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I'm sorry to hear about your difficulty my friend. I would like to help if possible.

So, psychedelics, being what they are, inherently change thinking, especially when used with intention. The change you may be experiencing could be traced back to the underpinnings in how you define "reality." The other factor worth mentioning is the relation between dream states and psychedelic states. They have some commonalities within the framework of the brain, thus, more of this occurs for you at night when you're getting ready to go to sleep.

Now is a good time to focus on integration. When you have these instances of "disconnect," try to stop and really pay attention and be with them. In doing so, you'll fall into an observer mode, suspending judgement, and you can focus on what's really occurring deep inside to lead to these experiences. Low dose psychedelics can also be helpful in integrating by putting you closer to that state of mind, but also closer to your regular baseline. The theory is that this will allow you to pull and apply from the psychedelic experience to your pragmatic life. You may want to refrain from any major journeys for a little bit.

One love

Somehow, as the time goes by you usually come back to the baseline. I have had my reality blown into bits several times and peaked through the veil again and again. Then I'm back here, worrying about the most mundane things.

In Hinduism the reality is called Maya, illusion. Our experiences are very subjective, although it's wonderful, when you can tune into someone else's frequency and share in their subjectivity.

I'd say don't fret over it too much. You have experienced things that will alter your worldview. It will take time to put the pieces together in your mind, but I don't doubt it will happen. The more you take psychedelics, the less the phenomena you encounter amazes you. The extraordinary becomes ordinary and the ordinary can become extraordinary.

Focusing on normal positive things, cooking, spending time with children, getting in touch with relatives, they can give you the sense that this Maya is not always such a bad play.

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I'm glad you've found communicating here to be so helpful. You are doing very well with your use of a non-native language. Have you tried typing out your thoughts and feelings in Italian first and then passing it through a translation program or app of whatever flavour? (It would be prudent to choose one that wasn't going to harvest your data, tricky nowadays I know!)

I've had feelings of derealisation (as it's called) in the aftermath of various psychedelic experiences in the past. Personally I just got used to it, in the sense that our philosophical underpinnings could always be subject to unexpected revision. Our ideas about how reality functions are only ever an approximation. Even this exchange of words is a higher abstraction of the more fundamental cognitive and emotional processes and thus verbal cognition will always carry a seed of contention. Have you ever heard of the Nam-Shub of Enki?

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