I was once tripping so hard on LSD that I flushed some shrooms down the toilet because I swore to never do hallucinogens again, years later I still regret that rash decision.

I love the postings about people who thought they would be stuck tripping or in hyperspace forever, that is so funny because that has happened to me so many times, and of course every time I came back fine (I think)...


One time I was in hyperspace and the people in the apartment next door were moving in. They were hammering nails in the wall on the other side of me, and throwing boxes and stuff against the wall. At first I imagined that someone was knocking on the door, but I calmly thought to myself, "Oh well, you can knock all you want but I am not going anywhere, I am not here."
I also usually put the phone in another room, I used to turn it off, but one time I forgot and it started going off during breakthrough. At first I ignored it, but then started to freak out that it might be important, like somebody died or something, so I got up, walked across the room and checked it out, but it was nothing, I then proceeded to walk around the room tripping balls on DMT, then going into the living room and the like. I was in utter amazement that I could walk around and enjoy all that I saw instead of sitting in the same spot. It is something that one could be amazed that one can just walk in such a state, I never tried talking yet

happened about 2 weeks ago... was sitting with a friend by the lake (a very safe distance)... he was sitting a little forward of me, & got one of those bellringer tokes off a joint... i was already eyes closed, entering the wormhole, when he laid back &, well, kinda started flailing... one good fist to the dick later & that was it for me... no fun at all...

Well I don't have any DMT breakthrough stories to report, because I haven't made it there yet (though not for lack of trying.) But since some people are sharing horror stories of other chemicals I've got one of those.

Back in 1980something when I was about 18 I had a truly terrifying experience on LSD. Now most people when they say they had a "bad trip", they mean they went to an unpleasant place in their minds, maybe heard or saw things they didn't like, something along those lines. And I'm sure that can be pretty upsetting. But I have a hard time imagining it being as bad as experiencing that at the SAME TIME as being in a situation of real physical danger, as well as one that endangers everyone else around you.

Without going too much into all the mundane details that led up to it, basically due to a combination of bad timing, bad decisions, bad 'friends', and bad luck, I wound up driving around in my car (which I was also living in at the time, along with my cat), totally lost on the highways of a major city, tripping balls on 3 hits of this gel stuff called "black pyramid".

Long story shortish I dosed up planning on tripping with my friends then everyone else's plans changed all of a sudden for some reason and I was left hanging. I thought I could make it to another friend's house before the stuff kicked in but instead it hit me hard on the way there and soon not only couldn't figure out how to get where I wanted to go, I couldn't even understand how to safely get off the road. The damn thing wouldn't hold still long enough. Plus the semis and other cars going by had me shitting bricks and too scared to try to slow down or change lanes.

I clearly remember the road rolling at me in waves and crashing over the hood of my camaro, and also that during part of it I thought I was on some kind of space roller coaster. Then there was this whole mental trip that was going on at the same time about my entire life being this endless roller coaster that I couldn't escape. I KNEW with absolute certainty that I was trapped living through all the same mistakes and hardships over and over again for all eternity, and I KNEW that the cops were after me and I was just about to get to the part where I would be hauled away to prison.

Honestly I really can't explain how I survived, and didn't kill anyone else during the time I was on the road, which was probably an hour or more. But as fate would have it instead of getting nabbed by the cops and fulfilling my "prophecy" or ending my trip in a firey crash I ended up following one of the highways out of the city into the country where it wasn't QUITE as terrifying, and as it started to get dark I either ran out of gas or finally managed to get myself off the road, and just laid on the hood of my car for the rest of the night, still freaking the fuck out and certain I was doomed.

Up until this experience, I'd had nothing but good times with acid. But from that day on every time I tried it, I got caught back up in that exact same mental loop about my impending doom and how I was stuck suffering through this one meaningless lifetime over and over. After awhile and several more bad experiences I gave up trying, and didn't touch psychedelics again for about the next 20 years. But I don't think that really solved the problem, I just ran from it. In retrospect I feel like that experience has afected me in normal sober life as well, and I regard the imprint it made on me as something very much like PTSD.

