The Valley of Darkness:

Recently, I have had questions, concerns, fears even, regarding the nature of the entities, of the consciousness, we engage with Inside: I didn'tknow if they were good or evil, because sometimes I'm not sure.

My previous dream had come after a low dose of blue lotus/dream vine changa – at the time, I knew it wasn't quite enough, and the day dream had very dark undertones. The snakewoman abounded and she was pissed off with me, partly because of the low dose, but also because I had come in with unresolved problems in my life. As I was coming back out on that occasiob, I had felt hungry beings diving into my mouth, and trying to pull something out. I didn't know if they were taking something bad out of me, and healing me, or whether they were taking a piece of my soul.

This was the root of my concerns. But I knew there was only one way to find out – to go back.

So this time the biotechnology of choice was a very large bowl of Ayahuasca Android changa, a mixture of enhanced caapi and chaliponga. It delivered straight to the tryptamine palace, where the very stuff it is made of is itself conscious, multiple consciousnesses joined as one, existing and manifesting as a multidimensional plastic reality.

It was flipping around, roiling and oozing into anything … like quantum stem-cells, able to be whatever they want to be.

Or whatever I want it to be; because I am one of them. I am one of the consciousnesses that makes this hyperspatial plastic reality. It is not “them” - it is “us”.

I felt gratitude for what I was seeing – and immediately, the whole place smiled, exploded in pure joy. I'd recently bought some fresh cut daffodils, and they're in a vase next to my pilots seat, opening beautifully in their sweet electric yellow glory. Suddenly, the tryptamine palace was an explosion of daffodil-ness – I had brought them/us flowers and they fizzed with pure sweetness and joy. They were the manfestation of my gratitude. The sheer joy made me laugh out loud. Again, the whole place exploded in pure happiness …

'We LOVE gratitude! That's what we love! And joy!”

I knew then that it is our human capacity for joy and love and gratitude that they love about us. When my being was light, and full of joy, they responded and bathed in it, played with it, delighted in it, amplified it.

Then it was time for me to leave. Again, as always, I was squeezed out and to the right. Immediately, I was set upon by something hungry, trying to get inside me, into my mouth.

I said out loud: “if you are evil, then fuck off. FUCK OFF. You aren't getting into me.”

I opened my eyes. The dark spirits were pressed up against the membrane of my reality. By force of will, I held onto the feeling of joy I had before; I turned my head and my mind toward the light. But I knew I had to close my eyes and go back in.

“I'm ready. I am not afraid.”

I closed my eyes. I was being squeezed down a dark, fleshy, glassy tunnel. The tunnel itself was black, oily, corrosive, grotesque. It writhed and slithered and slipped and needed. It wanted to get inside of me. It was like a living sewer made of carnage and pure, black fear and dying flesh. An horrific, abominable place.

I know this sounds bizarre, theatrical and biblical - but this is what I said out loud:

“Though I walk through the valley of darkness, I will fear no evil. Because I am a warrior for the light, and for all that is good.”

I knew that the love and joy and gratitude in me, the delight in all that is good, protected me in this evil place. They/it could not harm me. They could not take me. Because I love what is good and light, evil cannot touch me or harm me.

I have no more fear of evil.

After a long time, I came out of the tunnel. I was purified by . I thanked the helper insects, who build the tunnels that connect our worlds. Love conquers all. Joy defeats darkness. The desire to give thanks is a bright light in the darkness, and the darkness cannot swallow or destroy the light.

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Nice comeback.

Try smudging your lift-off area before hand or burning some palo santo. These things help bring one to a familiar place.

Also, a small predose hit has worked wonders for many. It seems to allow the psyche to align to the spice experience and ready one for a deeper journey. Typically, for this spicer, getting whatever mental housekeeping out of the way with a single predose hit allows for a glowing journey a bit later.

And. Harmalas. I Never leave home without 'em...


E

thanks E ... waiting on a delivery of caapi, hoping next time to kick off with a nice cup of tea :-)

How is this bizarre? This is not bizarre. This is beautiful.

Good morning, Brother.

Who would have figured you could be such a spiritual creature?

The lessons never cease to amaze me and I find it daunting that the more we learn, the more we realise we need to learn. The gravity of the lessons are dauting too. How does one turn away from or deny a message like


This is amazing.

Nothing can kill the light, no amount of darkness can snuff out the light, love and light conquers all. So true.

Your descriptions of black slippy, hungry scavenging tunnels resonate with me. I have been consumed by the slippy blackness, entirely. I have been picked apart and possessed from my mouth. These are the lesser or my concerns though, I can handle these because I know that we have the capacity for love and as you pointed out it overcomes all, along with joy.

