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i feel bad. Options
 
proto-pax
#1 Posted : 10/19/2010 8:06:58 AM

bird-brain

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My friend died and my girlfriend broke up with me. He was a real human, and a blessing on this earth, and.


I'm just really fucked up right now. I had only just gained my trust back after months and months of healing with DMT. I. I had a mental snap about 5 months ago, and i dont think i can handle another one. Im flying solo my folks can't really help me or anything and im like 600 miles away from them, and i have like 1 real friend here. i dont know what to do. im not fucking good right now.
blooooooOOOOOooP fzzzzzzhm KAPOW!
This is shit-brained, this kind of thinking.
Grow a plant or something and meditate on that
 

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olympus mon
#2 Posted : 10/19/2010 9:11:29 AM

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i feel your pain my brother, my heart goes out to you. have you ever considered talking to someone who specializes in healing?
I am not gonna lie, shits gonna get weird!
Troubles Breaking Through? Click here.
The Art of Changa. making the perfect blend.
 
Spock's Brain
#3 Posted : 10/19/2010 9:47:31 AM

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1 REAL friend is good to have, I hope you pull thru.
"Infinite Diversity, in Infinite Combinations."
 
Newfound_wonder
#4 Posted : 10/19/2010 12:16:01 PM

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You have us. The Nexus will always be here (I hope). I can't imagine what you are going through, but maybe there is something we can do to help. The least I can do is offer you some kind words. Don't give up. Try making more friends in your parts. The drug culture isn't getting any smaller; chances are there may be some cool cats in your neck of the woods and you don't even know it.

And focusing on getting all the resources you need to live for the near future might be a good start. Find a house, find a job, find food, find friends, find peace of mind.
Every tool is dangerous when misused. That is no reason not to use tools.
Isn't it strange that a gift can be an enemy?
 
proto-pax
#5 Posted : 10/19/2010 12:19:36 PM

bird-brain

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im a student right now, and ive decided that im gonna work and kick ass at that until i figure out what to do. i am learnin german and i just re stringed my guitar. ive been drawing. 1 day at a time right now i guess. im gonna try and get some more sleep.
blooooooOOOOOooP fzzzzzzhm KAPOW!
This is shit-brained, this kind of thinking.
Grow a plant or something and meditate on that
 
Newfound_wonder
#6 Posted : 10/19/2010 1:11:20 PM

Harvie Krumpet


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Good to hear.

Peace
Every tool is dangerous when misused. That is no reason not to use tools.
Isn't it strange that a gift can be an enemy?
 
Felnik
#7 Posted : 10/19/2010 2:03:55 PM

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Try to keep moving, stay physically active take hikes, ride a bike. it helps alot. take notes,draw play music all good ways to focus pain in a constructive way.
The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible.
Arthur C. Clarke


http://vimeo.com/32001208
 
endlessness
#8 Posted : 10/19/2010 2:35:39 PM

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All the best to you bro! May your friend's soul go in peace.

I know how it feels when shitty things tend to happen all together. Like others said, do keep physically active. I think one of the things that helped me a lot in the beginning of this year when I also had a very bad moment was being productive, going running every day and eating well, dedicating to studies and also playing the guitar.

I think you're in the right way, its gonna be tough to go through but you'll make it and you'll be a better stronger person because of it! All the best and be sure we're here if you want to talk.
 
rOm
#9 Posted : 10/19/2010 3:36:25 PM

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You'll find a lot of support here, don't hesitate checking the chat room from times to times.
And feed your passion. It's a life savier. If you feel bad, don't lock yourself in lonelyness...
Life is out, and you yet have to receive much love and healing.
May your your friend rest in peace.
Smell like tea n,n spirit !

Toke the toke, and walk the walk !
 
Virola78
#10 Posted : 10/19/2010 3:38:37 PM

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Im sorry about the way things are for you right now.
Things will change for the better, eventually..

Try to accept the facts.
Good luck.