So now I've now finally come to a point in my life where I feel ready to try and repair the damage, and have been using low doses of mushrooms and DMT as a tool to help me with this. I'm sure most people would think I'm crazy to go about trying to heal myself this way, but I'm being very careful and respectful of these substances this time around, and so far it seems to be working pretty well for me.

I was doing some pharmahuasca with a buddy and nothing was really happening so we sat in the living room to smoalk. We ordered a pizza about 5 minutes prior, and figured we had the perfect amount of time to blast off. Well with the maoi flowing I only needed one hit and was waaay higher than I have been before. I barely remember the next five minutes, but was startled to hear a knock on the door. At the peak of the breakthrough the knocks were loud and abruptive, and I was scared it could be the police. But then I remembered it was the pizza guy(to this day, the FASTEST pizza delivery ever!!!!), so tripping 100% I tried to leap up and make my way to my room for my money.

The next couple minutes were the most difficult I've ever had. I could surprisingly walk okay, but my vision was swimming with ether energies and I couldn't see anything. I found my wallet and my friend by this time had answered the door. It took another 2 minutes of staring into the folds before I realized what money was and how value worked. My roomies just paid up their rent so I had huge bills and nothing made sense in the moment. Felt like an awkward dream that I would be caught in forever. Luckily everything was back to base after 15 minutes and my friend helped coordinate the exchange. But definitely my most intensely challenging trip.

1st acid trip was more than I was ready for, what with being at a dance at the local synagogue and all... A janitor there tried to get me to drink cheap wine with him. His face was changing shapes though, so I didn't want what he was having. I faked sick so I could go lie down in the lounge. I looked up at the ceiling and the checkered pattern went off in all directions infinitely, there were no walls. This freaked me out, so I rolled over and next thing I was flying through the grain in the leather of the couch like it was the Grand Canyon and I was a bird. It was HUGE in there.

I eventually got way into it once I was at home and in my own bed, but for quite a while I was wondering what I would do if I never came down... I decided I would just never say a word and only I would know.

Once while starting to get to the peak on acid my roommate's Great Dane decided to have diarrhea all over the place, like from one end of the room to the other. I guess my vibe was just too much for her to handle. I almost had it all cleaned up when my puppy decided to do the same. So I had to do another entire (but smaller) cleanup. The I got the runs too, but I made it to the toilet. It was too bizarre to be upset about, and I was laughing and retching the whole time.

Cut my hand open badly and had to go get stitches while still tripping. I was pretty detached from the body, and it actually wasn't all that bad. Other times when I was not high, the stitches ordeal was actually worse.

Back in High School days did a drug I am not proud of and will not identify here, and found myself walking down the street absolutely certain that I was 2 feet off the ground. My only thought was, "Shit, if anyone sees me up here they're going to know I'm high." Made perfect sense at the time.

Did the same drug another time and a friend said he had to leave. I sat down and suddenly I was certain it was a full year later. I was SO worried about how much trouble I would get in that it never occurred to me that someone would have noticed me at some point during that year. I turned to another friend and asked how long I had been sitting there. He said, "About a minute, I guess." I looked out front and my other friend had not even drove off in his car yet. That was one of the things that made me decide to stop doing that drug for good.

Did too much of yet a different bad drug in High School English class and felt very sick. Went to the health room complaining of stomach illness just to get of there. While lying down in bed I drifted off but was still aware of my surroundings when suddenly this huge snarling German Shepherd dog was snapping and biting at me from the edge of the cot. I sat up and was ready to yell, "Hey! There's a German Shepherd in here!!!" but I realized just in time that he was gone. I'm not sure how I would have explained.

There are others. but these are some of the stand-out moments.

I have had a great many entertaining, enriching and enlightening moments too that I don't think would have happened if I had not been tripping, and I have long since learned to journey in a more responsible fashion, I am happy to say. This is just what happens when you have to discover this stuff without a sanctioned space in society for such explorations, I guess.

I once double dropped two pills of MDA and spent two hours wandering around a party 3 feet behind my body, watching the back of my head/body walking around.
Finally found a quiet dark corner a curled up till I came down a bit....
Very freaky...

