Almost 800 views so far! lol

I'm still searching for someone. It'd be nice if she was into psychedelics. Seems like crazy wishful thinking around here though. Oh well. hehe, its easy to convert people anyway... The psychedelic experience in general and dmt in particular is like the ultimate convincer

this is a great thread and I love how basically everyone here is really looking for something special, for a relationship that is more than just physical relationship and shallow similarities. Its very nice to read all what you guys wrote

as for me..

25/male/somewhere

I had a 5 years relationship with someone, it seemed like a dream, but now its over.... Ill find someone again one day when im ready for it and right time comes.

She never took psychedelics but accepted my use and was a great companion in many of the trips. I could never be with someone that was against or couldnt accept my psychedelic use. Of course I would love to have a partner that would share with me the enthusiasm for psychedelics, but as long as the person respected my use, that is enough for me.

I dont know about this story of one and only perfect partner for each person, I think that there are many potential partners for many people in different possible types of relationship out there.. Also, if one always waits for the perfect person one might miss many oportunities (but yeah at the same time gotta find a balance because just going for anyone that crosses your vision is probably not a good way either).

Love is not all pleasure, one must sacrifice himself too. And like people said, a partner can be like a mirror, which shows you your own mistakes too. As long as the intentions are harmonious and both create this atmosphere of true love, then any conflict/friction that arises is not a problem, but the inverse, a great possibility for self-development.


ahhhhhh the heart, its so funny sometimes... I wish all the best for you all, you are great people and definitely deserve someone nice by your sides

ahhhhh.

Holy hell, you do that too? I like to go ninja, and actually listen. I like to try and relieve my senses of the focus demanded by conscious activity. Feel the floor moving, feel the air circulating, hear the moans in the distance, the activity all around me.. observing with my body.

Trippy

Anyways, my opinion on relationships is double-sided and by most peoples standards against the status quo.

People stay together in spite of each other. Relationships are managed by a series of compromises, whether or not we ever acknowledge that compromise. I maintain that the compromises I make in my relationships do not compromise my person; my mental and physical wellness which includes a flexible system of beliefs. That is to say.. as long as the person I am with improves the quality of my life, I will love and cherish them as partners and teachers in this temporary existence.

I once heard something a while ago that flip my opinions on relationship upside down, because I learned very quickly how true it was.. "No matter who you are with, there is someone better for you." I maintain that the "investments" that people talk about are beyond the purpose of our shared time on this planet. I could die tomorrow. I could suddenly go in some unexplainable tragedy of circumstances and coincidence. This is the ultimate truth for me, that people take their time here for granted and get hung up on petty issues. The ultimate question is whether or not I have lived in despair. This question umbrellas my relationships - all of them, and most significantly with my partners.

I have been with my girlfriend for a year and a half. Through me she has rediscovered life, found DMT, redefined friendships, and has began to seek her own creative outlets. Through her I have rediscovered the potential to be a great lover, a great partner, a role model to her two girls, and the opportunity to live in love once again. We met through CraigsList plutonics, just looking for some fresh faces to hang out with. Turns out we really meshed well. We've had our issues but as I said before, we make each other very happy and our relationship improves the quality of our borrowed time.

If you seek it, you will find it.

This guy pretty much has it spot on (with wriggle room.)

This is a kind of difficult and painful one for me to post but I feel like I need to do it in an attempt to get some clarity for myself on my current situation.

At 18, I met a woman ten years my senior and moved in with her pretty quickly. Looking back, it was mainly because I was incredibly unhappy at home as my dad suffers from severe clinical depression and I couldn't deal with it. Don't get me wrong, my parents are wonderful people but they've got problems of their own which were becoming too much for me, the intrepid young psychonaut who thought he knew better.

At first, as in most relationships, everything was great and we had a great time together although I learned too that my girlfriend also suffers from depression but thought I could handle it as it was nowhere near as bad as my fathers. She fell pregnant when I was 19 and I had the choice to either stay here and be the best father I could be or else to walk away and become another part-time dad which, to me, wasn't an option I could consider. Just after I turned 20 our daughter was born and my partner went into a psychological tailspin with post-natal depression which was horrendously difficult to deal with and heralded the beginning of ten years of stress, depression, aggravation and uncertainty.

To cut a long story short, she effectively lost all desire to be affectionate, emotional, sexual or communicative which has crushed me for years. I do my best to understand, to be there for her and to encourage her to talk to me about how she feels but she's coming to realise that she doesn't know how she feels anyway. It turns out that she's actually been like this for a long time before she met me but didn't tell me and presented herself as a different sort of person. The woman I fell in love with was artistic, creative and affectionate......now I realise that this was all a front and it hurts. I've had years now of having her look through my phone, try to check my emails and generally get paranoid for no reason whatsoever and it drives me MENTAL! I couldn't have female friends (this is something I've found very hard to deal with since I had a lot of platonic female friends my entire life) or even talk about a girl I knew because it led to her bursting into tears and then going crazy again! Right now, she's in therapy but says that she doesn't see why she should change for anyone else, we should all change to suit her which is something I've already tried and realised I can't do. That's an example of what I need to deal with.

As it stands, I stay here for my daughter otherwise I'd be long gone. My daughter, who's nine now, and me have a very close relationship and she talks me to about everything which is something she's less inclined to do with her mother. She's aware of how unstable her mother is and I just know that she's going to grow up resenting this which is something I wish I could change but I know there's only so much I can do.

