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1664
#1 Posted : 5/8/2010 5:19:23 PM

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Last night was the night I decided to push a little further with spice. I have had some wonderful experiences so far, but lately I have felt some kind of boundary wall that seems to be preventing me taking things to a deeper level still.

I was nervous about the higher dose, my heart rate was notably up. I loaded 90mg of 1:1 darco / rue blend in a water bong and took two slow, long and huge lungfulls. I lay back, emptied my thoughts and surrendered to what would be.

The transition was smooth, there was no rocketship. To my surprise I emerged into nothing. None of the impossible patterns, or inexplicable occurances that I have experienced before. Instead I was in an infinite black void. No visuals, no real emotion, just stuck in this empty place. A huge spinning parabolic surface rushed around me, and I was aware that this was the way through to the deeper breakthrough space I had seen on previous journeys.

A hugely powerful entity which had no form that I could see barked at me that I had no chance at all of getting through tonight. It told me, in a very clear and communicative way, that I needed to change my life back "on earth" before I would be granted access to this next level. It said "dont bother to come back here until you have". It was not scary, and I knew better than to fight it, but it did feel like I was back at school and just got the bollocking of a lifetime by the head teacher.

Whatever this most powerful of beings was - it seemed almost angry with me, but more like it wanted to cuff me round the ear and tell me to get on with things. I have a few issues in my life such as my job which I find dissatisfying, it was clear (as it always had been) that I need to put more effort in to develop. The being said that all aspects - all areas of life in all dimensions need to be aligned in order to gain access to these deeper realms. I need to be happy here before I can go further.

I have read other experience reports about being "denied access", has anyone had such a specific condition imposed on access? I am changing things, developing, but do you think this message should be taken literally? Do you think it was more a case of having my set and setting not quite right, the fact that I had smoked some weed, was nervous etc? Or do you think it would be unwise to attempt another high dose until I have that new job etc? I'd really appreciate your thoughts.

Oh great - the world has just been replaced by elf machinery.
Sic transit gloria mundi

 

Live plants. Sustainable, ethically sourced, native American owned.
 
polytrip
#2 Posted : 5/8/2010 5:28:40 PM
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i've had something like that once. But it was more like a choice i was given: i could enter but than i would have to agree that i was perfectly content with my life here on earth as it was.
Something like: do you think you're ready to enter the world of beings that are perfect in every way and who don't have any earthly worry on their mind?
Even on spice i'm realistic enough to be able to answer that question.
 
gibran2
#3 Posted : 5/8/2010 5:59:03 PM

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I wouldn’t take it too literally.

I once had an experience that was progressing as it often does, and then all of a sudden everything went black, everything stopped. As if someone pulled the plug. I had a strong feeling that I wasn’t going to be allowed “back in” for a long time.

Another time I had an experience where I was “outside” looking through a window or doorway or something. I could see entities inside having a great time, and I was stuck outside.

In both cases, on subsequent journeys I had no trouble gaining access. Maybe it’s a test to see if you’re willing to persevere? Who knows?
gibran2 is a fictional character. Any resemblance to anyone living or dead is purely coincidental.
 
88
#4 Posted : 5/8/2010 11:22:38 PM

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I totally understand where you're coming from - the central message I've got from this whole experience is to sort out my life here on this plane. It is the fundamental lesson.

I would recommend you try to address some of the issues that you are aware of; that is what I have tried to do, with various degrees of success and failure. I know that I am still some way short of enlightened, and there are still many issues and problems that must be dealt with. There is no harm in trying to change these things, as they are probably the things that are the principle cause of unhappiness.
"at journey's end, we must begin again"
 
kyrolima
#5 Posted : 5/9/2010 2:48:47 PM

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we have to get back on track, live the good life.
If we don't we are stuck. Not only here, but also in hyperspace.

elusive illusion
 
Acolyte
#6 Posted : 5/9/2010 4:49:19 PM

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Yep same thing here!

All i get is the black void. I was told i need to share love before i can move on.



I say listen and get to work!Cool



@ gibran2, I ALSO get the "stuck outside of the party feeling!" it's always about 14-18 people who i only see briefly.

- During my first aya journey, right as it was ending: a saw a small crowd of people quickly gathered amidst a carnival to wave me goodbye as i lifted back into the sky.

- During an honest-to-god dream i was in a basement reception with crummy gray carpeting, a "fuzz entity" let me in, showed me to the buffet and there were only three tables; two of them were full with a very loud happy party and i had to sit off to the otherside of the room at a table by myself. I then found another room and met the TopHat entity.

- plus two more where i was the awkward new guy...

- now, it's just the void.
?
 
Saidin
#7 Posted : 5/9/2010 5:28:54 PM

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My impressin is that the powerful entity is your higher self. It is being given the opportunity to communicate with you clearly and directly though the use of spice. I'd contemplate what information it has passed onto you, and if you feel it was valuable, go with it.
What, you ask, was the beginning of it all?
And it is this...

Existence that multiplied itself
For sheer delight of being
And plunged into numberless trillions of forms
So that it might
Find
Itself
Innumerably.
-Sri Aubobindo

Saidin is a fictional character, and only exists in the collective unconscious. Therefore, we both do and do not exist. Everything is made up as we go along, and none of it is real.
 
1664
#8 Posted : 5/9/2010 7:14:17 PM

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Thanks for the replies everyone, they are appreciated. I will act on the advice / lesson for sure.

@ Acolyte - is this "void" a recurring theme, does it happen every time?

Also, as a more general question - do many people get messages specific to "everyday life" from spice journeys? I have to admit I was surprised that this happened to me - I always thought that place had little interest in what goes on here.
Oh great - the world has just been replaced by elf machinery.
Sic transit gloria mundi

 
Saidin
#9 Posted : 5/9/2010 10:03:49 PM

Sun Dragon

Senior Member | Skills: Aquaponics, Channeling, Spirituality, Past Life Regression Hypnosis

Posts: 1320
Joined: 30-Jan-2008
Last visit: 31-Mar-2023
Location: In between my thoughts
They don't care about what's going on here. They care about you.
What, you ask, was the beginning of it all?
And it is this...

Existence that multiplied itself
For sheer delight of being
And plunged into numberless trillions of forms
So that it might
Find
Itself
Innumerably.
-Sri Aubobindo

Saidin is a fictional character, and only exists in the collective unconscious. Therefore, we both do and do not exist. Everything is made up as we go along, and none of it is real.
 
mad_banshee
#10 Posted : 5/9/2010 10:16:58 PM

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1664 wrote:

Or do you think it would be unwise to attempt another high dose until I have that new job etc? I'd really appreciate your thoughts.



I've had those experiences just like you where some sort of powerful entity seems to deny access.
Like others have said, I wouldn't read too much into it. I would take the message , try to incorporate the message, and try again another day. After all, none of us will ever be perfect, and although I think spice helps us to understand perfection it doesn't always demand it of us

.
Peace

Mad Banshee

Note that the poster of this message would never actually use or recommend to use illegal substances. He is just an attention seeker and should be considered to be lying about everything he posts and his posts are only for the sake of generating discussion.
 
 
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