The following happened about three years ago and was a result of improper mental preparation. At this point in my DMT usage, I did not ritualize the experience; I simply “let it ride”. I hope some of you can learn from my mistake. Spice should be used as a tool for exploring consciousness and a medicine for healing, not as a method to escape your problems.

It was the middle of winter and I was wearing nothing but a robe and some boxers. I was sitting on a few blankets in my living room and felt the call. I loaded up 50 mgs in a “meth pipe” and spent about 30 seconds preparing myself. I held the lighter under the glass bulb and waited for the spice to begin to vaporize and took my first hit.

After the second inhalation, I knew something was wrong. I wanted to “abort mission” with every muscle in my body. Unfortunately, it was too late. For some reason I stood up and approached the exit of my townhouse. Once I opened the door to the outside, I thought I had entered the afterlife. I didn’t think I was dead, I KNEW I was dead. I looked around at the darkness as the wind and snow blew through the courtyard. I felt completely alone and abandoned.

As I proceeded to walk outside in my bare feet, my world started closing in on me. It was as if I had entered into an M.C. Escher painting. I tried to avoid the different walls, staircases, and shapes as they encapsulated me, but I couldn’t. An overwhelming feeling of claustrophobia overtook me. At this point, I closed my eyes so I didn’t have to see what was happening, which didn’t help at all. I saw many different spirits laughing and taunting me as they told me that I had brought this on myself. They communicated to me: “Since you want to trip in this manner all the time, you’ve gotten your wish. You will spend eternity tripping in pain and confusion”.

I can only imagine what it would have looked like to anyone watching. I began grabbing my head and spinning in circles trying to make it stop as I ran throughout the courtyard. I couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted to die completely. I didn’t want to be in the afterlife, I wanted to cease existing on every level. The only thing I could think to do was dive headfirst into a snow pile. I had given up.

I blacked out for a certain period, and when I came to, I was completely covered in snow, but still thought I was in the afterlife. I saw a door (which was my neighbors door who I didn’t know) and by reflex tried to get in. Thank God it was late enough that no one answered. If someone had, and I would have asked, “Hey, what are you doing in my afterlife?” I would have definitely been in some deep trouble.

After I realized the door was locked, I turned around and saw my dog wandering around the entrance to my apartment, and I realized I was back in reality. I immediately ran inside my apartment and hugged the floor as I realized I was still alive. I was bleeding from quite a few different areas, as I had been violently thrashing in a mixture of ice and snow while being mostly naked.

Once the euphoria of still being alive wore off, the paranoia of wondering if anyone had seen it set it. I kept peering out of my windows waiting for the cops. I saw a couple of younger guys smoking cigarettes on their balcony. I don’t know if they saw it, but if they did, they got one hell of a show!

Thankfully, the cops never came. I will never forget this experience, and I have not haphazardly taken the sacrament since. I now always spend at least 30 minutes meditating and preparing my mind to determine if the time is right.

Much love to all of you. I hope no one else ever has to go through something like this.

Peace and Happy Journeys.

Ate a huge chunk of a Grateful Dead ticket stub that was used to mop up some crystal wash. I was hanging out in the parking lot at Soldier Field. I was tripping so hard when all of a sudden a bunch of Chicago police came and started kicking people off of the lot. I couldn't find my ride. I ended up wandering the city. I was hearing murders ,seeing junkies...it was the most filthy, disgusting trip. I ended up coming down enough and was able to make a trade for a ride. I saw/heard/felt all of the vice in Chicago that night.

intense.

This wasn't during a breakthrough, but it happened mid-pharma:

I'd gotten a kitten three days ago with the hope that she would decimate the mouse population in my house. I had set glue traps all over the place and cleared them all prior to her arrival. All except a few glue traps in my room, by the door.

So, I'm in the middle of a productive pharma trip when I hear a great commotion outside my room. My dog was going nuts, I heard screaming. I open the door and see my lovely little kitten, Dr. Claw, flopping around madly trying to free herself from the glue trap she became stuck in. She'd evidently gotten stuck by scooping her paw under the door, trying to get in, and the trap got her paw, and when she pulled the paw back she got hopelessly stuck. My dog was freaking out, and I locked him in his cage.

