Or, maybe it was the Sexy Changa that did this... but I doubt it.

I was taken to a place where a huge mass of naked bodies was stuck together, floating in space. All kinds of people, male, female, young, old, overweight, thin... suspended... frozen in motion... twisted and contorted into all kinds of poses of desire. Jammed together, passing through each other, adhering to no real laws of physics (the Philadelphia boat conspiracy and Neon Genesis Evangelion come to mind?).

I wasn't frightened or revolted: for some reason, my first thought was, "I have to forgive them."

I began to Ho'oponopono: "I love you, I'm sorry, please forgive me, thank you," over and over. As I did this, the mass began to shrink and break apart. It was a huge block of energy in the collective consciousness. These people, trapped in and contorted by desire, were being set free.

When I was eventually spit back into my body, at my crown, I felt a golden, radiant, vibrating, buzzing sensation, clean orgasmic joy but without the carnal/wet/throbbing/burning element... Sexual, but a procreative erotic newborn elastic timelessness. Just clarity, a sense of being birthed, warm, protected and wrapped in LOVE and BLISS.

Forgiveness: 1
Cosmic Space Orgy: 0

INTERESTING aside: earlier in the post, I wanted to compare the mass of bodies to Granfalloon (if anyone here has played Castlevania: Symphony of the Night~). Wikipedia accurately describes: "In the 1997 video game Castlevania: Symphony of the Night, a boss was named after the term Granfalloon. It took the form of a huge ball of naked, human corpses held together from within by a monstrous parasite."

I have never Wiki'd Granfalloon--but, apparently, the word was invented by Vonnegut (one of my admired authors), and was used to describe a group of people bound together on a meaningless, superficial premesis, with no serious core values to unite them. In light of the vision, that's extremely interesting.

(And, no, I haven't played Castlevania in years. )

hahha, castlevanaia, that game kicks ass.

That sounds like a really interesting experience, forgiveness won over the "group of people bound together on a meaningless, superficial premesis, with no serious core values to unite them." Very interesting. Sounds like a profound experience.

Dams

forgiveness is just another way of LETTING GO....

the message is clearer and clearer......let go. surrender. rid yourself of ALL attachments. fear is one. let it go as well. sorrow is another. remorse.....let go of everything and die. die to be reborn. die to bathe in the infinite sea of creation itself.

beautiful gift you gave yourself MMM!! thank you for sharing such a beautiful one with us!! definitely a healing experience for all involved (you and anyone who reads this!) i'm not much of a video game guy (although i did recently buy bioshock for my new computer ) but i DO like the concept of this granfalloon entity. this amorphous dis-ease that binds the sleeping masses to one another. think i'm gonna rip that term and add it to my daily lexicon!

MUCH LOVE AND GRATITUDE!!

Should you perform a Freudian psychoanalysis on this experience in order to search for meaning? Is there a symbolism in this that belies a deep and real personal reality? Or do you just take it in, step away from it, and chalk it up to another wacky and nutty and random flash of unintelligible cosmic debris? How do you deal with this experience and what do you do with it?

Maybe I could channel Freud's ghost?

Aya has taken me WAY deeper than Freud, very far into the way prenatal development/birth/infancy impact development... I LOVE digging into journeys that way, they have been some of the most insightful... [this is a general answer]

As for this particular personal experience, it feels (my heart is the navigator) that this was definitely a part of the larger consciousness... I've actually chosen to be abstinent for a long period of time, for lots of healing and self-reflecting, so if anything, I've spent the past many months making great peace with my own sexual nature (through lots of visionary work )... It could be a final release of desire, if related to me, personally, maybe. Or, a more cosmic background noise from my immediate environment (I'm surrounded by all sorts of people and drama related to affairs ATM).

One of the first things that came to mind, though, was like it was a super compressed spiritual interpretation of the chaos and emptiness of selling cheap sex, strippers, pornography, etc. An inner emptiness that can't be filled [I addressed mine, some months ago, in dredging up everything in my brain related to sex]... Maybe, that I've done a lot of deep work with myself, I was now free to find compassion for the same cyclic trap of desire and try to release it on a more subtle level?

Just my rambling speculations.

I also thought it was intensely interesting, that once I began to trace the trail of related symbols, they all came back to a theme of a united social emptiness.

I don't think there are any meaningless flashes of cosmic debris. I have totally seen my share of weirdness--but it's always, always had some kind of meaning.

At least to my mind. ^.~

Thankyou for the report! That was a really good read. Amazing trip, one can tell you've been there when you described coming back into your body via the crown. Meditative and positive and all that is correct about this lifestyle.

It's interesting that there is a powerful and real substrate from which your experience came. It's like your dalliance with abstinence and internal delving of your sexual nature became manifest in your trip. Your vision was a giant metaphor or analogy, a poetic and artistic representation of your internal work. Cool.