I just finished the third trip an hour ago. I waited like 30 minutes between each experience. All these were on enhanced Mexican tarragon.

1. ~35mg dmt

I was watching this circular thing and there were two beings by the sides of it. They had tribal paint on their faces and at least one was a woman-ish. In the circular thing was some information i was trying to decipher, of course unsuccessfully. The woman was giving me directions with her hands, it felt like she was trying to navigate me. One of her gestures was a triangle made with both hands. I was like: "oh yeah, that!" And they gestured to each other: "finally he is starting to get it!" Then the thing started disappearing and moving to the side. They were mildly frustrated that i was leaving and that i didnt get it... whatever "it" was.

2. ~50mg dmt, unfinished

I smoked some and was forcing myself to smoalk moar, but my body started going limp. My palms were extremely sweaty and my breath heavy, mom's spaghetti. Then i saw this flowing, shifting structure. It looked like one of those optical illusions where the space seems to wrap around itself. The whole thing had a circus-like vibe. There was at least one guy by the side of it, his face painted white and around his eyes black. He was a circus performer. He was doing this dance, while gesturing to me to go inside of that impossible thing. This thing was distinctly 3D, which im not sure i ever saw with a closed-eye visual. The thing then started fading and i opened my eyes. My room was flowing and i laughed for several minutes, not sure why.

3. ~50mg dmt, unfinished

I was watching this flower-like structure folding and unfolding itself. There were no entities, no unknowable knowledge being shared. I came out of it with a cold body, and i felt very doubtful of myself, sad even. Intrusive memories of unpleasant events were bombarding me. Not sure why, as there didnt seem to be any impulse to cause it.

Right after the experience i put on a random video to unwind, but unfortunately, it was a video about a cruel, piece of sh*t cop literally tasing a dude in the naked balls. That didnt really help my state.. haha. I feel a bit better now.


Do you ever get sad like this after smoking?

Yeah... DMT is an enigma.

Many individuals, myself included, notice a change in the nature of the experience the more that we encounter it.

Very rarely, do I feel that way after a journey, but it has happened to me. DMT can unlock a great deal within our own minds, and sometimes we have to confront what comes up. In your case, some self-doubt and unearthed memories. Like many other psychedelics, this can be a great tool in really looking at ourselves; the good, bad and ugly.

How does your afterglow feel? Are you experience a certain sense of well-being in the midst of this felt sadness?

A break in order to integrate all that you have gone through in a short time may be appropriate for you at this juncture.

One love

For me, one of the main reasons to use any of the teacher molecules is to make myself pay attention to the things I’ve been ignoring. Sometimes I get to see I’ve been ignoring how wonderful and mysterious and magnificent the universe is, or how much love there is in my life, but pretty often it’s some ugly shit that I just don’t want to deal with. But it’s important for me to look at because I know that ugliness influences my behavior. And just now and then, when I’m really receptive to it, I can see that just maybe, whoever was doing that stuff was really struggling and just didn’t know how to deal with things in any other way. Not saying it’s all Krishna and Arjuna and everything is as it should be, no matter what, and people should be allowed to do horrible things without consequence. I’m just saying that understanding how others were motivated to act poorly towards you, can free you from the influence of those acts.

Tripping always makes me go through a depressive dip. But there's a lift at the end. It's almost like a constant narrative structure that keeps coming back.

Yes. I don't know how DMT/harmalas compare to other psychedelics for others but for me and the way I take it they have a ability to both 'blow my mind' and to make me really deeply reflect on myself and my relations to the world. Deeper parts of me comes to surface and demands conscious attention and care. This is not always easy.



Yes! Good to hear that someone else is experiencing this too. I've read that some people don't feel so good taking smaller amount of DMT and I thought that it might be this that I'm experiencing. Because it's not uncommon that when I take the first hits (I mostly vape 15-20 mg after taking harmalas orally or sublingual before) that I get to a place where It's both a bit of confusion and dark thought and feelings. Much around me and my surroundings but sometime also about society at large. It doesn't feel like I'm 'seeing the truth' more like some perspectives and doubts that I have get blown up and out of proportions. I normally process these things and I don't feel like they are completely suppressed in my daily life. But with a expanded conciseness it can be a bit much.

If I however continue my session, vaping more and going deeper, the darkness often leave and I can process and nurture other feelings and thoughts.

I'm curious about the 'enhanced Mexican tarragon'. If you by that mean Tagetes lucida I think you are the first one that I've heard making enhanced leaf with it, exept myself.

I've done a lot of herbs with DMT for ~2 years, mostly home grown. I've liked Tagetes lucida but I often mix it with others that burns a bit better, like Mullein. The Tagetes also might have some effects in it's own that you might want to think about. More info here

that first report must have been frustrating. it is annoyingly curious for me wondering what you almost learnt and it is not even my experience, i can only imagine your desire to finish what you started.

yeah it happened to me before. Right after the beginning honeymoon period, then I wanted more, using it as a crutch to somewhat sidestep from the mundane real world. I was in a foreign country, couldn't speak the language with few friends but then the lock down happened. It was surreal feeling so isolated and unable to communicate to many people due to language. Anyway, it was the best I could had made it, but the more frequent I started smoke dmt (the most about once or twice a week). Then the power diminishes until a sort of deep unsatisfactory feeling starts to creep in.

So don't abuse it, like all substances - keep it the middle way. Moderation is the key.
Hope this resonates with you.