I begin to panic and say to the kitten over and over again: "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry . . .", with my hands on my face, a look of horror painted across it like I just witnessed a baby being ground up in a blender.

"What have I done? What have I done??" I said. "I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!"

I was completely and totally, in my pharma state, convinced that I had to kill the kitten, that there was no other way to free her from the glue trap.

I paced back and forth, trying to steel myself for the horrible task set before me. I wander around the house thinking of the quickest, most pain free way I could think of. I decide to just snap her neck and get it over with. I reach down, grip her neck and begin to twist. She screams and flops and shits herself and I let go. I can't do it like this, I thought . . .

I go outside, still thinking of a way to kill her. I have cathartic visions of myself weeping in the backyard as I did her grave.

I get a shovel from the shed. I'll cut her head off, neat and quick.

I put on a pair of noise-cancelling ear phones so I don't have to hear her scream. I stand over her with the shovel, not letting myself cry, there will be plenty of time for that later. As stand over her with the shovel, I worry about damaging the wood floor. Strange, but that was my concern. I give a feeble blow with the shovel and thank all that is holy that I missed. I can't do it this way, either.

I go back outside. I get a cinder block. The plan is to lower it on her head and stomp on it. I got the cinder block, still wearing the ear protection.

I couldn't do it that way either. Too messy. I think of something else, the final killing technique: I planned to get a grocery bag and suffocate her. I put on thick dish washing gloves to protect my arms and hands from what I expect to be a violent struggle.

I kneel over her with the bag, ready to do it, and a sort of warm, calming, extraordinarily humbling realization washes over me: The kitten was stuck in a GLUE trap. All she needs is warm water to free her. I don't have to kill her!

I scoop her up, she is calm now, and take her to the bathroom. And, shaking with the horror at what would have been without question the worst thing I've ever done, I wash Dr. Claw in the tub and free her from the glue trap.

I feel a sense of redemption, awe, humility. I spend the rest of the night giving thanks as Dr. Claw lay on my chest purring her little heart out.

That trip taught me a lot. About humility, about the responsible use of DMT, and about the pure goodness, love, and forgiveness that animals offer us. That Dr. Claw can completely forgive me in an instant for what would have been a great sin, makes her a better person than me. I only hope to live up to the example set by my cat and dog. They truly are better people than me.

It's now a year later and Dr. Claw is doing very well. And so am I.

Not my breakthrough, but I was sitting for my friend—

My friend has plenty of experience with aya, but none with vaping. She also has kids so can’t get out much at night. She pops by during the day to try. I usually choose to travel at night for the quiet and lack of interruptions.

So my friend has her pipe, lays back on the bed and closes her eyes. I sit for a couple of minutes as she flies away.

My phone goes off.

I normally turn off all the electronics I can when I travel, especially my phone. Not knowing what to do I get out of the room and walk downstairs, answering my phone as I went. Just as I am doing this I can see my door opening. Very odd, maybe it is the builders next door?

I go to the door to see them. Two rather large men. A wallet comes out. A card shown. The police!

The police had been told our house was being burgled and there were these two walking in to check it out as my door was unlocked! Luckily I kept the shaking inside of me neatly packed away. No we haven’t been burgled. They left, telling me to look after my security a bit more.

That was one lucky phone call. To have them walk up the stairs and find me in my room with an unconscious girl and a GVG on the side might have created some difficult questions!

It’s fairly unlikely I will break from my system of only flying after midnight again.

Secondary bummer. We had actually been ripped off too, just took until my friend left to find that she had her bike stolen :/

I have had someone give me a very intense hug when I was tripping and that leaked through into the trip. I could see his outline come through the trip and it turned dark red / black. The colors were freightening and so was the fact that someone was holding me unexpectedly.

Second bad happening was that I dosed too much, passed out and woke up in a 2.5m wide puddle of vomit, covering my entire couch, myself, the carpet. It's a shame I didn't have a camera pointed at me because I'm quite sure that must have been a fountain of vomit flying out of me.