We've Moved! Visit our NEW FORUM to join the latest discussions. This is an archive of our previous conversations...

You can find the login page for the old forum here.
CHATPRIVACYDONATELOGINREGISTER
DMT-Nexus
FAQWIKIHEALTH & SAFETYARTATTITUDEACTIVE TOPICS
12NEXT
How many SWIMs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Options
 
FelixsMom
#1 Posted : 9/3/2008 4:12:39 AM

Beverly


Posts: 53
Joined: 03-Aug-2008
Last visit: 08-Apr-2016
Location: Gaia
I just had to copy/paste this little gem for your <grinning> pleasure

How many forum members does it takes to change a light bulb?


1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.



Rolling eyes
"If you rely only on your eyes, your other senses weaken."
- Frank Herbert, Dune
 

Live plants. Sustainable, ethically sourced, native American owned.
 
69ron
#2 Posted : 9/3/2008 6:21:25 AM

DMT-Nexus member


Posts: 5826
Joined: 09-Jun-2008
Last visit: 08-Sep-2010
Location: USA
I'm sorry but this forum is about DMT and relating things. This post has no relation to this forum whatsoever.

Also, they are called incandescent light globes, and NOT light bulbs. I am so sick to death of people misrepresenting the facts.

Also your figures are wrong. You need to multiply all of those numbers by pie/2 to get the accurate amount of SWIMs needed to change an incandescent light globe. And do not forget about the DMT intoxication equation as well. Throw that in and you need 10 times as many SWIMs to change the darn things!

I can’t believe this. I am THE incandescent light globe expert. I’ve changed thousands of them and each one requires a slightly different maneuver, no two are identical. So some will take slightly more SWIMs to change than others. You failed to mention that detail.

Also, what if the glass is broken? THEN WHAT? You forgot about that critical detail. How many SWIMs are brave enough to tread that territory? I recommend that only the highly experienced even attempt that one. We’re talking bloody fingers and all sorts of bad experiences from amateurs attempting to go down that road. Yeah, leave that to us veterans who have the mind, body, and soul tough enough to handle that.

I’m not joking here. You can really have a bad experience attempting to change one that’s broken. I saw a friend attempt it and he ended up in the hospital.

I only hope someone out there can change it quick. I’m tire of sitting here in the darkSad
You may remember me as 69Ron. I was suspended years ago for selling bunk products under false pretenses. I try to sneak back from time to time under different names, but unfortunately, the moderators of the DMT-Nexus are infinitely smarter than I am.

If you see me at the waterpark, please say hello. I'll be the delusional 50 something in the American flag Speedo, oiling up his monster guns while responding to imaginary requests for selfies from invisible teenage girls.
 
FelixsMom
#3 Posted : 9/3/2008 7:52:13 AM

Beverly


Posts: 53
Joined: 03-Aug-2008
Last visit: 08-Apr-2016
Location: Gaia
ROFL! Can't get anything by YOU, Ron! (I was wondering how long it would take for the Nexus Brain Police to arrive - woowoo you're so funny!)

69ron wrote:
I'm sorry but this forum is about DMT and relating things. This post has no relation to this forum whatsoever.

Also, they are called incandescent light globes, and NOT light bulbs. I am so sick to death of people misrepresenting the facts.

Also your figures are wrong. You need to multiply all of those numbers by pie/2 to get the accurate amount of SWIMs needed to change an incandescent light globe. And do not forget about the DMT intoxication equation as well. Throw that in and you need 10 times as many SWIMs to change the darn things!


I only hope someone out there can change it quick. I’m tire of sitting here in the darkSad

Wink Surprised Wink Surprised Wink Surprised Wink Surprised
AND YOUR LAST SENTENCE [above] is the crux of the matter and really the only good way to end a lightbulb joke.
That part about screwing in broken lightbulbs was particularly visual, VISCERAL and yummy.

heheheheh - FM Very happy
"If you rely only on your eyes, your other senses weaken."
- Frank Herbert, Dune
 
Espiridion
#4 Posted : 2/22/2009 3:13:54 PM

--who.??..ME??--


Posts: 628
Joined: 12-Feb-2009
Last visit: 08-May-2023
Location: Aetherville


Has it been six months yet, 'cause...

Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. Carl Jung

 
memo
#5 Posted : 2/22/2009 7:44:48 PM

DMT-Nexus member


Posts: 295
Joined: 26-May-2008
Last visit: 08-May-2016
The United States Government has declared "WAR" on incandescent light bulbs! See:
http://www.wnd.com/index...p/index.php?pageId=58282
I believe that this is just a ploy to keep the peasants distracted. You know that the ban won't go into effect until after the end of the world in 2012 anyway!
Avatar art created by unknown Cambodian or Laotian. Everything else is fiction.
 
970Codfert
#6 Posted : 2/23/2009 4:42:36 PM

DMT-Nexus member


Posts: 272
Joined: 23-Jan-2009
Last visit: 22-Feb-2011
This is hilarious
All posts are fictional.
 
11:11
#7 Posted : 2/27/2009 6:52:59 AM

DMT-Nexus member


Posts: 122
Joined: 25-Nov-2008
Last visit: 07-Feb-2016
Location: In your head
Ahahaha
Psychonautical musical adventures

I am the Pickled Herring, raging through the streets of Aurangabad. Smiting the simian fortress of Agartha I fly with pan liners and garbage bags attached to my million tentacles of horrid putrefaction, eating souls and raining down corpses on the mighty city of Gruad.

Hail Eris!
 
cyb
#8 Posted : 3/2/2013 8:01:33 PM

DMT-Nexus member

Moderator | Skills: Digi-Art, DTP, Optical tester, Mechanic, CarpenterSenior Member | Skills: Digi-Art, DTP, Optical tester, Mechanic, Carpenter

Posts: 3574
Joined: 18-Apr-2012
Last visit: 05-Feb-2024
(2009)...Almost 4 years to the day henceforth ...we'll all be laughing again...
I'd lay money on it...

Wait....wut?...Surprised


???





Please do not PM tek related questions
Reserve the right to change your mind at any given moment.
 
FelixsMom
#9 Posted : 3/2/2013 8:22:14 PM

Beverly


Posts: 53
Joined: 03-Aug-2008
Last visit: 08-Apr-2016
Location: Gaia
Well - only 5 months off - but ALMOST exactly. Hi there CybThumbs up
cyb wrote:
(2009)...Almost 4 years to the day henceforth ...we'll all be laughing again...
I'd lay money on it...

Wait....wut?...Surprised


???






I'm laughing again! Haven't visited the Nexus in ages! How's everyone? Miss you! Love
"If you rely only on your eyes, your other senses weaken."
- Frank Herbert, Dune
 
cyb
#10 Posted : 3/2/2013 9:10:27 PM

DMT-Nexus member

Moderator | Skills: Digi-Art, DTP, Optical tester, Mechanic, CarpenterSenior Member | Skills: Digi-Art, DTP, Optical tester, Mechanic, Carpenter

Posts: 3574
Joined: 18-Apr-2012
Last visit: 05-Feb-2024
FelixsMom wrote:
Hi there Cyb

I'm laughing again! Haven't visited the Nexus in ages! How's everyone? Miss you! Love


Hey...nice to meet ya...

Your late...where you been? Laughing
Please do not PM tek related questions
Reserve the right to change your mind at any given moment.
 
The Traveler
#11 Posted : 3/2/2013 10:07:09 PM

"No, seriously"

Administrator | Skills: DMT, LSD, Programming

Posts: 7324
Joined: 18-Jan-2007
Last visit: 09-Feb-2025
Location: Orion Spur
cyb wrote:
FelixsMom wrote:
Hi there Cyb

I'm laughing again! Haven't visited the Nexus in ages! How's everyone? Miss you! Love


Hey...nice to meet ya...

Your late...where you been? Laughing

Yeah, where have you been?

Tell us your story. Smile


Kind regards,

The Traveler
 
Parshvik Chintan
#12 Posted : 3/2/2013 10:48:53 PM

DMT-Nexus member


Posts: 3207
Joined: 19-Jul-2011
Last visit: 02-Jan-2023
(continued...)
14 to turn the lightbulb into a vaporizer
2 to attach the lightbulb vape to a bong
27 to discourage lightbulb vaporizers and start a discussion on conduction/convection
6 to talk about the GVG
4 to talk about cheaper, potentially equal or better cheap methods
(...[?])
My wind instrument is the bong
CHANGA IN THE BONGA!
 
embracethevoid
#13 Posted : 3/2/2013 11:11:04 PM

DMT-Nexus member


Posts: 580
Joined: 16-Jun-2009
Last visit: 15-Nov-2017
Location: Everywhere and nowhere
FelixsMom wrote:
I just had to copy/paste this little gem for your <grinning> pleasure

How many forum members does it takes to change a light bulb?


