way lower. And hitting it as fast as you can as hard as you can, with a large dose, is going to be an extremely strong experience.

Some good links to info you could read in my sig.
Open your Mind () Please read my DMT vaping guide () Fear is the mind killer

"Energy flows where attention goes"

[Please review the forum Wiki and FAQ before posting questions]
 
cyb
#4 Posted : 10/27/2012 7:45:51 PM

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anrchy wrote:
hey, just some advice. break that into paragraphs so its easier to read, I read the first several sentences but just couldnt do it.


I was gonna say the same...got a few words in and went boss eyed and gave up...maybe later!Smile
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hug46
#5 Posted : 10/27/2012 8:08:19 PM

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I tried to soldier thru your tawdry tale , likewise it was very hard to read, a few paragraphs would be a godsend.
One like this , for instance.
Sounds to me like you did too much and these older people certainly did not have your best interests at heart, in fact they sound like tossers if you"ll excuse my base language. Being younger than them you succumbed to peer pressure maybe?
As for the ejaculation thing,like a wet dream? Or a sensitive member needing to shed its load? I don"t know. That one is beyond me i"m afraid but no bad thing. A drug induced orgasm sounds quite cool ive had a few mentasms but ive never blown my wad.
By the way the indentations arnt working on my post so maybe you were paragraphing and it just came out like that ,if so apologies.
 
anrchy
#6 Posted : 10/27/2012 8:15:07 PM

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hug46 wrote:
By the way the indentations arnt working on my post so maybe you were paragraphing and it just came out like that ,if so apologies.


I dont think indentations work, you have to separate the paragraphs using the "ENTER" key.
Open your Mind () Please read my DMT vaping guide () Fear is the mind killer

"Energy flows where attention goes"

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hug46
#7 Posted : 10/27/2012 8:20:32 PM

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anrchy wrote:
hug46 wrote:
By the way the indentations arnt working on my post so maybe you were paragraphing and it just came out like that ,if so apologies.


I dont think indentations work, you have to separate the paragraphs using the "ENTER" key.

thankyou anrchy, i have just noticed in another post aswell!

this is much better now!



 
dosbrains
#8 Posted : 10/27/2012 9:05:21 PM
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Sorry for the block of text, everyone. My formatting vanished. Is there a way to edit? Also, has anyone heard of a place beyond the void?
 
anrchy
#9 Posted : 10/27/2012 9:40:12 PM

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dosbrains wrote:
Sorry for the block of text, everyone. My formatting vanished. Is there a way to edit? Also, has anyone heard of a place beyond the void?


On the top right hand corner of your OP is a button that says "edit"

Use the enter key to break up the txt
Open your Mind () Please read my DMT vaping guide () Fear is the mind killer

"Energy flows where attention goes"

[Please review the forum Wiki and FAQ before posting questions]
 
dosbrains
#10 Posted : 10/28/2012 2:49:32 AM
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bcmonke wrote:
I haven't had a trip last nearly that long or take on the head melting scariness that yours seems to of. But I have had what I could only describe as small flashbacks.

My very first trip I heard a tone, resonating out of everything. Every now and then while I lay in bed, I can hear that tone slowly work its way back in to the world. Its always the same. My eyes start to dart back and forth in my head, dim 2d visuals, then after a few minutes it fades away. Only part that concerns me is I'll usually have a headache the next day.



Yes! It's very to similar to that. Now that I have had some time to sit back and contemplate the matter, It seems that they were flash backs. Yet, they were very real. My body was covered with an intense chill, my left leg began twitching and jumping, and my brain felt completely fuzzy and had a constant tingling sensation. It felt like my whole body and mind was being pulled by a magnet, and I was fighting for it to remain in place.
 
Mystic0
#11 Posted : 10/28/2012 3:13:03 AM

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Your first experience sounds somewhat similar to mine just on a slightly higher scale, I also didn't know how much we were dosing (very ignorant). I was terrified. Utterly utterly terrified, no void like you're talking of, other things but they still scared me so much I just can't even begint o describe it but, it was beautiful all in the same regard and taught me so much I cannot even again, begin to describe it.

Upon smoking marijuana after my trip, 4-5 days after, I was instantly being thrown back into the beginnings of a DMT state. DMT opens up new pathways in the brain, some that have been closed for a very long time due to social conditioning or what not, (this is how a friend explained it to me) so drugs have new pathways to explore, leading to similar DMT like feelings.

I wouldn't let this trip get to you so much, I think what you're speaking of is truly beautiful, you need give your head time to digest what it's seen. Don't fret, the nexus understands what you're going through, feel free to talk about anything on here, that's what it's for. To share experience.

I think what you're describing, sounds like a profound lesson for yourself, I would give yourself time and jump back in, see what you think after the amazement isn't so in your face and make a true judgement.

Quality report, thanks for a brilliant read, I really hope you're ok and you get through whatever fears you're having now Smile there is always a light and it shines brighly for all of us.

Much love.
One can drive himself to madness in the obsessing goal of reason, without the knowledge of love and laughter.
 
Guyomech
#12 Posted : 10/28/2012 5:25:10 AM

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Ok, where to begin?

For starters, the first three hits you took, and the experience that followed, sound like a medium to high breakthrough dose, 40-60mg or something like that. The void is a fairly common theme (I've been there on shrooms and acid, but not DMT... But I know of others who have). A keen sense of the breathing and/or heartbeat, with some kind of mortality contemplation attached to it, is not unusual at all... I experience some form of this most times I've taken DMT.

As far as the judgemental chatter in the room, I'd say there's a strong possibility that much of that was in your mind. They may have been whispering, and may even have been genuinely concerned. But on dark trips on any substance, you can see the world through a lens of paranoia that feels exactly as you describe here.

Now that second trip... Yikes. As you've probably already concluded, the tolerance thing is kind of a myth, and that 1-hour cooldown period is not necessary. In my experience, though, going again before the first trip ends can lead to murkier experiences, almost like two programs are running at the same time in your brain. So waiting a bit between trips does have its advantages.

My only bad DMT trip was because of doing too much... Around six hits, like you. And the set/setting were all wrong, plus I had a cold... Anyway, it was astonishingly amazing for the first few seconds, then devolved quickly into a manic tied-to-a-car-and-dragged experience that seemed to last forever. So: use a scale!

As far as the wet dream part of it goes... I really can't comment on that, but I'm glad to hear this whole thing had a happy ending!
 
 
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