.
.
I spent several years dancing with with that monkey. It is no joke. It is by far the most alluring, satisfying and soul stealing chemical I have ever known. It smells amazing. It feels amazing. Suddenly, the standard human "
work hard get paid" ~
reward-system~ goes out..the..window...
It is like a pleasant swim in a warm ocean, like a mothers womb, then, before you know it, you are sinking and getting caught in the undertow, dragged further than you ever planned on going. The world becomes a twisted place where ones reward comes from stealing, lying, cheating and risking safety and freedom in obtaining it.
I cannot imagine a constitution or moral foundation that this chemical could not wither and erode. It demands your obedience and therefore your soul.
However, I would not change a thing about my past. I have regrets, yes, but they only remind me to know that when the light shines, I had better smile. The further the pendulum swings into the darkness, the more momentum it has towards the light on the way back.
Believe me. I am smiling.
Way to man up, Ident.
Opiyum, been there. Feel you. One feels judgement most harshly in the grip of taboo. When one thinks to themselves, "They don't know me..." they don't. They could not know without walking a mile. Ten miles. A hundred in anothers shoes.
I have been under that microscope. Lost all wordly possessions. Come out the other side.
The message is that no one should pass judgement upon another soul. Ever. No exceptions. None.
Judge only yourself and be your harshest critic.
Peace and love,
Espiridion
Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. Carl Jung