1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.



Rolling eyes



69ron wrote:
I'm sorry but this forum is about DMT and relating things. This post has no relation to this forum whatsoever.

Also, they are called incandescent light globes, and NOT light bulbs. I am so sick to death of people misrepresenting the facts.

Also your figures are wrong. You need to multiply all of those numbers by pie/2 to get the accurate amount of SWIMs needed to change an incandescent light globe. And do not forget about the DMT intoxication equation as well. Throw that in and you need 10 times as many SWIMs to change the darn things!

I can’t believe this. I am THE incandescent light globe expert. I’ve changed thousands of them and each one requires a slightly different maneuver, no two are identical. So some will take slightly more SWIMs to change than others. You failed to mention that detail.

Also, what if the glass is broken? THEN WHAT? You forgot about that critical detail. How many SWIMs are brave enough to tread that territory? I recommend that only the highly experienced even attempt that one. We’re talking bloody fingers and all sorts of bad experiences from amateurs attempting to go down that road. Yeah, leave that to us veterans who have the mind, body, and soul tough enough to handle that.

I’m not joking here. You can really have a bad experience attempting to change one that’s broken. I saw a friend attempt it and he ended up in the hospital.

I only hope someone out there can change it quick. I’m tire of sitting here in the darkSad

FelixsMom wrote:
ROFL! Can't get anything by YOU, Ron! (I was wondering how long it would take for the Nexus Brain Police to arrive - woowoo you're so funny!)

69ron wrote:
I'm sorry but this forum is about DMT and relating things. This post has no relation to this forum whatsoever.

Also, they are called incandescent light globes, and NOT light bulbs. I am so sick to death of people misrepresenting the facts.

Also your figures are wrong. You need to multiply all of those numbers by pie/2 to get the accurate amount of SWIMs needed to change an incandescent light globe. And do not forget about the DMT intoxication equation as well. Throw that in and you need 10 times as many SWIMs to change the darn things!


I only hope someone out there can change it quick. I’m tire of sitting here in the darkSad

Wink Surprised Wink Surprised Wink Surprised Wink Surprised
AND YOUR LAST SENTENCE [above] is the crux of the matter and really the only good way to end a lightbulb joke.
That part about screwing in broken lightbulbs was particularly visual, VISCERAL and yummy.

heheheheh - FM Very happy

Espiridion wrote:


Has it been six months yet, 'cause...


memo wrote:
The United States Government has declared "WAR" on incandescent light bulbs! See:
http://www.wnd.com/index...p/index.php?pageId=58282
I believe that this is just a ploy to keep the peasants distracted. You know that the ban won't go into effect until after the end of the world in 2012 anyway!

970Codfert wrote:
This is hilarious

11:11 wrote:
Ahahaha

cyb wrote:
(2009)...Almost 4 years to the day henceforth ...we'll all be laughing again...
I'd lay money on it...

Wait....wut?...Surprised


???






FelixsMom wrote:
Well - only 5 months off - but ALMOST exactly. Hi there CybThumbs up
cyb wrote:
(2009)...Almost 4 years to the day henceforth ...we'll all be laughing again...
I'd lay money on it...

Wait....wut?...Surprised


???






I'm laughing again! Haven't visited the Nexus in ages! How's everyone? Miss you! Love

cyb wrote:
FelixsMom wrote:
Hi there Cyb

I'm laughing again! Haven't visited the Nexus in ages! How's everyone? Miss you! Love


Hey...nice to meet ya...

Your late...where you been? Laughing


The Traveler wrote:
cyb wrote:
FelixsMom wrote:
Hi there Cyb

I'm laughing again! Haven't visited the Nexus in ages! How's everyone? Miss you! Love


Hey...nice to meet ya...

Your late...where you been? Laughing

Yeah, where have you been?

