NomadicPerspective wrote:I was having the best time exploring DMT for about a month. I was doing 4-5 sessions a week and the substance continually blew me away with different perspectives and fascinating experiences. I got to a point where I had two breakthroughs in the matter of a few days and could feel the DMT calling me for a third breakthrough, but done in the middle of the night. But I couldn't do it. I was overwhelmed with fear during the night and couldn't take the breakthrough hit. I gave in to the fear and felt awful. I felt fear all over my body and have been depressed ever since. It wasn't even a bad trip. I feel like a bad trip would have been much better than me giving in to fear like this and now I feel so weak.
Is fear useful or a hindrance? I feel like, on the one hand, DMT was teaching me to be fearless and trust the universe. But on the other hand, this fearlessness goes against many practical interests, and could potentially be dangerous, like leaving your door open when you leave the house or not having security on your PC. But I also felt like fear keeps us held back from many experiences and opportunities for growth.
There is this collective of fear related threads, it helps feeling understood:
PREFLIGHT ANXIETY & RAW FEARI hope you don't mind adding your honest testimony to the list?
What might help is cannabis in advance but that is an individual thing.
Harmalas can also take out an edge.
Don't feel obliged to vape plain freebase, there is changa and pharmahuasca too.
When I opt for a vape then I'm sure to agree with meeting fear face on and to be consumed by it. This is certainly not for every regular day the occasion for sure, just when I'm in full warrior modus.
Mind that people do take (longer) breaks for digesting experiences, or call that integration periods. Some vape like once a year, or even a decade, waiting for the call. I find pharmahuasca free of having initial fears.