i load up 50mg as usual. take my first hit, blow it out sooner than i normally do, i'm a little extra apprehensive about this journey because yesterday on my second dosing my girlfriend walked in the door just as i was setting down the pipe. she's down with it, having mind traveled herself a few times, however it just threw me off guard. it was as if we were total strangers randomly catching each other buck naked and in a scramble to get comfortable.(this thought wasn't running through my head its just an analogy) what was actually running through my head was, this is like getting caught in the middle of a J.O. sesh with some porn goin on the computer. in a sense of, theres nothing wrong with this, just got caught off guard. so she heads to the bedroom, while i'm in the living room spacing out. what was going on in my world was almost like taking a kaleidoscope and shaking it up super hard, like water and oil. all my normal geometric patterns and entities were scrambling to find their places. it took the whole trip to put things back together.

now back to today; as i'm sitting in my chair, i have two thoughts in my head. one is to make right the jumbled mess of yesterday and make sure everything is back in place and the other is, i'm here to learn. so, i take my first hit, as stated above, exhale and finish my dose on my second hit and hold. i'm starting to blast as usual. its coming on a little slower than normal, but still fast. its building and building, the haze of geometrics starts to present itself and then all of a sudden.... nothing. i just remained in a state of haze. as i start thinking about why i'm not going further, i think to myself, i should wait at least a week to do this again. i feel unsatisfied by that experience, so i want to try again immediately, but after thinking about it, i feel like i should let things settle for a while before i try to go back. maybe also, since i just went twice yesterday that there may be a little tolerance, but not usually.

the one thing for sure that spice has shown me is that, you never know what you'll get. make sure you clear your mind completely before sending it and have a little respect.

i wanted to write this down to see what anyone elses thoughts might be on why i didn't have a usual 50mg experience. has this happened to any of you?

"Denial of access" I call it... It happens sometimes, don't worry about it. For me the only way to avoid it is to go in with a "pure heart", sometimes it takes me hours of meditation to reach that state.

What you said about jacking off, porn on the computer and such: there is nothing wrong with it at all, infact I believe that here in the west because of the media and the way we live many people are sexually repressed, utterly made slaves of by their own beliefs which are formed from shitty sources -
but, it is what it is. Its not right or wrong, but you know, if you're a layabout slob who jacks off all the time, thats not very attractive to cute hippie girls who like to stomp barefoot at outdoor parties.

as for your trip, well, take a look at your own expectations. DMT has a way of showing you things from 8 million angles at once, and im sure one of those angles you will realise that you were looking for something, which you should really have given yourself, or was there but in a different way than you were expecting.

I know the feeling, i've been there myself, you're waiting for some crazy shitstorm to hit the fan, and it just doesn't happen. Light trippyness. A strange feeling. A stoned feeling in your head. As he said^, don't worry.

When that happens, its the dmt's way of showing you that you need to take a break. Make it less the centre of your life. Take up a new sport, go excersize, walk the dogs, shit man, do whatever you want just not DMT at that time.

Its analagous to a trader; if you are purely inside your comfort zone all the time, when you visit hyperspace, you're not bringing anything fresh or new. In that place, you're looking at hyperspace for a source of joy, and really you should look to yourself and others to be happy.

I hope I haven't read far too much into this or overstepped my boundaries, its just my opinion afterall. but, I do know how It can go sometimes, what with all these mod-cons. PC's and TV's and freebase DMT's... And that to me, sounds like a classic "I want, I want!" kinda situation.

how are you smoking it..?
every method produces completely different effects..

if youre smoking 50mg and not getting off, then you have bunk spice or youre smoking it wrong.
to be honest, if i hadnt smoked speed before i found dmt, i would have been clueless as to where to start..
dmt will burn quicker than you can imagine.
when it burns, everything is lost.
find yourself an "oil burner" (tweeker pipe) and load that puppy up.
then slowly play around with how it melts and recrystallizes in the bulb.
understanding its physical properties is key to smoking.

ive never smoked 50mg for one trip.
its such a waste.
profound experiences can come from much lower doses.
the key to getting off is the administration.
you have to get enough in quick enough to take over your system

-smoking in a hand pipe or bong with some reefer is nice. here, you need to slowly melt the dmt into the reefer. you should actually get a vaporised hit first when you do this. then torch the bowl to cherry it. as soon as the bowl is cherried, stop with the lighter. take huuuuge hits. expand your lungs as much as possible and then hold for about 10 seconds. take more hits if applicable. this method is slow and it creeps up on you.

-smoking in a "tweeker pipe" works well. its super easy to waste product this way though. if you havent ever smoked dope out of one, skip this. getting the twirl down is a pain in the ass and you probably dont want to be seen buying one anyway. it does however work, and the trip comes up rather quickly.

-smoking in a "crack pipe" is by far the most outlandish method i have discovered yet. simply go to a gas station a buy one of the little flowers they sell in the glass tube. also pick up some copper scrub brush while youre there. i buy the "chore boy" brand. cut off a small piece of the chore boy and burn it until all the gold is gone. youll see the coating smolder off. take any stickers or glue or anything that might be on the glass tube off and discard the flower. (or put it somewhere nice.. whatever..) pack your burned chore boy in the end of the glass tube. heat up the end of the tube with the chore boy in it and then stick it on your pile of dmt. the dmt will melt to the chore boy. then, take your lighter and carefully melt the dmt down into the chore boy. repeat the process until all your dmt is melted into the chore boy. now, carefully heat the chore boy with a lighter. if you see smoke or vapors, stop and let it cool a bit. all your looking to do here is make sure the end of the pipe is uniformly warm. then, start hitting that thing like you would a chillum full of reefer. the smoke is hot and harsh, im not going to lie. it also tastes reallllly bad. i would recommend having a glass of something to wash your mouth out with. this method is, as i said before, outlandish. it feels like being shot from a cannon into the peak of every trip youve ever had. i know most people describe dmt like this, but i really cant emphasize the "cannon" part enough. the first time i used this method of ingestion, within 5 seconds my entire world spun left, as if winding up, and then unwound suddenly to the right. then, bam... i was there. with this method, you ingest so much so fast that there is really no room for failure. i will say however, this method is not for the faint of heart. the onset is so rapid that unless youre really well versed in space travel, it could be difficult just in that its so intense.

may i also suggest trying lower doses..?
50mg is soooo much spice.
i have weighed that much out to look at it, but have never smoked that much.
so much waste unless you have perfect smoking conditions.
if youve ever smoked speed, you know how vaporising small portions works much better than being greedy and making a huge puddle in the pipe.

patience is the key.
slow and steady.
really pay attention to the melting point.
dmt is a funny funny molecule..