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First Trip in years- I don't think anything is real now. Please help Options
 
Withoutmask
#1 Posted : 10/6/2020 3:30:30 PM

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So I was with a friend of mine and we decided to give it a go.. My experience is unlike anything I've read so far. The first few minutes I just started out of nowhere coming to certain realizations I felt I knew all along. Then at one point of another the thought came to me. And I said "everything here seems to be based on fear" and told my friend how we know if were not dreaming right now. I felt disoriented. Then this is went it got really odd. I went outside and I was on the grass in my backyard and it didn't feel real. I looked in the sky and seen a plane that looked exactly like a toy. Nothing felt REAL. I go back inside this house at this point and I'm walking around the house I see myself and she doesn't seem real. I ask her. Tell me something real. She looks blankly with no emotion and says "God" but it felt like a lie. It's hard to describe. Nothing at all felt real. And everyone around me didn't feel authentic. I got the inkling to write. None of this is real, don't be scared it's all an illusion. It's almost as if now I don't know whether this "reality" is nothing more than a dream itself. Also the tv was on. And as I was hearing it. Everything that was being said on the tv was clearly a lie.

Please can someone share with me some insight.

 

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Icyseeker
#2 Posted : 10/6/2020 4:03:37 PM

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I have felt this way before on some of my trips. The thought that something is off but you just can't seem to get your finger on what is off. When I started to have this vibe I would go off by myself and look for concrete examples of understanding that I have parsed out before the trip. This might be just a me thing. But I would go over the fundementals of calculus or some other branch of mathematics. I would also go over my understanding of chemestry and physics to help reassure my self that all is well. Having an understanding of even a small part of reality will help me to feel that things are ok and are "real". Another thing that has helped me was to tell the people that I was tripping with how I was feeling at the time. Once I was able to get what was going on inside out my friends could help me through what ever was going on. It wasn't a surefire fix but it did make me feel better about my current position.

Another thing that is super important is making sure that your in an envirorment that you expilicitly trust with good friends. Perhaps this trip is telling you that something is off about your home.
May wisdom permeate through your life.

"What is survival if you do not survive whole. Ask the Bene Teilax that. What if you no longer hear the music of life. Memories are not enough unless they call you to noble purpose." God Emperor Leto ii

"The only past which endures lies wordlessly within you." God Emperor Leto ii
 
monomind
#3 Posted : 10/6/2020 5:05:45 PM

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Withoutmask,

YOU is what real.

This is were you start... always... don't forget that... sit and meditate when you feel panic. concentrate on your body and breathing. They are real too.

As you said it yourself: 'real' is a feeling. Nothing more, nothing less. And using psychedelics makes you feel different... sometimes very different. don't forget that.

( and if nothing is real then it also means that by definition nothing can be a lie, no ? quite a peculiar state of affairs)

Now that I shared my thoughts with you, it is not clear from your post if you are in distress which is persisting. If this is the case find someone you trust to talk to, and try to calm things down.
And if you find that things are not getting better after few days and you are afraid for your sanity - consider seeking medical help.

Wishing you all the best.

P.s
What and how much did you take?

 
OneIsEros
#4 Posted : 10/6/2020 6:27:42 PM

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Happened to me before. I felt like I needed to wake up from the dream. I concentrated so hard beads of sweat fell from my head, while I was completely still (my trip buddy got so freaked out he left), then there was a flash of white light, ā€œBecause something is better than nothingā€, and I chanted ā€œI am God and so are the rest of youā€ for about 12 hours. I was on about 300 ug of LSD.

I have a capacity for that sort of thing. Most people donā€™t.

Donā€™t worry about it if you canā€™t wake up. Lifeā€™s not the Matrix or anything sinister like that. Thereā€™s just more to reality than we normally experience. Itā€™s a good thing. If you care about this sort of thing, a lifetime of study and meditation is your best course of action.

Neoplatonism, Vedanta, and Buddhism are the three biggest resources which consider questions like this. They have different conclusions. Take your pick.
 
Tomtegubbe
#5 Posted : 10/6/2020 6:45:04 PM

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I think we're so accustomed to the materialist worldview in modern times (even people with religious backgrounds) that experiencing the augmented world is very confusing and often overwhelming experience. As an adult you think you know how the world works and you think you can navigate through it and it sometimes feels like the world doesn't have too many surprises awaiting. Then you get a peak behind the curtain and are forced to realize that there is so much more to this world that you have thought ever since you grew up. It is the red pill.