β€œThe most important thing in illness is never to lose heart.” -Nikolai Lenin

I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.
 
proto-pax
#11 Posted : 10/19/2010 4:22:28 PM

bird-brain

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I'm doing okay considering. The wheel of fortuna just swings as it does. I have started smoking again, but I'm definitely quitting.
blooooooOOOOOooP fzzzzzzhm KAPOW!
This is shit-brained, this kind of thinking.
Grow a plant or something and meditate on that
 
jblazingnataraja
#12 Posted : 10/19/2010 4:22:34 PM

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Ohhh shit dude - hope you buck up soon - and German is a good language to learn, you making it over there soon? I've heard it's a nice country, haven't been myself yet.

Good that you have restrung your guitar also - that will come in handy for sure, and the drawing - well it goes without saying that art as a form of expressing what you're going through is very good and sometimes cathartic.

Go for a walk as much as possible - just out in the forest, or around trees, or if you're on the coast - near the water, get away from your house, and get away from concrete jungle streets of grey.

Remember you have people whose faces light up because you come into a room, and that you probably have more people who love you than you even know.

Peace brother
I look into the world, wherein there shines the sun...
 
jungleheart
#13 Posted : 10/19/2010 7:33:12 PM

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A lot of universities offer free counseling services. I've been going to mine for a couple of months to have someone to talk to while I work out some issues and it has been great. My therapist is cool w/ psychedelics. If your campus has one, I def recommend checking it out.
 
ragabr
#14 Posted : 10/20/2010 12:17:23 AM

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I'm so sorry, proto-pax. You've gotten some wonderful advice here, and you have all our love.
PK Dick is to LSD as HP Lovecraft is to Mushrooms
 
Ϋ©
#15 Posted : 10/20/2010 1:19:47 AM

.

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you are not supposed to feel OK all the time I think
 
jamie
#16 Posted : 10/20/2010 1:26:05 AM

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^ohRolling eyes
nice one..you sound pessimistic all the time..just cus your life is shitty doesnt mean everyone elses should be.

I feel for you proto pax..not much else to say here but im wishing you some light brother.
Long live the unwoke.
 
Ϋ©
#17 Posted : 10/20/2010 1:32:12 AM

.

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:[ that's really rude and quite presumptuous.

i really believe that its a part of life to not feel ok 100% of the time.

helped me to realize that at least, sorry it does not you
 
Ginkgo
#18 Posted : 10/20/2010 1:58:06 AM

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I agree with house and I am sad to see such an ignorant post from fractal, whom I usually greatly enjoy reading from. The biggest life lesson to learn is for me that life is great, even when it's not. Life is like a rollercoaster, sometimes you are at the top, sometimes at the bottom. It is the times at bottom that makes you really appreciate the times at the top. Good luck proto-pax, I am sure this will all turn out great!
 
Rivea
#19 Posted : 10/20/2010 2:04:07 AM

No.. that can't be...

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Life comes in cycles some of them crappy. A long time ago (1987) I had three very special people in my die. One was killed in an altercation, and the other two died from diseases. It took some months to start feeling better about things after that. I talked and talked and talked with a couple special friends and that helped.
Everything mentioned herein has been deemed by our staff of expert psychiatrists to be the delusional rantings of a madman who has been treated with Thorazine who is hospitalized within the confines of our locked facility. This patient sometimes requires the application of 6 point leather restraints and electrodes at the temples to break his delusions. Therefore, take everything mentioned above with a grain of salt...
 
aetherbound
#20 Posted : 10/20/2010 2:12:39 AM

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I know it's little comfort to hear things like ," it will get better", "without the low points there would be no high points". But rest assured these things are very true. We often forget that it is ourselves that we mourn for, not the dead. I recently lost a very best friend and went down a dark path before understanding how enriched he made my life and how much he still affects me. He isnt gone just out of sight. I hear his voice and laughter all the time. Rejoice in your friends life and remember death just releases one from this body in which we are trapped. You are never alone with this wonderful community here and please do hit up the chat.

Much Love
Aetherbound
In all chaos there is a cosmos, in all disorder a secret order..Jung
All above writing with the exception of Dr. Jung's quote is pure mushroom encrusted cowpie!
 
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