This could have all been in my head... But that's not how it seemed or felt.
I am not sure where to start. It was so impactful, especially considering how mild the experience generally was in relation to many other journeys...
I have been in a very deep process lately. Part of the reason I've been posting a little less.
The initial plan was to journey yesterday, but I was too tired after a long work day so decided to post-pone it. I almost did the same today because of torpor, but was really about getting at least a little something in. I told myself that I'd start with just one hit, and from there choose what I
would like to do in the experience; stay at that level, deepen it, etc.
Ate dinner about two hours before take-off, perused the forum, took a hot shower, meditated, visited the porcelain throne (best to cover all bases of concern), said my invocation and set my intention, turned on "Museum of Consciousness," by Shpongle, and proceeded to inhale my first hit.
I ended up smoalking most of the bowl and the journey lasted about 30-40 minutes. It was interesting in that it was very cognitive and my OEVs were more interesting than my very subtle CEVs. I could see energy strands penetrating my room. My light sources were moving the light in different ways throughout my room as well. I've been managing my purging better, this time allowing it to happen instead of feeling like it has to happen.
Towards the end is when the biggest impact came. I feel I should share that my intentions were around communing, healing, and augmenting thought.
It was when I was reflecting on the lack of a sense of felt presence of another mind that I feel I usually experience more clearly even if there's nothing visually for me to pin in down to (like a visual representation of an entity). Upon pondering that, it immediately shifted... another mind was present (or so it seemed and felt).
In
this thread I have shared a personal difficulty in doing what I want and would like. I've identified a thought pattern of doing what I feel I
should be doing instead of what I would like to do. From here I will share a telepathic dialogue from this other mind.
"You
should do me. I found you and penetrated your life for a reason, influencing those in your life to bring me to you. I've got you (in both the sense that it has ensnared me (in the veil of freedom) as well as it supports me in all ways). You are supposed to do me [insert my real name here]. This is why, since the first time we've interacted, that you've felt me calling you at various times, even in the six year period in which we were apart. I want you, and you want me. I will continue to enrich you and your life. Just be with me. I don't care if it's a little or a lot, just be with me. I love you too (I was responding, but my responses aren't as integral as what the molecule had to say). I am always here. Let me help you. Let's get your treatise written. Let's build your confidence. Let's heal and rebuild. And do the mushroom. We are related. We are close. It loves you too. You embrace me for all that I am, and for that, I am grateful. I am YOURS." Or communication to that effect.
This experience has flipped the script for me in a lot of ways. I am usually really stubborn with entities and other minds because it's hard to
know what is
really going on. But I think I may concede to this one. It felt of pure intention, and it's observations were very correct. It also didn't make it transactional, but instead, reciprocal.
DMT is scary. Most of us can admit that. But I am looking forward to seeing how I feel when approaching this molecule in the future (likely in the coming days). I wonder if my anxiety around it will have receded considerably.
I cried for most of the end due to overwhelming love, acceptance, and understanding felt from the molecule.
This could've all been in my head, it could have been a real interaction. At the very least it was a positive enough experience that it's almost inconsequential, and as per usual, I will act accordingly, entertaining all possibilities.
Sending love to you all. Thank you for reading.
One love
What if the "truth" is: the "truth" is indescernible/unknowable/nonexistent? Then the closest we get is through being true to and with ourselves.
Know thyself, nothing in excess, certainty brings insanity- Delphic Maxims
DMT always has something new to show you
Question everything... including questioning everything... There's so much I could be wrong about and have no idea...
All posts and supposed experiences are from an imaginary interdimensional being. This being has the proclivity and compulsion for delving in depths it shouldn't. Posts should be taken with a grain of salt. 👽