I’m no newcomer to psychedelics or DMT...the latter I have ingested in the form of ayahuasca, both in Peru and here in the UK, I’ve taken my own pharma concoctions, and I have smoked it on numerous occasions. However my first and only DMT breakthrough experience definitely ranks as one of the most amazing things to have ever happened to me.

I had a new and particularly clean looking batch of spice, and having switched to caapi changa as my spice smoke of choice, I thought I would smoke some freebase spice with my glass pipe, it being a long time since I’d done so. In the course of the evening I’d had maybe two beers and a few spliffs, it being the weekend (wouldn’t usually mix alcohol and spice) and prior to smoking I had taken two 100mg 5-HTP capsules. I thought I should give some background as I think there may have been some interaction going on. I thought the 5-HTP may produce an interesting synergy, at night it being converted into melatonin.

So...new batch of spice, same glass pipe as used previously, smoking technique more or less the same...but a very different result. For around ten minutes before hand I did some mindfulness breathing meditation to relax me and still my mind before taking the plunge. I thought the dose I used as around 50mg (eyeballed..) but I’m thinking it was maybe a lot more than this (later measurements with a scale [recommended!] put the amount nearer to 100mg (at least)!

I took the pipe, and used a candle to heat the pipe and get the vapours flowing which seemed to work very well, then I took a good lungful...I felt a shift very quickly...I set the pipe down...and then BAM! I heard and felt this very audible and tangible crack in my head...something reminiscent of ice or glass shattering, and electricity...at this moment, the rational part of me was fully convinced I had just killed myself, that there was no way I was coming back from that...at that point I was torn away from this reality and my body...I seemed to ‘come to’ to find some very powerful alien force trying to wrest control of my mind or consciousness. There was not even a millisecond here to contemplate having another hit from the pipe! I've never been hit by this speed or intensity by DMT ever before. I usually would persevere but this hit me like an electric psychedelic tsunami. Of my time alive on Earth, the pure, exquisite, primal terror experienced in those few minutes were well and truly beyond anything I have ever experienced before...I have had the DMT terrors once before, smoking around 100mg while on pharma...but this eclipsed that particular incident. The experience felt incredibly electric, I was enveloped by a fierce and awesome energy...the experience was the most intense, magical, alien, bizarre, terrifying, deep, profound and beautiful of my life. It was truly ineffable...words don’t mean much there, they really lack the power to describe such experiences. Interspersed with very powerful DMT imagery, I experienced full blown and very detailed visions of my life...like my life flashing before my eyes. These happened at a crazy break neck speed, I would be shown this interdimensional montage or flipbook incredibly rapidly and then I would be teleported between these different highly detailed memories and places in my mind...but I was there reliving them. Reality was completely replaced by ultra-realistic other places, it was like time travel or teleportation, or some ultra-advanced alien technology as opposed to a drug experience! It was curious, the places I went to. I recall going to this indoor environment, somewhere in between a kitchen and a lab in feel...a very clean, sterile environment. It's planeness almost made it more intriguing, giving how powerfully I was altered! It sounds strange, this environment I experiences, but I've heard fellow DMT trippers describe very similar sounding environments. What I experienced felt utterly IMPOSSIBLE in a way I simply can't describe in words. During the experience, the feeling of love for people in my life, family and friends, was like a grounding lantern or beacon. I had quite noticeable tremors on re-entry. I’ve never had a drug experience as vivid as this, and I never remember experiencing such vivid and detailed visions on DMT ever before. Usually it is a very alien but beautiful experience for me...this was both very alien and other worldly while also very personal as well.

This experience was very special to me. NO previous dabbling with psychedelics...DMT included...could have prepared me for the depth or power of this experience, it was far beyond anything experienced previously. I didn’t encounter any entities as such...I haven’t yet via DMT...but I really feel I got a glimpse of or connected to something very deep and very powerful. I feel really very grateful for the experience, despite it scaring the hell out of me at the same time!

