Welcome to the Nexus!
It can get intense indeed
Some things are also impossible to ever describe, but I guess it's all about integrating the lessons that can be found, while also appreciating the supreme artistry in those things that are hard to box down and interpret but are still a worthy experience to be lived and grow from.
Are you also delving into oral DMT/ayahuasca ? Personally I find that long term oral psychedelics are more productive and easier to deal with, though I have certainly had my share of exploration with vapped DMT and still might once every blue moon.
Be well!