Did anyone ever dream they had a hard time making useful mental sense of a smoked experience?
I am very, very accustomed to working with Ayahuasca. I feel like she "took me in," we have an amazing relationship, and ceremonies are completely interactive. She is my guide. She is my teacher. She answers questions, and has a step-by-step lesson plan for my soul. She is awesome.
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In dreams of changa (after Ayahuasca, so there are plenty of harmalas to go around), though, I don't feel that guiding presence. It feels like smoking immediately throws one into the very peak of an Ayahuasca experience, with no explanation beforehand or after; no intact faculties to ask questions or navigate; and it is extremely hard to even remember coming down.
Did it take anyone else some time to get the hang of navigation? Part of the problem is that the instant breakthrough destroys the inner dialogue completely; with an oral experience, enough vestiges of a dialogue seem to be "allowed" intact to steer, comprehend, and progress the experience. Even in oral hyperspace, when the mind is geometry, some kind of observation/processing takes place, consciously. By the time inner dialogue resurfaces with the smoked variation, the peak has disappeared, and it seems very confusing to get linear thinking back online. It feels much more like unconsciousness, and then struggling to remember when consciousness is regained. The transition is so swift and seamless, it's very challenging to make use, remember, interpret, and comprehend; coming down is VERY similiar to dream recall.
But, dream recall is definitely strengthened through practice.
There is this amazingly powerful substance forged with great care, time, and love, that deserves the respect of proper use through complete understanding.
Any thoughts?
Some things will come easy, some will be a test