Ever since the first lucid dream I've been working this with a great deal of intention and focus. I think and meditate on it a lot. As I fall asleep I tell myself it is my intention to have a lucid dream, to wake up in my dream and realize it. I have taken up the infrequent practice of "reality checking," looking at the back of my hand or some fine detailed text or numerical information, looking away, then checking again to see if it's the same or even readable.
Well, I am pleased to report I am having success.
This is so exciting. I thank DMT for opening me up to this. I've been interested in and wanting to have lucid dreams for a couple of decades, ever since I first heard about them.
The initial manifestations were close . . .. but I would awaken before the moment of lucidity. The themes seem to involve embarrassment, self-consciousness, recognition that something is wrong, etc.
1.) This one was within a few days of the first: I was talking to a woman, I don't know who, but I was sure it was a Nexian. I was trying to tell her about Opticus. I accidentally sprayed her with a bit of spittle from my mouth, between my excitement and missing tooth, this is something I must attend to. I was very apologetic and horribly embarrassed. Suddenly, I realized, WAIT! I don't get horribly embarrassed about such things, even if self-conscious. Something is wrong here. I looked around and began to get the inkling. . . . . . that my cat was pawing me, trying to encourage me to awaken to gift her with an early breakfast.
2.) This one was 3-4 days ago. As I drift off to sleep, I frequently play old radio shows from my childhood. I am a big fan of the CBS Radio Mystery Theater, hosted by E.G. Marshall. I'm listening to E.G. Marshall give an intro and as part of the intro he relates the classic tale of Antrocles & the Lion. I drift off chuckling and smiling, thinking about our very own antrocles. Next thing I know I'm in a room and there is E.G. Marshall talking about I don't know what. I look closely at him then I say, "Wait! You're E.G. Marshall! Aren't you supposed to be dead?" I look around, starting to realize . . .. . and I awaken!
3.) Last night was not the most restful - my joints have been . . . . reminding me that the name of the game is strip poker (very happy to be here playing!) . . . .and I finally gave it up around 4:15 a.m. after a lot of tossing and turning, clicking and cracking and a couple bathroom breaks. I loaded a bowl of cannabis and smoked a hit and a half. My heart wasn't in it. I read about 80 pages and actually took a couple Advil (something I don't like doing). I meditated but it only lasted about 5 mins. When my eyes opened, I thought, "Well there isn't much time left, but I'll crawl back in bed with my husband for a quick nap." Isis, my cat, slammed next to me and I was asleep instantly. . . . . then suddenly realized I was BACK in my living room with the book I had been reading in hand. Wait? Didn't I just go to bed? Whaaat? I look over and there is my husband and he's leaning over the beat up love seat at an impossible sideways angle, reaching up and over a side table, compressing and stretching himself like a man made out of pliable rubber. Oh wow! This must be a dream!
I quickly look at the back of my hand. Not very detailed and very very yellow. I look at the book - see some words. I look away. My husband is starting to stand back up and look more anthropomorphic. I look back at my hand. It is yellow and blurry and bunches of thin white hairs (very long) are coming out of it. I look at the book. The words are now senseless streams of numbers.
I am dreaming! I am lucid! This is a dream and I haven't awakened!
It felt so strangely surreal . . . . I don't know why but there was more than just a small element of borderline fearful, eerie creepiness.
I tried HARD to communicate to my husband that I was dreaming but suddenly I could not talk! It was like the I could feel the words, "This is a dream babe! I'm dreaming!" start in my head, travel down to my stomach, come up to my throat . . . and get STUCK! This was the ODDEST sensation. I could still breathe just fine. But I could not get a single word out! He looked at me strangely. I pointed to my head, my throat and the area where he had become Rubberman. He looked confused.
Finally I got it out and I kind of yelled it, "I'm dreaming - this is a dream!" He looked confused and a bit alarmed.
I felt even more creeped out. Is this really a dream? I mean I was JUST in here before I lay down . . . . my eyes opened.
Fascinating that during these lucid moments I do not necessarily feel "in control" much of the time.
Happy 11-11-11 folks. The fantastic adventure continues.
Peace & Love
"But even if nothing lasts and everything is lost, there is still the intrinsic value of the moment. The present moment, ultimately, is more than enough, a gift of grace and unfathomable value, which our friend and lover death paints in stark relief."-Rick Doblin, Ph.D. MAPS President, MAPS Bulletin Vol. XX, No. 1, pg. 2Hyperspace LOVES YOU