We cannot have the light without the dark, else it would not be light. Once again though, does this too fall into that category of all things in duality? Here-there, me-you, light-dark, things that fall into a category based on our human contruct?

I think it's perfectly acceptible to tell it, leave me the fuck alone. I don't like this and I don't want that. I have had to quietly pray, while in there and ask it, please, not like this, some light please, thank you.

These are lessons for you and I am happy for you that you are receiving them. When last did you commit to such an open exchange based on your surrender? I find your account nothing short of beautiful and profound. I am in awe of our human capacity for joy, love, change, surrender, light and above all truth.

You will now remember that I went through a little ritual of quiet contemplation, silent prayer and confirmation of intent as well as burning white sage to appease any maligned spirits. At the times you must have thought I was being a little nutty, but I only do this because I know where you have been or who has visited you. You must always remember though, that the light prevails.

I don't think that there is any taking from you or possession going on. I very often have this feeling that I am being possessed through my mouth, as I breath, as I exhale my life-force and inhale I give in to another one. It is sometimes an ominous feeling and not entirely comfortable.

Your report is a beautiful one though and what I loved the most was that you brought her flowers. Nice touch. The Daffodils even permeated your journey. Your intent was pure and you were rewarded for sharing this and your joy and your love.

Peace and Love.

Very nice report.

When i read these beautiful reports a few things come to mind.
Most important (to me , how does ones cultural and personal history influence the interpretation of the experience?

From my experience (mushrooms) much of the actual reality of the experience will fade (become impossible, paradoxical) as soon as one snaps out of it. What is left is the interpretation in some symbolic or (still symbolic) poetic form. A trip report or otherwise creative expression thereof, is in this way an interpetation. To me it seems plausible ones cultural and personal history (like set and setting for example) will provide the symbolism, at least to some degree. For example, the typical colourful layers that start hoovering and waving on all surfaces as soon as the mushrooms start.. you know what i mean right? At first they appeared to me as ferns or symbols. But as of lately i can clearly see fractals. Of course ferns can be described by fractals, so cauliflower etc, but still there is now a very different visual then there was years ago.

Any thoughts anyone?

Virola, I have been wandering many of the same thoughts lately. So much of the hyperspace experience reveals information theory and biological semiotics to me, and not things I had understood beforehand. It often seems like spice shows something and then arranges it so that the necessary material for interpretation becomes available.

Part of me believes that the intelligence we contact through entheogens manipulates probabilities within the world. Then, DMT has returned to the masses as we have need and are learning the appropriate metaphors to manifest its wisdom in the world.

wow amazing story . great recovery. I think it takes deep inner strength to go up against some of the things that are possible in these experiences. Anyone that has not been up against these things can ever understand the true level of crisis it can bring.
I notice with my own experiences that when i have a negative or dark one with that blackness you spoke of. I always feel like its something I'm actually bringing to the experience.
It can be a bad setting or bad health or weakness or burning the stuff by mistake. My headspace here on this plain seems to contribute to the level of negativity thats possible. When all my ducks are in a row here i never seem to have a bad experience. That being said there definetly seems to be multiple types of entity types with a myriad of personalities. My eternal question is what do we bring to it and what is static and unchanging in the hyperspacial realms?

Thank you all so much for your words and wisdom ... it means a lot to me to be able to share these journeys with fellow travellers.

I find that the old adage, "YOU DANCE WITH THE ONE WHAT BRUNG YOU", is true every time.

I always try to clarify my intent before going inside, usually by taking a walk. And before this journey, I knew I had this one question in my head - is there anything evil in there? And to be honest, I didn't want that as the question; I would've preferred something along the lines of "how many moons does your planet have", or maybe just a peaceful, defocused feeling of love, (which I'd had going into another journey that was beautiful beyond description).

But there was no getting away from it. The question of evil was there in my mind somewhere, and whatever's in there, is going to be "In There"... that was what I took in with me, and so that is what was addressed. I also took daffodils, and they were there too :-)

As dark as the Valley was, though, it was a massively healing journey. I really wasn't afraid; no matter how dark. That was the lesson, and it's had a hugely positive effect on my life here in the really crazy world (ie this one).

I don't know exactly where hyperspace is - everywhere, nowhere, anywhere - but the ship we travel in is our own psyche. I'm sure that the darkness I find is a part of me that needed to be lit up and cleaned out. And that is the healing part, the part I'm most grateful for.

so let me get this straight-

love and gratitude is what they enjoy in us?

you are a warrior for the light?

my face is getting sore from smiling so wide....

L&G!!!

It is a beautiful thing, brother ... PS took your advice re caapi before spice. WOW