The GVG sits on my desk, locked and loaded, couldn't be more than 20mg( My scales don't weigh properly) of fresh spice together with an unidentifiable quantity of previous unvaped residues on the screens and glass wall. "Digeridoo and nature sounds plays on my "I pod "docking station, filling the room with a relaxing vibration.
Tonight seems right, I feel calm, though a faint underlying sadness pervades my mood ,but with low anxiety levels. Yes tonight does indeed seem oportune for giving up an emotion laden physical existance , and I pick up the delicate glass vaping device
I melt the fresh spice into the screens and take a few tentative pulls, My butane torch lighter is "sticking on the flame position and won't turn itself off, mmm, this is dangerous I mull ,as I feel a vibrational wave of sub-breakthrough effects coming on. The effects are weak, but it feels "right". I light up again and the ceramic filter turns Orange-red, the GVG turns white as I inhale deeply, managing a second quick toke of whats left. This is it, I feel it coming on as I franticaly shake the faulty torch lighter to try and get it to turn off before I 'm gone. ( managed only just in time)*
How to describe visions, colours, space and perception that lie outside the range of normal human experience? All the prose of great poets, the canvases of great artists cannot even scrape the surface of it.
So what can I offer in way of explanation? not much, but it's irelevant as I tell this story in the most part to those who know where I'm coming from.
My seated body begins to fizz . 10 seconds in, there is no longer a concept of "me", as "it" ( my body) lies motionless, no breathing, heartbeat, just a static vehicle, like an abandoned car at the side of a road, even that recedes into nothingness.
Fantastic patterns and energy fields fill my conciousness, as I am lifted up into a higher realm of multidemsional evolving visuals, I sense that I'm "onboard" something, not classic sci-fi stuff, but nevertheless a transportation vehicle of some sort, complex brightly lit circuitory boards, futuristic panels bearing constantly changing mind blowingly beautiful "art-nouveau "motifs fill my visual field but in every conceivable dimension, above, below, behind, to both sides, inside, outside and every side at once! And the entities came to me ( the term "me" doesn't really apply here, but you know what I mean), pilots or navigators of this stange craft. "Look my friend" "look at this", "don't you get it yet"? "Ah yes he's begining to understand" As each time they gently zoom toward me with ever more indescribable objects, some which actually swallow me up into yet further beautiful interactions that become ever more impossible to decribe.
The underlying message is one of "promise" , they are showing me what is ultimately going to happen and that there is no need to worry too much about life.
As I slowly regained sensataion and awarness of my body, I already have tears welling up in my eyes, gratitude, emotional overloading overwhelm me, as I go from seated to lying on the floor, gently sobbing for some 5 mins as I experience an emotional release of great intensity. The trip was just too intense to behave otherwise.
I writethis post trip , one hour.
*Note: Torch lighters that don't turn off when releasing the button are very dangerous , I'm ditching this faulty one as of now.
Peace