However the everyday world is not a fake one. Even the matrix in the film of same name is phenomenally real to the people experiencing it. Of course, there is more to the world than the matrix or the common experiences of everyday living, but there is nothing more real in world than what you experience. DMT has taught me how utterly important it is to seek good in your everyday living. Everyday life is the hardest but also the most amazing trip you'll ever have.
My preferred method:
Very easy pharmahuasca recipe

My preferred introductory article:
Just a Wee Bit More About DMT, by Nick Sand
 
Withoutmask
#6 Posted : 10/6/2020 6:47:01 PM

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I think I took roughly 3 grams. It was in edible form chocolate. Some background information is. I have a severe trust issues. I question every ones intentions, and also have abandonment issues, where I feel alone. I can function at a high clip, however I'm usually putting on airs with people, when I get the feeling that they are not being genuine with me. I've been this way since I was 15. Over analyzing everything and studying human behavior while still developing on my own.

I'm ok now. To be honest I just feel like no one shows me who they really are, and I understand now that people are generally dealing with there own thing. I just spend way to much time thinking. There's all these negative beliefs I have in mind. Last night I was scared to go sleep feeling as if something might come and get me. So I didn't sleep until the sun came up.

I just want to experience the sense of peace and connectedness that people on this forum speak about in real life. I don't want to continue living life as if everything I do has to be calculated and a fear of this or that. This trip game me the feeling that all the decisions or most that I've made up to this point has been based on fear.
 
dragonrider
#7 Posted : 10/6/2020 7:34:55 PM

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I know the feeling. Hallucinogens can do that to you.

So the first thing i would want to say to you is: take some time to integrate this experience. Don't take anything mind-altering yet, before you have fully processed this one.

The other thing...nobody realy knows what reality is. I think that the concept of "truth" plays a key role in how the mind functions.
In artificial intelligence and neuroscience, a theory called "predictive coding" has become increasingly more popular and many people believe nowadays, that it gives a relatively accurate description of the inner workings of the brains neural networks.
And the concepts "truth" and "falsehood" are some key elements of the theory.

So what i want to say is: truth is incredibly important to us, but at the same time we do not actually know what it is.

What you can be sure of, is that your reality is the result of the interaction of you yourself with an external world that you can never truly know in it's pure form. You can only know it in the way you interact with it: sugar isn't realy sweet, it is just a bunch of carbohydrates. It is your interaction with it that causes the sensation of sweetness.

But your interaction with it IS real.

You could look at "reality" as a map we use, to navigate from one interaction to another. A map is just a map. The map of france is not the same as france because you can never fit all of france on a piece of paper. But if it is a good map, it brings you where you need to be.
 
downwardsfromzero
#8 Posted : 10/6/2020 7:36:50 PM

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Yes, sounds to me you got an inkling of our modern, occidental, "W.E.I.R.D." social structures. Like OneIs Eros says, there is so much more to life (than we can possibly imagine). Be prepared for a few more surprises of all flavours should you choose to venture furthoar!




ā€œThere is a way of manipulating matter and energy so as to produce what modern scientists call 'a field of force'. The field acts on the observer and puts him in a privileged position vis-à-vis the universe. From this position he has access to the realities which are ordinarily hidden from us by time and space, matter and energy. This is what we call the Great Work."
ā€• Jacques Bergier, quoting Fulcanelli
 
goddard
#9 Posted : 10/6/2020 7:44:02 PM

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Row row row ur boat gently down the stream
Merrily merrily merrily merrily
Life is but a dream

😉
ā€œClose your eyes and let the mind expand. Let no fear of death or darkness arrest its course. Allow the mind to merge with Mind. Let it flow out upon the great curve of consciousness. Let it soar on the wings of the great bird of duration, up to the very Circle of Eternity.ā€
ā€• Hermes Trismegistus
 
Ramma
#10 Posted : 10/6/2020 9:15:14 PM

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Everything is an illusion. This insight should be liberating and peaceful. 3gs of shrooms can sort of give the inkling, but 100mg of smoked dmt with harmalas will show you what that looks like and what it means. truly revolutionary and radical, unfathomable

as for your fear, what can be said? you and I know we have to strive to become more in tune with reality and to shed delussions and defilements--for our own well being and peace, first.
Behold, a sower went out to sow
 
OneIsEros
#11 Posted : 10/6/2020 9:59:20 PM

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Iā€™ll give a bit of insight that might help.