Tell us your story. Smile


Kind regards,

The Traveler




Parshvik Chintan wrote:
(continued...)
14 to turn the lightbulb into a vaporizer
2 to attach the lightbulb vape to a bong
27 to discourage lightbulb vaporizers and start a discussion on conduction/convection
6 to talk about the GVG
4 to talk about cheaper, potentially equal or better cheap methods
(...[?])




lol

[geocities]<marquee>ME TOO!</marquee>[/geocities]
 
embracethevoid
#14 Posted : 3/2/2013 11:14:08 PM

DMT-Nexus member


Posts: 580
Joined: 16-Jun-2009
Last visit: 15-Nov-2017
Location: Everywhere and nowhere
Edit: why didn't it work?
 
FelixsMom
#15 Posted : 3/2/2013 11:59:56 PM

Beverly


Posts: 53
Joined: 03-Aug-2008
Last visit: 08-Apr-2016
Location: Gaia
Hi Traveler et al: You ask where have I been. I've been in 2 continents, and have pictures to prove it. I give you 3 guesses. and one of them was South America! But I am not certain I can tell you when I have been. Or rather, I can answer where but not when or vice-versa. Heisenberg's principle...still a work in progress. I hope!
Cyb, are you the white rabbit? Laughing

The Traveler wrote:
cyb wrote:
FelixsMom wrote:
Hi there Cyb

I'm laughing again! Haven't visited the Nexus in ages! How's everyone? Miss you! Love


Hey...nice to meet ya...

Your late...where you been? Laughing

Yeah, where have you been?

Tell us your story. Smile


Kind regards,

The Traveler

"If you rely only on your eyes, your other senses weaken."
- Frank Herbert, Dune
 
Jin
#16 Posted : 3/3/2013 5:49:21 AM

yes


Posts: 1808
Joined: 29-Jan-2010
Last visit: 30-Dec-2023
Location: in the universe
hey FelixsMom , welcome back to The Nexus

also hilarious post

it would be cool if you would share a few tales of your travels

illusions !, there are no illusions
there is only that which is the truth
 
cyb
#17 Posted : 3/3/2013 6:06:35 AM

DMT-Nexus member

Moderator | Skills: Digi-Art, DTP, Optical tester, Mechanic, CarpenterSenior Member | Skills: Digi-Art, DTP, Optical tester, Mechanic, Carpenter

Posts: 3574
Joined: 18-Apr-2012
Last visit: 05-Feb-2024
FelixsMom wrote:
Cyb, are you the white rabbit? Laughing


Thumbs up Wink Big grin


Please do not PM tek related questions
Reserve the right to change your mind at any given moment.
 
FelixsMom
#18 Posted : 3/3/2013 10:20:13 PM

Beverly


Posts: 53
Joined: 03-Aug-2008
Last visit: 08-Apr-2016
Location: Gaia
Lovely! Well, the lightbulb joke has served to bridge the years it seems. Which is why it's a classic.
I wish I had some great adventures to relate, but really just busy surviving. I lost a lot of my connections when I changed ISPs, so was really happy to get a message from the Nexus in my *new* email address.
I used to chat with a few people that I think are still here, and look forward to seeing the changes that have gone down here as well.
Bear w/ my netiquette, I will try not to post too many silly meaningless items such as this. Very happy
cyb wrote:
FelixsMom wrote:
Cyb, are you the white rabbit? Laughing


Thumbs up Wink Big grin
"If you rely only on your eyes, your other senses weaken."
- Frank Herbert, Dune
 
DeDao
#19 Posted : 3/15/2013 2:25:07 AM

DMT-Nexus member


Posts: 1222
Joined: 24-Jul-2012
Last visit: 10-Jul-2020
I dont get it
"Think more than you speak"
"How do you get rid of the pain of having pain in the first place? You get rid of expectations"
"You are everything that is. Open yourself to the love and understanding that is available."
"To see God, you have to have met the Devil."
"When you know how to listen, everyone becomes a guru."
" One time, I didn't do anything, and it was so empty... Almost as if I wasn't doing anything. Then I wrote about it. It was fulfilling."
 
Mr.Peabody
#20 Posted : 3/15/2013 2:35:07 AM

DMT-Nexus member


Posts: 1310
Joined: 27-Sep-2012
Last visit: 01-Feb-2022
Location: Lost in space
Um, shouldn't this thread be moved to the humor section?
Be an adult only when necessary.
 
12NEXT
 
Users browsing this forum
Guest

DMT-Nexus theme created by The Traveler
This page was generated in 0.091 seconds.