I've been frequenting the nexus for about two years now, looking at teks and absorbing information about people's experiences. The nexus appears to me to be a unique community with much to offer in the way of information and guidance. SWIM even attempted a featured tek about a year ago using M hostilis root bark powder but was unsuccessful in extracting anything. He now finds himself in a position where he is able to obtain ayahuasca and finds himself apprehensive at the verge of opening that door to realms unknown. I have never done a psychedelic before, and lately find myself delving deep into others trip reports trying to imagine experiencing the things they do. So for the sake of scientific documentation and camaraderie in perspective, i commit myself and the record of my development as an astral-planer to the vaults of the nexus.
I try to be honest with myself, and consider myself mentally diverse enough to explore any perspective, but ayahuasca's ego-destroying nature has got me a bit apprehensive. I worry that i will crash to bits in the realization of the infinite or lose focus in life, but i also feel a sort of craving for the redefinition of perspective. either way you all will be sure to hear about it in the next few weeks. P.S. SWIM has the option to try mushrooms or ayahuasca as his first experience. I'm leaning towards shrooms, but would like your informed input. Thanks.

You sound like you have your head screwed on so i'm sure that ayahuasca will be very advantageous to you.

Being honest with yourself like you said is a great gift and ayahuasca will help you further explore the truth about yourself and life in general. Just be prepared for anything and you will be fine.

Even if dmt does bite you in the ass you sound like you have the mental capabilty to deal with it. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

Welcome

I respect your honesty alot..
that is a very good start to what your seeking,and will aid you..
do the research and do the homework,you have some fear,everyone who has truly brokthrough understands.
i say this alot,and its true..i have spent my life doing the most dangerous jobs around..
to me nothing is braver then the ones who make this leap..

the first time i did it it made me cry,from what it showed me,and im one tough s.o.b
after a few jumps ,it showed me what dying felt like,and then death..
this is not to change your mind,just to help you understand what can happen.
With that being said,i would not change a thing. i came to it because i had lost faith in so many things.
with a sad an angry heart..for me it changed me in a way i can truly never express,but for the good.

Trip reports are nice ,but never really close,imo
your heart seems true,i think you will do well..

wishing you the very best of luck in all you seek..
Oden

I'd say go for it. All the way.
Men do not sail if they can't learn to swim, to fight for air with elbow and foot.
But there can be no swimming until one learns to plunge.

Welcome. all the best.

Thank you all for the warm welcome. Thymamai, you sound like my inner epic hero voice, a voice i intend to follow more often. This forum emanates a "carpe diem" aura, which is what attracted me in part. I feel that the natural progression of the urge for experience brings many others like me to the nexus. Not in a reckless way mind you, but in the spirit of unabashed wanderlust. It is difficult to convey this urge to those around me, but here in cyber space i see many kindred spirits. I look forward to speaking at length with any who approach the emergence of home-based entheogen use and synthesis from a perspective of scientific interest and philosophical openness. I am young, (19 in fact) and I feel that i have much to learn from all of you, but especially those of you with scientific backgrounds since that is the direction i'm heading in school. I have a passionate interest in the field of mycology mostly due to the writings of renowned Mycologist Paul Stamets. I want to explore life's pinnacles and back alleys but I feel that my ultimate goal is to contribute to the improvement of the social structure through scientific innovation. I'm particularly interested in agriculture, architecture and engineering in regards to my generation's challenge of integrating ecological design into the equation of human happiness. That sounds like a lofty goal coming from a nineteen year old I know. But if there's any place to be honest about your character and aspirations then why not the internet!?! To know me as a classmate you might see the community college Joe-schmo. But you on the nexus now know me in a way not many do. So drink it in you lucky schmucks. And yes i'm naked.

Welcome to the Nexus!

Why did your first extraction fail? Do you know exactly what happened? Was the bark from good source?

Ayahuasca is so special, it can be as loving and caring as it can be heavy and humbling. Usually it gives you what you need, instead of what you want, at least in my experience. I think the most important is that you take care with preparation (set/setting) and integration. Did you read our health and safety section?

As for shrooms or aya for first time, I cannot say, go for whatever you feel is right

BTW, nice about mycology, Paul Stamets is awesome! Be sure to keep us informed on your development!

My First extraction failed, because I used a tek (I don't remember which) which described the napatha pull as necessarily colored or tinted. Since my napatha was still clear post-pull, I was discouraged and discarded what was probably a DMT-containing batch. Since then I have attempted drinking ayahuasca, which failed to cause visual effects and was generally an unpleasant experience what with the vomiting and all. More recently (this morning in fact), I tried freebasing crystalline DMT which i extracted with Q21Q21's tek. Although the extraction was successful, When I went to smoke it, there was no apparent effects. I am at a loss and would appreciate any advice in this matter on my other post located here So what did I just smoke? Q21Q21's tek help!