It is funny as prior to the experience I had been thinking that maybe DMT was a tad overrated in some ways...I knew it was unique and very powerful stuff...but I thought maybe, just maybe...it was a tad over-hyped!! Well I don’t think that any more. It’s weird because you come down from that state, the universe folds back in on itself to conform to sober serotonin mode, and you lose that ability to see or describe or bring back much of what was experienced. But I remember feeling...while in that state...I was experiencing something deeply powerful and mysterious, to put it lightly. Like witnessing actual supernatural magic, or "God" and I'm not speaking metaphorically! And I like to think I’m a pretty rational and sceptical guy, I'm a scientist in my sober waking life, but this blew my mind in a way it has never ever been blown before, and I definitely have more agnostic leanings following this experience. It seems to me that life and consciousness may be much more deeper and mysterious than they appear on the surface, in a way I can't express or explain in words. And hey, even if it is nothing more than highly elaborate and spectacular aberration of brain chemistry, then that alone is still amazing...what an utterly incredible thing the brain is!!

I can also see the advantage of smoked, pure freebase DMT over other methods of ingestion, including changa (and I love my changa) on occasion...the sheer, raw power of it is crystal clear and straight to the point. To be honest though, not something I have any particular desire to "chase", and my DMT usage since this experience has been less.

I can also see the advantage of smoked, pure freebase DMT over other methods of ingestion, including changa (and I love my changa) on occasion...the sheer, raw power of it is crystal clear and straight to the point.

Hope I didn’t ramble too much...quite cathartic to share such an experience with others who understand where you’re coming from! I know a few such people, but they are in the minority!

Happy trails Nexus!!

I'm still wondering how exactly I am supposed to live on this rock after having experienced that. Welcome back to our little planet. Things couldn't get any weirder.

"It’s weird because you come down from that state, the universe folds back in itself to conform to sober serotonin mode, and you lose that ability to see or describe or bring back much of what was experienced"

That is one of the weirdest parts about DMT. Comming down can be like grasping at sand as it slips through your fingers..

imo encountering entities isn't a mark fora deep dmt trip. I've been in hyperspacial photo shoots (whatever I am vain I guess) and if I opened my eyes I could clearly still see my friend.


what really gets my gourd is wrapped up into a think nugget is that these states of existence go far beyond hyperspatial photoshoots. It's the mental ticks that come into play with this fella that separates him from the rest.



Melt into the divine and find amazement in the simple.

Proto - I agree that entities aren't always a mark of a deep trip, some of my deepest have been completely entity free. Then again...



There is something odd going on here! So strange how people's trips share similarities - here is a quote from my last earth shaker:

"The whole room was swirling, and I felt relief. The air in the room was one of jubilation, it felt like there was a party being thrown in my honour and what kept circulating in my head was that the Nexus was there in spirit. It was like a halloween party - this is the best way I can describe how the room looked - yes, a fractal halloween party, and the entities shooting about the room were Nexians, I knew this intuitively."

I would be interested to see how often the Nexus pops up in people's journeys. I would hazard a guess that we are not the only ones

Congratulations on the breakthrough Bancupoma. The "life review" you had sounds surreal. I hope that DMT will privy me to one before I die

Thanks all. It's really special to have this community where one can share such experiences, and compare notes with fellow travellers, to be met with recognition of the depth of terrain covered, not disbelief, or worse. The internet is an amazing tool in this regard, connecting fellow travellers from all over the world...amazing really! This isn't the kind of experience I could share with everyone!

jamie - I like the sands falling though hands description...yes it's a lot like that. And no House things couldn't get any weirder!!

It has been a few days now since the experience, but the power of it hasn't dimmed in my mind. And I can almost recall a few moments....maybe in a highly edited serotonin mode version...but I feel incredibly lucky and fortunate to have been graced with such an experience. It's funny too as I really wasn't expecting either. I'm not the type of guy who is prone to the terrors in these realms or who throws the words 'spiritual' or 'divine' around at all, and being a scientist in training one is trained to think objectively, rationally, sceptically, but these few crazy minutes have definitely shifted things for me, opened me up, at the very least, to new possibilities I was not previously aware of. This experience has blown apart what I thought I knew previously, I KNOW in my core I got a very precious glimpse into something incredibly deep, powerful and mysterious. Yes at the time I was altered, having ingested at the time a very powerful psychedelic compound...but at the time that seemed pretty irrelevant. The important thing was I was THERE, experiencing that! I dunno though, I'm gonna quit rambling now.

What an incredible universe we live in!