From the 12 December 2010
What Follows is a report of an evening that was pivotal for me in many ways.
I realized i had merely been plagued by fear up until now.
Until this point i had been having entheogenic experiences with spice, visions, travelling, etc...
Now things have change - Things have become real.
I feel i have found myself in a way i never even thought possible before.
My full self.
Hyperspace is now another state of being for me
In comfort i can navigte - aware of the rules and what i am to do
Some Methylone was consumed - when the time was right the changa came out.
NR, Aegle and myself were sitting around the fireplace - aegle on the couch and NR and myself sitting in meditative
positions on pillows.
I felt the calling and went to the freezer to get my "Happy Days!" changa Acorn (my acorn shaped small wooden container
for spice - charged with magnetite, and quarts.)
I loaded up a bowl and took 2 nice slow pulls over separated 30-40 seconds apart.
I found myself in a dark cloud, silent completely - a few months ago this scene would have caused me fear but from
from my previous work iv managed to get rid of most of the fear that i am concious of.
The methylone helped at this stage too - it makes one feel as if they could never imagine feeling bad

Out of the darkness emerged a pure black entity with blue crystal spots on his face.
The entity had sensed that i had realized that i would usually fear this scene - and gave me time to sort out my thoughts
when i was ready - he approached me
He pushed a white rectangle into my forehead - which i realized a lot of entities do - perhaps its a block - to provide communicaiton
with the entity for that timeframe - a key to the comms of that cloud.
The entity then offered me a half sphere of citrine and indicated that i should plug it into my third eye.
I put it there and the entity pushed it in - to make it stay in position
I felt my tongue tip touch the top of my mouth and i felt my eyes focus on my crown chakra
Suddenly perception changed - i was seeing - differently.
I thanked the entity for what he had done for me - and i said goodbye - he was amused by my formalities but humoured me anyway.
The scene was so permitting and i felt absorbant still so i smoked again.
I was back in another world - clear as day - lobes of reactive energy grass around my legs.
I found a bunch of my stuff from a past life - my bow, armour, my armoured eagle(it recognised me before i recognised it),
a charm bracelet full of charms made from bone, incredible metals and leather.
One charm is an energy charm that looks not of this world - it glows blue.
each charm was for and animal and each had a sound or icaro.
i learned an icaro "grass breathing"
i was there as i am here, wandering - doing my thing
I remember loads of information - that i shouldnt somehow - things i have no reference for
Spice is now something different, i recall my previous lives
Hyperspace is so much clearer - iv worked here extensively before this life.
I found posessions from my old lifes
I suddenly know many icaros - or rather i suddenly remember them again.
I suddenly have many power animals that know me on a deep level and are total allies
I have all this information or knwledge that i have no reasonable explanation for or sources or refs for
I just know it as i knew it long ago and always have, i just didnt remember, its like i woke up.
NR decided to join in
He smoked a bowl and suddenly looked a bit weird.
He was not looking normal at all - his entire face changed.
He started thrashing around a bit - looking as if he was being moved by a force external to himself.
Much like a puppet.
The spice wore off - but he didnt come back to earth - for 20 mins i tried to ground him - nothing worked.
I decided he needed to smoke spice again and had to basically hold the pipe to his lips and light it for him as he was useless.
He went in and i decided to go in same time - so i smoked right after.
As it started its majic i saw his face shift back to usual and he said - all is well.
My changa came on oddly - i felt major pressure and it was dead silent and dark.
I felt something in my chest - i thought perhaps i need to cough or something.
I felt like there were some kind of honey ladels being stirred around in my chest and stomach
I put my hand on my chest and felt whatever it was - Move !
Something the size of a baseball or rat was inside of me - moving around my midsection - totally visible to NR and Aegle
It felt as if i needed to contain it in my midsection as it moved around - doing repairs or something, this was an operation of sorts.
While it was happening i felt lighter and lighter - then suddenly it was gone.
I felt as if i had had a dna upgrade, i was stronger and lighter.
NR had also been rewired
Before this evenin i didnt beleve any of this was possible - on this physical level.
NR and myself find ourselves in the same cloud often - when smoking at the same time
So much is proving these realms as external to me - before i thought it was all a reflection of myself.(yeah same thing i know - but
the different viewpoint changes alot - i was halting my own growth for fear based reasons.)
I couldnt be happier with things
antrocles wrote:...purity of intent....purity of execution....purity of experience...
...unlike the "blind leading the blind". we are more akin to a group of blind-from-birth people who have all simultaneously been given the gift of sight but have no words or mental processing capabilites to work with this new "gift".
IT IS ONLY TO THE EXTENT THAT WE ARE WILLING TO EXPOSE OURSELVES OVER AND OVER AGAIN TO ANNIHILATION THAT WE DISCOVER THAT PART OF OURSELVES THAT IS INDESTRUCTIBLE.
Quote: ‹Jorkest› the wall is impenetrable as far as i can tell
Quote: ‹xtechre› cheese is great
He who packs ur capsules - controls your destiny.