The ultimate principles of reality, at worst, are neutral/indifferent. At best, good. In that sense, there is no need to worry about ultimate realities. Ultimate reality is not sinister. Take solace in that.
 
Kumarajiva
#12 Posted : 10/6/2020 10:06:56 PM

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Pseudo-spirituality aside, you need to remind yourself about your body and the effort of existence.
If you are not in lockdown, strap on some running shoes and jog about 10km or so. The effort and sweat will
reset your mind and balance your chemistry. The hopelessness feeling will go away withing two weeks or so.
Baseline state (energy conservation) always takes over. And dont read too much into nihilism.
Everything is illusion as much as everything is not illusion and pretty real. You got trolled by the substance.
Dont get stuck in it. Let your regular habits kick in and you will be fine.

Be safe! Love
Gate Gate Pāragate Pārasaį¹ƒgate Bodhi Svāhā
 
OneIsEros
#13 Posted : 10/7/2020 12:01:20 AM

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Kumarajiva wrote:
Pseudo-spirituality aside, you need to remind yourself about your body and the effort of existence.
If you are not in lockdown, strap on some running shoes and jog about 10km or so. The effort and sweat will
reset your mind and balance your chemistry. The hopelessness feeling will go away withing two weeks or so.
Baseline state (energy conservation) always takes over. And dont read too much into nihilism.
Everything is illusion as much as everything is not illusion and pretty real. You got trolled by the substance.
Dont get stuck in it. Let your regular habits kick in and you will be fine.

Be safe! Love


Yeah, this person's probably actually right. If study of matters like this to an academic or monastic degree would be beyond your efforts, this would be the way to go. Contemplating these sorts of things isn't really a business suited for laypeople. Just shake the drugs off and focus on living sober life in healthy active ways.

A good way to get started on that is: in your next post, describe the ways you would do just that.
 
Jin
#14 Posted : 10/7/2020 4:42:22 AM

yes


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Whether anything or you yourself are real or not is not important , it still exists whether you believe its real or unreal , take comfort in the fact that your beliefs don't shape reality , it exists free of your beliefs and so do you
illusions !, there are no illusions
there is only that which is the truth
 
Orion
#15 Posted : 10/8/2020 2:44:18 PM

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"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.ā€ - Philip K. Dick.

Shrooms sometimes made me feel like everything was fake, to the point of not being able to take things I would usually enjoy seriously. They're better in nature, where everything is as real as can be. I never saw a tree on shrooms and thought 'what a load of pretentious crap'.

Withoutmask wrote:
This trip game me the feeling that all the decisions or most that I've made up to this point has been based on fear.


Don't fear fear. Easier said than done, sure, but it's a healthy mechanism to keep you alive and such. Perhaps the trip could have shown you things may not be 'unreal' but simply less serious. Perhaps we misinterpret it as 'fake' when we trip because we put so much stock in our lives and opinions, and anything less than that seems fake by comparison and our minds fixate on that ?
Art Van D'lay wrote:
Smoalk. It. And. See.
 
BobDobbs
#16 Posted : 10/9/2020 1:40:58 PM
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I don't know if this is readily accessible to you but try to get out into the natural world, find the beauty there - do something fun like pet a dog or cat (if those animals appeal to you) and put your bare feet (or hands) on the ground. Walking on wet sand or swimming at the beach is good for making that connection back to nature too. btw I can relate to trust and abandonment issues although I would say that they're becoming easier to deal with at this time in my life. None the less, trust yourself and next time you feel the need for some inner journeying really try to check in with yourself and feel the right time, place and mood.
 
Exitwound
#17 Posted : 10/9/2020 2:38:35 PM

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I will also add: welcome to the Chapel Perilous, to understand what that means, read Cosmic Trigger by Robert Anton Wilson, it will explain things.
 
endlessness
#18 Posted : 10/9/2020 3:05:10 PM

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I'm sorry you are going through difficulties! Please read our Integration section, it should have some tips on dealing with such difficult experiences.

Also, for the more philosophical talk about what is real, check these 3 threads out

Good luck with this integration process, wish you well!
 
Psyzsee
#19 Posted : 10/10/2020 5:17:03 AM

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it seems normal
 
fink
#20 Posted : 10/13/2020 2:17:23 AM
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Orion wrote:
I never saw a tree on shrooms and thought 'what a load of pretentious crap'.





Bwahaahha ...... most true words I've seen in months. Well done, thank you!
I don't know much, but I do know this. With a golden heart comes a rebel fist.
 
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