Greetings Friends,

Desiring to share an idea, be humble and vulnerable before you, and nothing more.

Ontop of double depression, I deal with reverse seasonal affective disorder, in which my emotions and sensory input are elevated to an overwhelming state during the Spring and Summer. It has the propensity to throw my mind in disarray.

I've dealt with this since childhood.

This Spring and Summer, as an exercise in healing and managing my situation, developing a more grounded relationship with DMT, and working towards breaking through again, will be engaging in threshold and sub-breakthrough journeys.

Despite the overwrought directionless sadness (just sad, but for no particular reason; that's clinical depression for ya), I think this will be good. I'm keen on learning as it is, and even with the mysterious nature of the spice, I always learn something from it, even when it throws me for a loop.

I'm not looking for the spice to be a cure and discipline requires it not be depended upon. For me, it's an invaluable tool for growth, introspection, and exploration.

I don't expect it to rid me of any disorders, but to help me learn more about them relative to myself to better ameliorate them. (Note: I've been in therapy and have learned to be high functioning despite personal struggles).

We're never too old to learn. We're never too old to grow.

Thank you for reading.

One love

Are you familiar with mindfulness meditation? It's easy to start just by focusing on the little pause after exhaling and enjoying the calmness that it brings.

This is an easy practice in moments of emotional turbulence.

Have you access to any mushrooms? I think they are easier to handle for this kind of personal work.

Personal growth is indeed the best of intentions with these substances. 🙂

Thank you for your response.

I am pretty familiar with MM and have used it as part of my meditation practice for a while. I enjoy it. Sometimes the intensity experienced is not mitigated much by its usage unfortunately.

I actually started growing them last year. I love the process.
I'll probably use them in conjunction with DMT on a few occasions.
I find the higher intensity coupled with the unexplainable in DMT gives me practice in handling my own inner intensity. It helps me to learn to further "let go."

I have never been one to trip for "fun;" while it can be fun, there's usually a more important intention that is set.

Thank you again and be well.

One love

I have coupled mushrooms with pharmahuasca a couple of times and I think it's a wonderful combination. Mushrooms seem to give emotional warmth to the experience while DMT opens up the spiritual dimension. Sounds good, best of luck to your travels 🙂

Aya and pharma are on my list of future experiences. I can only imagine the synergistic benefit that comes from combining them with mushrooms.

The emotional unlocking and free flow is what I appreciate and revere mushrooms for, even when it's a rough journey.

And thank you. I appreciate your insight and support Tomtegubbe

One love