Since turning 28 I realised that I need to prioritise my own well-being and happiness before I can ever made anyone else happy. Right now, we're literally on the verge of splitting up and I worry about the effect this will have on our daughter because me and her are so close. As it stands, I don't know what to do for the best. It's not good for our daughter to grow up in a house full of tension, I know this because it's how I grew up and the damage it did is something I've only started to repair in the last few years. On the other hand, I know that she'll have her own lessons to learn in life and perhaps the seperation of her parents is an integral part of that. I don't know. All I know is that I'm unhappy, frustrated, and confused.

I do love my partner but it's become more of a close friendship than anything else. I realise how I grabbed onto this relationship when I was younger, for as mature as I was for your average 18 year old I was still as immature as the next man, in the hope that I could be happy being with someone else. It hasn't always been bad, there's been some great times over the years but now I realise that the negative aspects have come to outwieght the positives, and that the stress of being in this relationship has damaged me too.

I don't know where I'm going next, but I know there's more to life than this. Hopefully my rant doesn't sound like self-pity 'cause it's not the way I feel. I feel stronger now than I ever have in my life, and wiser. On one hand, I've got an amazing daughter who I love more than anything in the whole of existence and have learned some valuable lessons in the last ten years that I probably wouldn't otherwise had learnd. On the other hand, I sacrificed my late teens and 20s's for a relationship which has brought me more pain than happiness.

Goddamned it, this life shit is confusing!

You just described my wife. She is the only one I cannot trick with my psychedelic rants, so much she sees through me.

She is a psychiatrist by the way. And psychedelics don't seem to affect her at all.

We have a deep connection on the level of the soul. I'm Death, she's Life. In the beginning I thought it will be me (in the role of the "Grand Jester" - my personal favorite) who will show her the psychedelic reality and together we will become the ultimate shaman, male/female aspects working together (the usual dream of psychedelic aficionados about the perfect relationship I guess). It didn't turn out like that. We couldn't connect to each other in that way. She felt that something is not right with me and since our first LSD trip together, she grew suspicious that behind all of the positive-looking spiritual facades I present to the outside world as "me", there lies a wounded child, a psychopath who would destroy this so much hated world in an instant if the possibility arose. And she may be right.

She is a woman, a protector of Earth and Life and everything that grows and becomes. Therefore she is an enemy of the arrogance of Man and his ideologies. And now this Man is me.

Hey bro, just want to say that I really wish all the best for you, and that you may have strenght to deal with this situation.. It must be indeed very complicated when a precious little life is involved and when the decision you take affects not only you but her too... Whatever it is that you do, be honest with her, kids realize things we adults couldnt imagine it was possible. If you decide to separate, as long as you dont disapear but keep being there for her as much as possible and reassure her that she is not losing you, she might suffer but she will understand it eventually.

even though we are all just names in a screen, for whatever its worth, we're here for you, so if you ever have anything you want to share, dont hesitate to post or pm me! once again, all the best!

Funny how when I post to a thread it all of a sudden appears to stop!

Endlessness, I REALLY appreciate your words my friend. I'll PM you anyway to say thanks but I wanted to put in on the main board and say what a wonderful thing it is that you've done. Your advice is priceless and I can't begin to say how much I truly appreciate that. Thank you.

Ident, I just wanted to say I read your post and thank-you for it.

^^ same here

Well...I'm 19 so I'm not that experienced,thus I cannot say that I know true love...but when I turned 14 I met this girl,she's like a ray of sunshine after a year of darkness and I am not exaggerating,she is literally the happiest being in the Universe,maybe she's one of the oldest souls in this Universe,that would explain a lot...not only is she beautiful and wise but when she is near, you simply feel the flow of ''good energy'' thundering through your body,and I am not the only one who noticed this...all of her friends noticed it,it's as if she's not from here...sad part is that I fell in love so deep that it literally hurt before I went to sleep for a whole year because I was thinking about her,she moved over seas so I never had the chance to tell her what I felt...we meet now and then when she comes back in vacation but I can't tell her the truth,maybe I respect her too much but that will never change,I don't know it's like we met before it's so strange,I know her without knowing her,I know her like we have been together for eons,it's the strangest thing ever...damn you LOVE...maybe one day I'll pull myself together and tell her one day...

Sheesh, please do not have sex on a cactus..i can imagine the results are devastatingly painful.


Sex and Psychedelics don't go hand in hand for me, I like to have the intimacy of being totally free, and I wouldn't go so far as to say I fit in with the category of 'Misanthrope' but I definitely have some "alone-Time"

Turns out the more psychedelics that I have, the less sex and I guess they are just reciprocal for each other in my life.

Although, damn, I went to Global, and I am down for some sex when I'm on acid.

beautiful aegle! Im so happy you guys have each other, both really special people indeed

Ident, that's really heavy. I'm glad that you've discovered what you need to do for your own health and well-being. Life changes feel so difficult, but I think we're all in your corner.

Aegle, that's fantastic. So nice to have both of you around.

Be excellent to each other, everyone!

What a beautiful thread I wish I wasn't jumping in so late. I am twenty years old engaged to be married ,we both love the spirit molecule and we are in the best love triangle that exists. Pure Bliss Love All

Aegle, I really like both you and Phlux..you guys are awesome!..makes me happy that 2 amazing people can find each other like that and make each other happy..I wish you both a lifetime of happiness together my friends!

Endlessness

Thank you for your more than kind words my friend, ill be beaming with happiness all day from your kindness.


Much Peace and Sunshine

Ragabr

Why thank you, indeed I am one lucky fish. :b


Much Peace and Happiness

Fractal Enchantment

Thank you for your beautiful words my friend, I am greatly touched. I wish you all the happiness and compassion that the world has to give...


Much Peace and Happiness

my sentiments exactly!

aegle hi!! how are you dearest? you avatar stuns me on sooo many levels! absolute emotion inducing! kind of like your fine self